Use Your Head (The One On Your Shoulders)

I read a post on one of the female-dominant blogs that reminded me of a common error in the “femdom” mythology. It talked about how a man will agree to anything when extremely aroused. The myth  claims that just before ejaculation, a guy will make promises if he thinks that by doing so, his partner will let him come. The idea behind this is that men are ruled by their penises.

That’s not a mistaken idea. But the timing is off in this case. Guys are well known to do things they hate if they believe they will get laid when they do. Think back to your dating days. Did you visit an art gallery, go to a concert, or see a chick flick because you knew your date would enjoy it and you would reap the benefits? The prospect of sex later is a powerful male motivator. We want to please our potential sex partners.

Back to the myth. If Mrs. Lion started to talk to me about something she wanted me to do or get just before orgasm, I would be distracted and lose the immediate urge to come. I don’t think I am unusual. I concentrate on the sensations very intensely when I am almost ready to squirt.

I’ve seen dozens of posts by “women” bloggers. – who knows if they are female or not – that claim the way to make a male obedient and agree to anything is to get him close to orgasm. I’m sure the readers of these posts are almost all males. It’s a hot fantasy to think that you can be turned into a virtual slave by a simple hand job. Give me a break!

I will agree that most guys lose interest in providing sexual stimulation to a woman after they ejaculate. That’s not to say that some of us will continue pleasing long after orgasm. But it isn’t as much fun. Many guys just withdraw. It’s an upsetting behavior to an unsatisfied partner who has to resort to her vibrator instead of his cock or tongue.

It’s easy to see how the myth got started. If a guy stops wanting to please his partner after he comes, then he will be most interested the hotter he gets. I think that’s generally true. But extending that thought to assume that he is most willing to do anything if he is on the edge of orgasm is just wrong.

That’s the physical side. Now let’s consider the message of this myth. It’s actually saying that a husband or lover needs to be in a super aroused state before he can be relied on to do something his partner asks. Really? If Mrs. Lion wants something, anything, all she has to do is ask. I will move heaven and earth to do it. My penis isn’t even hard. The reason is very simple: I love her and I want her to be happy.

For the record, without FLR, male chastity, or any other kink, that is true of me. None of that stuff changed the way I feel about giving her what she wants. Locked in a cage or wild, I will happily do anything she wants. If I just ejaculated, nothing changes. I may not enjoy it as much, but I will love seeing her orgasms.

The reason silly posts like this bother me is that some guys start believing this crap. They actually stop doing things out of love and wait until their partners either force them or jerk them to the edge of orgasm to do things their partners want. I understand that by feeding these hot fantasies, the writers sell books. One of the main reasons we started this blog was to provide reliable female-friendly information.

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1 Comment

  1. Author

    I do agree with you. I do enjoy helping my GF even if there is no sex involved. Wednesday I stopped by with maybe, perhaps, little sex time on my mind. When I got to her house she asked me if I would help her with some ironing. I held up a large table cloth as she ironed out wrinkles. Hmmm…. I thought, I anticipate some sex time! Then she said she would like a massage. My cock started to try and break out of my cage. She got naked and I got the massage lotion only to find out I would not be unlocked. No sex for me. Damn. I still enjoyed helping her.

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