The Chastity Talk
“But all you have to do…” These six words are at the top of a slippery slope of non-consensual male chastity. Male chastity, especially involving a chastity device is a male invention. Fantasies of forced sexual frustration abound in the male masturbatory world. I certainly had them.
Some guys feel driven to purchase a chastity device and “try it on.” Yup, that’s me again. Self-imposed, forced chastity is an oxymoron. No matter how you slice it, if you are locking yourself up, you are also able to unlock yourself when you decide to get off. This obvious failing occurs to all of us at some point.
Some of us are lucky enough to have a partner. And a few of us actually ask our partners if they would lock us up. A very small percentage of partners agree. After that first ‘yes”, comes the talk. You know, she asks, “How does this work?” Since most of us are pretty timid about asking in the first place, the very thought of a detailed conversation about how you want her to fulfill your fantasy is enough to make you want to run.
A lot of guys refer their partners to various web sites. Some even are sent here. In fact, the reason I started this blog in the first place was to provide a reasonably woman-friendly website about enforced male chastity. For the lucky few, the baby keyholder does some research and has an idea how to proceed. The cage goes on.
Until now, enforced chastity is a burgeoning shared kink. Alas, most of us can’t leave well enough alone. Faced with the realization of a sexual dream that has no orgasmic outlet, as sexual tension grows, so does the need for more. Emboldened by acceptance of the chastity dream, it’s time for enlarging the scope of her power. Right?
This is the beginning of a non-consensual dominant relationship. Chances are pretty good that the keyholder isn’t particularly excited or motivated by her partner’s cock locked into a little cage. She did it for you, not for her. She probably imagined that locking you up with periodic releases for orgasms is harmless enough. After all, it makes you happy.
But now your testosterone-fueled brain imagines new ways she can exercise her power and increase your frustration. It could be basing your release on a certain number of orgasms she has. Your fevered brain reasons that any woman would love to receive constant sexual stimulation. You are doing her a favor. So you have another talk.
“All you have to do is let me please you day and night,” you suggest. Maybe she doesn’t want to come so much. Maybe she prefers you to want to please her without the carrot of your orgasm hanging in front of your nose. See where this is going? Even if she says yes, is it something she really wants to do? Or, is it something that she believes will make you happy? Ultimately, success at any power exchange requires that both partners are getting something they want from the activity. The capital of making you happy will run out sooner or later.
That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t offer your latest, hot ideas to her. She may be willing to try them and if she likes them, add them to your lives. That’s how it works with Mrs. Lion. She will try what I suggest. If she likes it, we keep it up. If it turns out that I don’t like it, too bad; it was my idea, after all.
It’s very difficult to avoid pressuring your keyholder to go to “the next level”. You can’t do that. You can give her ideas so long as you remember to tell her that it is just an idea and she doesn’t have to do it if she doesn’t like it. Keep your power exchange consensual. Give your dominant partner a break.
A Little Normalcy
For the record, before Lion’s surgery was ever scheduled, I suggested getting a shower seat. It would have come in handy when my knee was hurt. And, since we don’t have any ledge in our shower stall, a seat will be useful for shaving my legs or even just washing my feet without doing the flamingo stand. Lion poo-pooed the idea so I never got one. Now I got one under the guise that it might be useful for him as well. I really do think he’ll need it. Once he’s able to have more than a sponge bath, he’ll still be drugged and potentially unsteady on his feet. Why not eliminate the need for him to stand at all in the shower?
Despite all the talk of a sick room and being handicapped, Lion was actually horny last night. I don’t mean that to sound like it’s been ages, but he’s been sleeping a lot so the horniness has lost out. It had been five days since his last orgasm, he reminded me. Oh, wow! Five whole days? I don’t know how he survived! I’m kidding, of course. First of all, five days is not an extended wait, obviously. But I think he said it more to illustrate that, at the five day mark, he should be horny. So I obliged.
We snuggled a bit and I decided to pinch his nipples. He doesn’t like that at all. I do it because I can. And because he doesn’t like it. And because he’s pinched my nipples in the past and that should never, ever happen. I told him I did it to get his mind off his shoulder pain. Yeah, sure. Then I decided it’s been a long time since my weenie had some quality oral time. Lion loves that. What I love is when my weenie starts out soft and grows in my mouth.
I didn’t really edge him so much as keep him at a heightened level for a while. When I knew he was ready, he started to buck a tiny bit, I decided I didn’t need to edge him at all. Very slowly, I brought him to a point where his bucking increased and then I let him come. He still didn’t have much semen. He’s been a little worried about that. I think it’s because we haven’t been playing like we used to. I don’t edge him every night. There’s no need to produce semen if you don’t think anything will happen. He’s not broken. He’s out of practice. There’s nothing we can do about that right now.
Crap
I drove the RAV4 to work today. It wasn’t exciting but it was pleasant enough. The car is nearly vegan. It has pleather seats. Well, the steering wheel is wrapped in leather. But otherwise it is a vegetarian, tree-hugging vehicle. Seems silly for a top tier predator to be driving it.
Sunday night (writing this Monday afternoon) was supposed to feature some fun sexual action. As you already read, it didn’t. Mrs. Lion had barely gotten out of her shower when I fell asleep for an hour. That’s a sure mood killer.
It’s been suggested that I’ve been too wrapped up in planning for my recovery. You could argue that I’ve gone too far, especially when I replaced my Mustang with a (shudder) Toyota hybrid. Maybe I have. It’s my nature.
I miss our normal life. It feels odd to have sex absent. It is a bit awkward around our house because Mrs. Lion seems unsure when she should put her paw down with me. She seems too careful.
I am pretty sure that my posts will be considerably less frequent after Thursday. That’s the day my surgery is scheduled. Mrs. Lion will keep you up to date until I am able to post again. Speaking of Mrs. Lion, she ordered some “sick room” supplies to help me while recovering. They arrived yesterday.
One item is a stool for the shower. We have a very large stall shower so it fits and leaves lots of room around it. It’s depressing sick-room white. But that’s not all. She also bought a toilet seat extender. It’s a white, toilet shaped thing that raises the seat height by about six inches. It attaches under the current seat. I think that device will make it easier for me to sit and then stand up again without the use of my right arm.
Both of her acquisitions are going to make life easier for me. Both remind me that I will be an invalid. We also bought an over-bed table like they use in hospitals. This will be very useful, but alas, is hospital-like. It’s pretty obvious that my ego is causing me some discomfort. I’m not surrendering easily to being handicapped.
It’s ironic that I had no trouble spending the rest of my life in a chastity device that absolutely removes any possibility that I can do anything with my penis. Isn’t the penis the center of what makes me male? Clearly, I am fine with losing control of it. I’m not fine with losing the use of my arm. But, like it or not, on Thursday my right arm will be in a sling and out of commission for some time.
Enough whining! I’ll learn to live with my disability. I’ll also get back my libido. In the meantime, thank you for putting up with me.
Wait and See
Lion and I had an exhausting weekend. Unfortunately, it wasn’t because of any sexual adventures. We were running errands, doing chores, and buying a car. We both took naps on Sunday afternoon. Lion’s been in more pain and I don’t know what my problem was. It was just nice to snooze together for a while.
Lion’s shoulder pain is now heading south to his elbow. I don’t think it’s because of a new injury or even worsening of the old injury. I think it’s because the cortisone shot is definitely all worn off and now the pain can go where it wants. I’m glad he only has to wait a few more days for the surgery.
Now that we’ve solved the problem of transportation, we can relax a little bit before the surgery. One more chore has to be completed that requires both of us. The rest of the chores would go more smoothly with Lion’s help, but I can manage them myself for the duration.
I don’t expect Lion to be frisky for a few weeks, at least, because of the pain and the “heroin” he’ll be taking. It’s unclear to us, and everyone is different anyway, how long he’ll be in huge pain. Some people say three days. Some people say three weeks. I know he’ll be hurting after each physical therapy session. That’s because his shoulder will want to hide in the corner and sulk. Once he starts moving it, it will complain loudly. Lion did say yesterday that the pain afterwards can’t be too much worse than what he’s been feeling lately. Fingers crossed.
My job, aside from taking care of Lion physically and emotionally, is to decide when the rules, FLR, and domestic discipline can start up again. There’s no doubt we’ll have some miscues along the way. He might feel great for a few days and we’ll decide to start, and then maybe he’ll feel worse. The main thing is to not lose sight of FLR and DD. We can certainly still talk about things throughout his recovery. He’ll have more time to read and discover new things he wants to try once he’s ready.
I just hope Lion doesn’t feel any pressure to get back to normal. He can give me a Lion weather report any time he feels the warm, gentle breezes of horniness. I won’t rush him. We’ll see how things go and, most importantly, talk about things. Lion’s need time to heal as much as they need sex.
