The typical fantasy about enforced chastity is that the keyholder obtains and then locks a chastity device on her male. In real life this just doesn’t happen. Enforced chastity and orgasm control is almost always initiated by the male. Sometimes the couple selects and orders the chastity device together. More often, the guy orders it. In a lot of cases, the guy is responsible for locking and unlocking and removing the device. The keyholder retains the key and gives it to him when she wants him to take it off. In other cases, like ours, Mrs. Lion removes and puts on my cage. She lets me remove and replace the base ring, but I never touch the cage. This may seem like an unimportant distinction, but I think it can make a big difference.
If the male is the one who puts on, takes off, and stores the device, there is a tacit sense of ownership. He may be obeying orders to put it on or remove it, but it remains in his possession. That doesn’t automatically mean that he believes he is in control of his chastity, but it is an assumption it is easy to make. The other side of this is that the keyholder doesn’t demonstrate ownership of the chastity device. She may unconditionally own his orgasms and arousals, but she is indirectly saying that the cage is a device he can use to support his orgasm control.
This may seem like nit picking, but I don’t think it is. For a lot of guys, just wearing a chastity device that they can’t remove is very hot. It affects me that way. It’s bondage that can be in place 24/7. It forcibly prevents me from arousal or sexual activity. I have no say in it. The cage is implacable. That’s hot. The keyholder may not see it that way at all. She may wholeheartedly adopt orgasm control, but she may not find the chastity device particularly exciting. To her, it may just be a tool to keep her male honest. Or, she might think of it as something he wants to do. She accepts the control of his sexuality, but doesn’t strongly associate that control with the chastity device. She expects her male to keep hands and other things off, device or not.
That brings me to the most important point: If you were the keyholder, how would you feel about controlling a guy who requires an escape-proof cage in order for him to stay chaste? I know I wouldn’t like it a bit. Since enforced chastity is a power exchange, the person who has the power doesn’t usually want a new career policing the submissive. Mrs. Lion expects me to be obedient; especially in terms of enforced chastity. Caged or not, I know that I can’t arouse myself or get off. She owns my penis and my sexuality. Locked or not, that’s true.
For us the cage is important; not because it assures I won’t masturbate, but because it is an unmistakable symbol that she owns my sexuality. The fact that the cage prevents me from taking any sexual action reminds her that she needs to stay aware of my needs and provide the stimulation she feels is appropriate. As long as I am locked up, she knows I absolutely depend on her. That knowledge helps her sustain the effort she needs to put in. I like to be locked up. The bondage aspect turns me on. The cage also reminds me that I have to ask for any sexual release. It also reminds me of our FLM and that I need to ask for pretty much everything. I truly like the bondage aspect. It is very arousing for me to feel helpless. That’s why I love it when Mrs. Lion ties me to the bed.
I’m currently wild (uncaged). Mrs. Lion has unlocked me for the trip we are beginning today. She does it because it is awkward and messy for me to pee (even sitting) in the RV. She also likes the easier access on vacation. I don’t miss the cage right now, but by the middle of next week when we return I will be more than ready to return to it. The cage is clearly hers. I don’t put it on or take it off. She maintains custody when it is off. I do clean it and I put on and take off the base ring, at least for now. If she is willing, I would like her to handle that too.