My Left Hand

lion playing with himself at desk
If you wonder why I am so tempted to fondle, here’s a view of me at my desk working on this post. Since I am required to be naked, access is all too easy,
(Click image to view larger)

In my post  the other day,I asked if I had permission to do a little penis fondling so long as I didn’t put myself in any danger of an unauthorized orgasm. I suggested that Mrs. Lion has three options: allow it, forbid it, allow it but require I report each time my hand strays south. She selected the third option, at least for now.

Her plan is to evaluate how often I play with her weenie. She didn’t say whether or not I would be punished for such activities, but made it clear that she wanted some idea whether or not this is a serious issue.

I don’t know how she feels about casual touching. I’m pretty sure she doesn’t either. She has very strong feelings about me masturbating. While I didn’t learn about it until I asked her to lock me up in a chastity device, it turns out she had no idea I jerked off. It bothered her when she learned I had been doing it as long as she knew me.

The conversation at the time was about me masturbating until I ejaculate. Since I was being locked up in a chastity device, there was no need to talk further. I lost the ability to jerk off. Hell, I couldn’t even get hard.

Now, several years later, I’m allowed to be wild a good part of the time. I have full access to her weenie. I am conditioned not to masturbate. Except for writing about it, I don’t even think about jerking myself off. I really like being hard. I also like how it feels when I fondle the erect penis. Surprisingly, I have no inclination to sexually touch myself when I’m flaccid. I don’t try to give myself erections, but I do like stimulating the ones that come along on their own.

I’m pretty sure that at some point non-essential genital contact will become a punishable offense. The reason I believe this never crossed Mrs. Lion’s mind is that she never engaged in touching her genitals for pleasure. [Mrs. Lion – Um…wrong. I have but not in a long, long time.]

Here I am, always naked and edged daily. After several days without ejaculating, my penis reacts to almost every sexually related thought. Writing this post produces an erection. An erection tempts me to get more good feelings from my left hand.

In a lot of ways, being locked in the Jail Bird makes things a lot less complicated. If, for example, I were wearing it now, I still might try to get hard, but the steel cage would prevent any actual growth. It would also prevent my left hand from encouraging more arousal. When locked in the device, being horny is more mental than physical. When wild, like now, my desire to ejaculate is visible.

This may seem obvious, perhaps even trivial. I don’t think it is. All of us think about sexual control in terms of physical restraint. We might consider the idea that when unlocked, chastity means no unauthorized ejaculation. Obviously, it can’t mean no erections. They are only under voluntary control when the penis is physically stimulated. Otherwise, erections pop up at all sorts of times.

It may be possible to train a male to remain flaccid. But that training would invariably hurt his ability to get aroused at times when an erection is authorized. It’s also something I don’t think we signed up for. When I wrote my post the other day, I hadn’t been thinking much about erections. I had just noticed my physical reaction to writing when horny, and my inclination to increase my arousal manually.

Everything I’ve read about enforced male chastity, talks about the chastity device as a tool to assure the male is unable to ejaculate on his own. The fantasies underline this purpose. Nowhere have I read or seen anything that discusses erections. It’s true, that they are an absolute non-issue when the male is locked into a chastity device. Even discussions of “orgasm control” only address the ejaculation. Erections are not mentioned.

That’s what got me thinking. If orgasm control and enforced male chastity are only about controlling ejaculation, then perhaps the silence on the topic of stimulation and erection suggest that they are completely beside the point and as long as the male is either unable or doesn’t ejaculate on his own, he is fulfilling his contract to be chaste, even if he plays with his weenie sometimes.

I suspect that a lot of people, including most women, assume that when a male plays with his penis, the outcome is always ejaculation. Even in the case of a guy who is under no orgasm control, he will play with himself just to enjoy the sensations of arousal. I know I’ve done this most of my life. It’s just nice to enjoy sexy thoughts while gently stroking a hard penis.

I have my orders. For the time being I can fondle if I want, but I have to report each incident to Mrs. Lion. I will do that. Meanwhile, I’ve been thinking about a much wider topic: cage-free enforced chastity. Since using a chastity device is largely a male bondage kink, it’s completely reasonable to consider that many potential keyholders could be convinced to control their partners if hardware wasn’t involved.

Similarly, those of us who practice enforced male chastity long term, can reach a point when the inconvenience of the cage causes enjoyment of the kink to wear thin. However, at least in my case, that doesn’t mean my love of surrendering sexual control has also worn thin. Mrs. Lion owns my penis. I like it. I don’t want that to change.

We’ve agreed that the cage isn’t necessary for us to continue. It is part of our agreement, that the cage is always present. Mrs. Lion can lock me back up at any time for any reason. I expect she will be doing that in the near future. The point is that I am under her control whether or not something is locked around my cock.

During those times that I’m allowed to be wild, there has to be some understanding about her penis and my hands. There is no hardware to keep my paws off. As we’ve been discussing, there’s a lot of opportunity for sexual touching without ejaculation.

It’s too easy to just say, “Hands off!” True, a strict hands-off policy mirrors the effect of being locked in a chastity device. But expanding my ability to increase my own horniness can be considered an opportunity. So long as I am in no danger of ejaculating, perhaps being wild offers an opportunity to Mrs. Lion that she wouldn’t have when I am in a cage. Maybe, that’s just too much. Perhaps the rule that keeps my paws to myself makes sense since it assures that my only source of arousal comes from my lioness.

I’ve been wild for quite a while. I’m sure that I’ve done some fondling at least once a day. I just never thought about it. When I wrote my post, it brought the whole subject to the front of my mind. Part of me wanted to ask Mrs. Lion to permanently lock me up again. It solves the problem in an unambiguous way. Maybe that is the solution. I don’t know. I guess it depends on how Mrs. Lion feels about me being able to provide myself with a little sexual pleasure. Does she want all of it? If she does, I think the only realistic way to assure she gets it, is to get me back in the chastity device.


  1. I agree with You that You should be locked up as before. Mrs Lions time demands seem to be constantly increasing by taking care of Your weenie and Your discipline/punishment needs. If You truly want Her to be in control of Your weenie and discipline let Her decide without all of Your machinations. I understand Your need to write about all the what ifs and buts of male chastity etc. so I don’t know if anything can or will change.

    1. Author

      We all have different definitions of what works for us. What Mrs. Lion and I do is just one flavor. She is in firm control. She doesn’t need hardware to support it.

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