Taking Choice Away From Me

Mrs. Lion and I frequently disconnect when it comes to interpreting what we write. For example, Yesterday, in my post “A Possible Twist On Male Chastity,” I wrote about low-energy ways to increase my sexual activity. One suggestion was new and a little radical. I offered the idea that each day I could be required to self-stimulate, but not to orgasm, to prime my sexual pump, so to speak. The second idea was to lock me up again in a chastity device. The idea behind that was to make me more sensitive to her touch since my penis wouldn’t get any contact until it was unlocked.

She put a couple of comments in my post and said that she had to think more about these ideas. Later, I asked her what she was thinking. She said, “I can lock you up if you want.” I don’t know what I expected her to say, but the message I got was that she wasn’t engaged with either idea.

Again, what did I expect? I’ve been thinking about that. I guess I wanted her to decide if she wanted to try either idea and if she did, simply tell me (or lock me) without further discussion. I would be fine if she rejected both ideas. After all, they originated in my horny mind.

Both ideas involve very limited participation on her part. One only requires occasional observation and supervision. The other is locking and unlocking a chastity device. The key, in my mind, is that she signs up and takes control. Obviously, either works for me. What never works is “If you want.”

As Mrs. Lion knows, I may want now while horny, but I will most likely hate the idea later when I have to deal with it at times that sex isn’t interesting to me. That has always happened when I wear a chastity  device. In the past, Mrs. Lion is happy to unlock me if I complain about wearing it. I hate that. The real sense of belonging comes when she refuses to let me out.

When I think about all those male chastity stories, the central premise is that the keyholder refuses to release her male. All those years that I wore a male chastity device, I knew that Mrs. Lion would release me if I told her I didn’t want to be locked up. She wasn’t a pushover. She put up with some of my grumblings, but I knew that if I were sincere, the device would come off.

Still, it worked for us. We’re in a different place now. Mrs. Lion is a strict disciplinarian who won’t end a spanking because I’m truly unhappy with it. She reminds me that is the entire point. The same thing needs to be true if we resume locking me in a male chastity device or requiring daily sexual exercise. Sexual requirements should be as consistently enforced as my other rules.

Does that mean if Mrs. Lion locks me up again, I will never be wild? No, I don’t think so. It just means that I don’t get input into when that happens. The same is true with sexual exercise. I will surely get tired of it. I will probably have times when I can’t get hard. What happens then? Out comes the spanking bench.

As I see it, the entire point of my suggestions is to get Mrs. Lion to be more assertive over my libido. She certainly doesn’t have to follow either idea. She may have one of her own. I’m fine with that. I just feel a need for her control.

new developments

I wrote the above post before Mrs. Lion wrote hers–the one posted yesterday afternoon. We had a little discussion after I read it. Mrs. Lion said that she didn’t realize how possessive she was about my penis until after reading my post. She said that in her mind, the idea of me masturbating, even a little, was definitely not what she wanted. I said that it meant I had to be locked up again full-time.

She wasn’t so sure. She said that if given the two choices of me stimulating myself or me being caged, then wearing a male chastity device was the only choice. I agreed but also said that if she realized that she wanted exclusive sexual possession of her weenie, the only practical way to do that was to keep me in a male chastity device full-time. She seemed a little doubtful about that. She was thinking that there was no danger of me playing with it if she didn’t want me to. Up until right now, I’ve been permitted to fondle and get hard. It’s something I’ve always done now and then. Even if I agree not to do it, I know I will. It’s almost an unconscious habit.

If Mrs. Lion wants to feel that she has full sexual posession, then she has to guard access in a way that realistically assures her of her ownership. There’s only one way to do that. Then, she is faced with the practical issue of getting access when she wants it. Getting me in and out of a male chastity device has been annoying her since we started. I can’t do it for her. I just can’t see well enough.

That means she has to decide what’s going to work for us both. Wearing a male chastity device is inconvenient for me. It’s pretty comfortable, but I have to deal with the little pinches and adjustments a cage requires. Still, it may be worth the trouble for us both.

I certainly feel her sexual control if she locks me up and makes it clear that I have no say on if or when I can be wild again. It is a constant reminder of her ownership of my penis if I can’t unlock on my own. The key for me is removal of choice. The advantage for her is that she can better feel her possession of my penis.

That’s a new concept for both of us. I never imagined that she felt possessive. I always thought that she liked knowing that all of my orgasms were produced by her. I didn’t think she cared whether or not I got myself hard. Apparently, she didn’t know she cared, either. Logically, if she wants exclusive possession, not only my orgasms but also my erections belong to her. Controlling them requires a male chastity device. I can’t get hard if I’m wearing one.

I’m not thrilled about being locked up again, but I do see the value of it. Now that Mrs. Lion is consciously aware that she wants full ownership, I wonder if seeing me locked in my cage will give her pleasure.

[Mrs. Lion — I still think this issue is not black and white. Given choice A (Lion masturbates but not to orgasm) or choice B (he’s locked in the cage again), I choose B. I don’t want him masturbating. However, I told him a while ago that I don’t mind him touching himself even if he gets hard. If he can manage not to masturbate, and he’s maintained that up to now, he doesn’t need to be locked up. Call that choice C. For the purposes of the proposed experiment, there is no choice C. If there’s no choice C, and I don’t want him to masturbate (which I don’t) then I’m left with choice B. If/when the experiment is over, choice C is back in play.]