People on the Internet are famous for having long discussions about labels. They debate the authenticity of how various people identify themselves. This has been going on as long as people have been chatting online. Forums are particularly fertile ground for this sort of debate. Male chastity forms endlessly discuss “purity” of the amount of time a man is locked in a chastity device, how many orgasms he is allowed, and the various physical aspects of the devices he may wear.
A topic of particular popularity centers around the subject of orgasm denial and the value of a chastity device in the enforcement of this denial. Tom Allen, who publishes the “Edge of Vanilla“, is also a moderator on one of these forums. He decided to come up with a way of classifying the essentially orthogonal practices of wearing a chastity device and orgasm denial. If you click on this link, you can read his post. He proposes that we plot degree of orgasm denial on one axis and amount of time spent in a chastity device on the other axis. I’m not going to go through the details. I suggest you read his post.
What interested me about this juxtaposition is the idea that somehow by relating one to the other, you could learn something interesting about the man involved. In my case, I spent three years locked up except for teasing and medical visits. The next three were divided between lockup and long periods of freedom. 100% of the time from December 2013 until now, I have been in orgasm denial managed by Mrs. Lion. I never get an orgasm that she doesn’t produce for me.
I never wore the chastity device as a way of assuring that I wouldn’t have any unauthorized ejaculations. Both Mrs. Lion and I were absolutely positive from the very start that once I surrendered sexual control to her, I would no longer masturbate. I like wearing a chastity device. It feeds into my kink about bondage. I have a lot of trouble wearing one lately because the devices I own make urination into the toilet a hit or miss proposition. Still, I do enjoy being locked in.
I think that most of us are way past the point where we believe that a male chastity device is required for orgasm denial. In the old days when people believed the mythology, they thought that a device that was not removable was the only way to assure control of their ejaculations. Our community has moved way past that point and we understand that orgasm denial doesn’t require hardware.
That brings me back to Tom’s thesis. I don’t believe he is claiming there is any direct relationship between orgasm denial and wearing a chastity device beyond the inconvenience of trying to get off while wearing one. It’s absolutely possible to do it. It’s just not all that easy. It’s my understanding that Tom wanted to provide a way of talking about the degree of acceptance of orgasm denial and wearing chastity hardware.
In that respect, I applaud him. Just because Mrs. Lion denies me orgasms when I want them, doesn’t suggest I don’t get any. I got 51 in 2019. That’s more than a lot of guys who practice orgasm denial, but it’s still less than I might have had if left to my own devices. Maybe, if Tom’s matrix catches on, part of our profiles will be a fraction. Mine is probably 5/7 which represents my use of chastity devices and orgasm denial on the X and Y axes of Tom’s matrix.
If nothing else, this effort to translate these activities into hard numbers offer opportunities to see if there aren’t other correlations. Could it be that if you plot degree of submissiveness against frequency of orgasms you get more insights? How about looking at type of orgasms: masturbation versus intercourse? Maybe consider the ratio between male orgasms and female partner orgasms? If you like numbers you can have a lot of fun with this. I wonder what percentage of people in each of the quadrants of Tom’s matrix keep spreadsheets that accurately record their orgasms and the amount of time they wait between them? This sort of stuff could provide years of fodder for chastity forum participants. Thank you, Tom. You’ve given a lot of people something to talk about.