Derailed Plans

Lion baked a frozen pie yesterday and decided what we’d have for dinner. We were all set for dinner until we found out one part of it needed to be defrosted in the fridge. We didn’t think it would work very well in the microwave so we were stuck without dinner ideas. We have a few Hello Fresh! dinners but, at that point, I wasn’t in the mood to do anything too involved. Since I had my mouth ready for the planned dinner, I wasn’t even very hungry anymore. Lion was starving. We settled on tortelloni.

He fell asleep while I was cooking. He fell asleep while I was in the shower. When I brought out the Box O’Fun, he chose blue menthol rub and then told me he didn’t really want to play. We’d decided earlier in the day if he didn’t want to choose from the Box O’Fun then we wouldn’t do anything. I’ve committed to giving him some sort of activity six out of seven days, but he can refuse. The only thing he has to do is accept punishment. That’s non-negotiable unless there’s a good reason for not doing it.

I told him I still get “credit” for asking. In the past, if he said he didn’t want to play we didn’t. Then, when he was horny again, he’d complain that we hadn’t played in a long time. Um, there was a reason for that. It’s not like I left him hanging, but that’s what it feels like he’s saying. So now I’ll ask each night so I get my credit. He’ll probably still say it’s been a long time. He’s not wrong. He’s just presenting it like it’s my fault.

Tonight, he’ll have his balls, and wherever else I feel like putting it, slathered with blue menthol rub. In the past, he remarked that the blue stuff wasn’t all that strong. Once I slathered it all over, he hit the roof. Don’t be dissing my blue menthol rub! It can be just as bad as Icy Hot. And Icy Hot is still in the Box O’Fun, along with the tiny clothespins. Uh oh.

[Lion — The strength of the blue rub seems to go down with age. I’m not sure how old Mrs. Lion’s supply is. Old, I hope! Apparently she doesn’t have the roll-on Icy Hot in the Box O’Fun. That’s the worst!]

[Mrs. Lion — I never specified which Icy Hot I’d use.]

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