As directed, Lion was wearing his pink frilly panties when I got home last night. He was clearly uncomfortable so when he asked to take them off I let him. I had no illusions that they would turn me on and they didn’t. The only thing it accomplished was to let him know that I am in charge. Not that it isn’t important, but I’d consider the panties a bust. The nail polish is effective because he can see it but not feel it. He can forget it’s there until he looks at his toes. The panties are just physically uncomfortable. I don’t see an up side to his wearing them.

If I had to rate the last three attempts to show control, I’d say the nail polish is at the top of the list followed by diapers and then the panties. The diapers are at least comfortable until they get wet. If I allow him to change once he’s wet then the diapers will work. He’ll still hate them but they will be tolerable. He definitely has nail polish in his future. I even threatened to buy the colors of the football team we are rooting for in the playoffs. If they make it to the Super Bowl I may paint his toes in alternating team colors. I just know he’s looking forward to that.

I have designated tonight as my orgasm night. I’m still hoping to jump start things. So far I’m not any hornier than I was before I started scheduling orgasms. I didn’t think it would happen overnight so we will continue on with the experiment. Besides, it’s nice to have Lion’s attention. Tonight is also a Lion play night. I was thinking of unlocking him before he gave me my orgasm but I know he thinks I will want to play with him while he plays with me. Actually my thought was that after he gives me my orgasm, assuming I still have any energy left, I could ride him and maybe have another orgasm with him inside me. That way Lion would have some fun and I may have some more fun. I don’t think he’ll disagree with that idea. We’ll have to see how it goes.

Sunday night I got a surprise orgasm. I am starting to like surprises, at least some. Yesterday, Mrs. Lion sent me an email from work saying that when she comes home she expects me in my pink, frilly panties. Yuck! Well, of course I put them on and greeted her in them. Definitely not a turn on for me. Mrs. Lion has finished her monthly and set herself a new orgasm date: tonight. Now that’s a nice surprise.

We are a week away from our first enforced chastity anniversary. Mrs. Lion had an idea for gifts we could give each other: new wedding bands. Mine would have an engraved lock and hers a key. We both think the idea is very romantic. I’m not sure I could explain the lock at work, however. I love the concept, but something this obvious would be problematic. So, we are still searching for an appropriate way to mark our first enforced chastity year.

I’ve been thinking about symbols. We all know about wedding rings. They announce to the world that the wearer is taken and not available. They also provide a constant reminder to both partners of their lifelong commitment. My chastity device is also a symbol. Yes, it does provide physical restraint for my penis, but that isn’t its real power. The real power is similar to our wedding rings. It is an unmistakable reminder that my only sexual pleasure comes directly from Mrs. Lion.

Mrs. Lion has mentioned that our adoption of enforced male chastity revitalized our sex life. Since it is getting more active every week, and almost a year has passed, it’s clear that enforced male chastity isn’t just a cool sexual idea that grows old over time. I am surprised this has worked so well. Mrs. Lion has been a wonderful keyholder.

If you’re new to enforced male chastity and thinking about getting a chastity device, take a look at Getting A Good Fit. I think the single most common reason that people give up is because they have ill fitting devices. Yours should not draw attention to itself any more than your wedding ring does. Also, enforced male chastity takes time, a lot of time, to integrate into life. It will take months before you are fully comfortable wearing a device 24/7. Judging by our relationship, it will take more than a year to fully integrate enforced male chastity into your lives. Now that we are approaching the one-year mark, I can happily say that it is worth it.

Lion’s next orgasm is scheduled for January 10. Of course we all know I don’t care how long he has to wait. If I want to make him come I’ll make him come. He likes that arrangement. But last night he did question it.

I was happily teasing him and edged him a few times. Then I decided to stroke him very slowly. It took a while but he was getting very excited. So I kept stroking. Eventually he was bucking into my hand. And I let him come.

His first comment was that it wasn’t the tenth yet. I asked him if he was questioning me. He said he wasn’t and that he was grateful. A little later he asked why I decided to let him come. I said, “Why not?” He said that wasn’t fair. Not fair? Since when does our arrangement have to be fair? Since when do I need a reason to allow him to come? He seemed more satisfied when I told him I wanted to let him come. Exactly what the difference is between “why not? and “because I wanted to”, I have no idea.

When I first started playing with him I was thinking about making him wear his girly panties for me tonight. Now it’s definite. If he isn’t wearing his frilly pink panties when I get home from work then he’ll get some punishment swats. Lots of them. Why not? Because I want to.

Once upon a time, a long time ago when I was innocent and thought it was kinky to have oral sex, I came across a book that changed my life: The Joy Of Sex by Alex Comfort. Tucked near the end in a section called “Sauces and Pickles” was the description of Slow Masturbation For Him:

“To make this work you need to know how to tie your partner and to have a partner who likes struggling against resistance, but it works for a great many people. Traditionally, the woman does this to the man, but it plays in either direction. You need good access and a completely helpless partner, though you can try it without if bondage turns you off, but the result is quite different and you can’t get so far. The knack lies in playing on your partner like an instrument, alternately pushing him forard and frustrating them.

“The woman starts by tying the man to her satisfaction, either staked out, or wrists behind and ankles crossed, knees open, naked, and on his back. …She has two focal points to attend to, his mouth and his penis, and the knack during the warm-up period, consists in keeping both occupied continuously and without triggering ejaculation. The possibilities are obvious — hand to each, hand to one mouth or pussy to the other; varied by a touch of her breasts, her armpit, or even her hair. Between the two poles she will work over his most sensitive areas with her fingertips, her tongue, and her pussy — this last with one hand on his penis and other palm over is mouth, never letting the rhythm slacken. If his erection begins to go down, she stops, tightens him up, then re-stiffens him. She can now begin slow masturbation proper.

“This is about the most mind-blowing (and, while it lasts, frustrating) sexual sensation of which most males are capable. (If you want to know why we say start by tying your lover, try it for a few moments with an unbound partner.) She sits well up on his chest, with her buttocks to his chin, and puts each of her ankles  inside the crook of one of his knees, or sits with her knees bent and her calves tucked under his arms. She should hold the root of his penis with one hand and with the other pull the skin back as far as it will go with finger and thumb, thumb towards her. Then she starts quick, nervous strokes — each one quick, that is, but timed at one per second, no faster. After about twenty of these, about  ten very quick strokes. Then she resumes the slow rhythm. And so on. [Note: Comfort clearly never tried this himself. The hand that does the stroking must be well lubed or the experience will just be painful.]

“If she thinks he is about to ejaculate (you can sense this with practice), she should drop the speed and keep this up as long as she thinks he can stand it.”

That short (there is more in the book, but this is the part that got to me) section changed me sexually. Before reading this, I had never considered being tied up. In fact, I had no idea that people did things like that. Reading Comfort’s description, I could feel myself spread-eagle and a woman’s hands on my penis. I dreamed about this regularly for years. When I finally talked a partner into trying this with me, it was amazing, if unsuccessful. She didn’t hold me on the edge. She couldn’t read my signs.

Now, decades later, almost every other day, Mrs. Lion edges me. She brings me to the frustrating edge of orgasm as many times as she wants. I’m not tied down and generally, she stays a dozen or so strokes short of ruined orgasm. Also, she doesn’t practice the technique Comfort described in his book. It really doesn’t matter.

That short bit of text in a groundbreaking book about sex changed me forever. This was no  small change. It awakened a beast that has never since slept. Everything else: spanking, chastity, anal play, pain, and lots  more. My ex-wife’s horror at tying me up or spanking me is one of the contributing causes of our divorce. Sex is a powerful force.

I remain amazed that this single quote was (and is, actually) so powerful to me. How many of us can trace the absolute source of our kinks to a single event? So much of us evolves over many years. But this single short section of a book transformed me sexually. It’s turned out to be a happy transformation.

As Mrs. Lion mentioned in her post yesterday, we saw the movie “Sex Tape” last night. The main premise is a couple making a sex tape by acting out all of the stuff in The Joy of Sex. That’s what got me thinking about slow masturbation. Have you tried this?