Some Things I Learned Over The Last Ten Years

Over the last decade, we’ve come full circle. We began by exploring enforced male chastity. I spent over three years locked in a male chastity device, only released for sexual attention and cleaning. I was trained not to masturbate. The emphasis was on controlling my sexual activities. We went through a lot of changes; all were documented here in our daily posts.

I think it makes interesting reading. I started with a rather naive view of the kink. My focus was on the removal of control that the chastity device enforced. I was all about security and my inability to get myself off. I suppose a lot of guys start off that way. I was very lucky that Mrs. Lion went along and became a strict keyholder. It took me a while to figure out the real dynamic under what we were doing.

As I now know, male chastity is a practice that is initiated by a man who wants to be locked into a male chastity device. In a decade, I haven’t found any examples where a wife demanded that her husband wear one. However, all of us want to pretend that we are surrendering sexual control to our keyholders. I don’t know of any men who weren’t released if they decided that they didn’t want to play anymore.

This discovery led me to a very important discovery: Chastity devices don’t need to be inescapable. They must be comfortable to wear. Fantasies aside, we want to wear male chastity devices. Often, guys stop because they buy male chastity devices that are uncomfortable and unwearable for more than a day or two.

A corollary to this revelation is that enforced male chastity isn’t a cheap hobby. Yes, there are tons of inexpensive Chinese male chastity devices that sell for less than fifty dollars. You’d have to be very lucky to find one that you could comfortably wear for long periods of time. Bespoke devices that cost upwards of three-hundred dollars offer the best chance of safe, comfortable long-term wear. Some guys don’t want to make that investment. I would argue that the high entry cost is a good thing. You can’t learn how well enforced male chastity will work in your life until you give it a fair try. If you invest a few hundred bucks in a device, it’s a good incentive to wear it. Right?

domestic discipline wasn’t so different

A few years after we started male chastity, I asked Mrs. Lion to be my disciplinary wife. I had been doing a lot of reading about domestic discipline. I was very attracted to and turned on by the idea of my lioness making and enforcing rules. I reasoned that if she would accept the rule of disciplinary wife, she would have a stronger voice in our marriage. I worried that she might be harboring deep-seated anger at me because she let me do things that upset her. If she could learn to punish me when I did something she didn’t like, the anger would be constructively expressed. Mrs. Lion agreed to try.

You can read about that worked out in our posts. Even now, after more than five years of DD, Mrs. Lion has a lot of trouble punishing me for annoying her. She has no problem spanking me for breaking a concrete rule, like missing a chore. It’s very hard for her to transfer that consistent enforcement behavior to things like me interrupting her or acting like a know-it-all.

A very important revelation for me is that I am the source of domestic discipline in our marriage. Based on what I’ve been able to learn, it seems that most, if not all, other DD relationships have similar origins. Also, based on what I’ve read, a lot of guys who are in disciplinary relationships don’t like to admit this origin. I think I have an idea why this is true. It’s hard to admit that you want your wife to punish you. If you are so inclined, it’s a lot easier to admit you want her to spank you because spanking is erotic. It’s entirely different to admit that you want her to punish you if you misbehave.

It’s way easier to revise history to say that she punishes you because she wants you to learn. That’s a lot easier to accept than the idea that you want her to do it. Obviously, all of us who are punished by our wives want them to do it. Very few women could really force us. Also, we believe that what we do is consensual.

I admit that there is a sexual component to my interest in domestic discipline. That’s not the important part. It might have drawn me to the practice in the beginning, but it has almost nothing to do with it now. I can’t explain exactly why, but ever since we began DD, there is a different flavor to some of the ways we interact. Even though Mrs. Lion has trouble spanking me for upsetting her, she knows that she can. She also has a way to help me remember to do what I’m supposed to do around the house. We have none of those annoying squeezing-toothpaste-from-the-middle habits here.

A good example of this came up just last week. Mrs. Lion makes coffee for us every day at 10 AM. She bought me an insulated stainless steel mug for this coffee break. More often than not, I would forget to bring the mug back to the kitchen after drinking the coffee. The next morning, Mrs. Lion would have to come into my office, fetch the mug, wash it, and fill it with fresh coffee. She got tired of doing this and made a new rule. I have to bring back the mug after I finish the coffee. If I forget, she spanks me.

This may seem like a small matter. It certainly doesn’t threaten our marriage, but it annoys her when I forget. Now, if I do, she’ll spank me. The spanking assures her that I know she is unhappy with having to get the mug at coffee-break time. Based on our experience, it doesn’t take too many spankings before I get a lot better at remembering what I need to do. Sure, it’s a small thing, but small things add up. For us at least, a sore butt makes for a happy marriage.

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  1. Maybe there is hope afterall
    From Medscape Magazine

    A topical gel that may work faster than erectile dysfunction pills has been approved for over-the-counter use in the United States. The gel, which can help users get an erection within 10 minutes, is already available without a prescription in Europe.
    The FDA approved the drug, called Eroxon, on Friday, noting that it is a first-of-its-kind treatment. Eroxon is made by the British pharmaceutical company Futura Medical, which specializes in drugs that are given through the skin.
    According to the product’s leaflet, Eroxon “stimulates blood flow in the penis through a unique physical cooling then warming e­ffect, helping you get and keep an erection hard enough for sex.” The company said on the product’s website that 65% of people who used the drug were able to have sex.
    A company spokesperson told CNN that the price of the product has not been set in the U.S., but it costs the equivalent of about $31 in the United Kingdom. Futura Medical has not announced when it will be available in the U.S.
    Harvard Health reports that 30 million people in the U.S. have erectile dysfunction, which means a person cannot get an erection at all or one firm enough to have sex. The disorder is often linked to other physical or mental health problems, such as heart problems or clogged arteries.
    Erectile dysfunction affects 1% of men in their 40s, 17% of men in their 60s, and nearly 50% of men who are age 75 or older, according to Harvard Health.
    Sources: FDA: “Device Classification Under Section 513(f)(2)(De Novo), De Novo Number DEN220078.”

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