Let’s face it, the big reason couples drift away from sex is that the routine becomes boring. Orgasms alone aren’t enough to keep the heat turned on.It’s just human nature. We like surprises and adventure. No matter how exotic the activity, after a while it becomes routine and starts to lose its excitement. How can a spanking be routine? After a while, it can. In a FLR with discipline that might be a good thing. A spanking isn’t supposed to be fun or exciting. It is a punishment. But in a BDSM sense, it should be exciting on some level.
The same is true for enforced chastity. I suspect that most of the guys who try it end up bored and just want the device off. The concept is exciting. The reality may turn out to be tedious and boring. For me, at least, Mrs. Lion’s teasing ever night or two combined with my own inner movie about bondage keeps enforced chastity fresh for me. I think that if she just locked me up and sexually ignored me until she wanted me to ejaculate, I would have wanted to quit years ago. Mrs. Lion makes it a sexy game I enjoy endlessly.
At least that’s what I thought. In fact, even our very sexy edging can become routine. Yes, it is still a lot of fun, but the zing is fading out. This could be a failing of mine. I wonder about that. Do I always need things to be new and different? Do I want play to escalate the physical challenges I face? Sadly, I think the answer is yes.
I enjoy the challenge of longer and harder pegging. I like being trained to accept larger dildos. I like being blindfolded and not knowing what’s next. Sexual play is something I need to keep the fires burning bright.
Maybe this is my problem. I don’t know. Most recently, I noticed that edging and even orgasms weren’t as intense as they were in the past. I couldn’t understand this. Then, I broke a rule and got punished. After that, for a while at least, the edging was hotter and coming felt more exciting.
I suspect this is nothing new. I need that BDSM kink in order to stay in sexual form. As I think back over my past, it’s clear that either novelty or sensation play have been major turn-on’s for me. It’s how I’m wired.