Lion’s interviews went very well yesterday. Actually there were two and a half interviews. He’s excited about the first job and conflicted about the second. The second job is more difficult, with a department no one likes, and several people have already walked off the job. Forewarned is forearmed, but does he really want the hassle? Still, it is a job and he needs one desperately. Needless to say, his mind was elsewhere when I tried to play with him. He always feels so bad when he’s not in the mood for play. He apologizes and asks if it’s ok that we not play. Of course it is. I know he loves when I touch him, whether he gets excited or not. If he tells me he doesn’t want me touching him at all is when we’ll have a problem. Unless, of course, it’s because he doesn’t feel well.
We were both pretty exhausted last night. Neither of us has been sleeping well. About an hour after we went to bed we were awake again. Lion’s allergies were bothering him, along with my snoring. Yes, I snore. I think if people were honest, they’d admit that everyone snores now and then. When I first slept over, Lion snored so loudly he rattled the windows. And I still wanted to be with him. Anyway, when he tells me he can’t sleep because of my snoring I try not to snore. The only way not to snore is not to fall asleep soundly. As a result, neither of us slept well again. When the alarm went off I got up to make breakfast. Lion didn’t eat with me. He asked what was for breakfast, decided it wasn’t exciting, and went back to sleep. I got ready as quietly as I could, kissed his shoulder so I wouldn’t disturb him and went to work. I wish I could have stayed home to sleep. I feel like a zombie. I know eventually I will be so tired I have no choice but to pass out. I’m hoping that happens tonight. I also hope Lion gets the rest he needs. And finally, I hope he gets some good news on the job front.
I suppose I could be a bitch about things and not let lack of sleep and the job hunt interfere with our sex life. I could demand he be ready for me when I decide to play. I think it would be a little different if I wanted the orgasms. It wouldn’t matter if he was horny or not. He could just service me. But I’m not. It’s a little difficult to demand he get hard. The truth is, life intrudes all the time. Whether it’s illness or money or work or kids, life will find a way to sap your fun. The trick is to balance it out. Given the amount and severity of our financial issues right now, I think we’ve been doing a great job of maintaining any sort of sex life.