Despite the fact that I’m working, I’m having trouble keeping track of what day it is. I keep thinking it’s Thursday. For days I’ve thought it was Thursday. I have no idea what’s special about that day that makes me want to hurry it along, but it still isn’t Thursday. I can’t imagine how Lion keeps the days straight. I do know that the longer his furlough drags on, the more he worries about his job and how we’ll pay for things. I also think he’s upset about his birthday. There’s nothing like a birthday to stir up feelings of mortality.
Between having an orgasm Sunday night and worrying about things, he didn’t want to do anything last night. I’m not sure what I can do to help except be there for him. Telling him to snap out of it is ridiculous. When you’re in a funk, there’s no snapping out of it. Ironically, I do tend to snap out of it eventually. By that, I mean I don’t gradually feel better. It seems to happen suddenly. When I had my recent whatever-the-hell-it-was, I felt rotten all day, up to and including the time I left work. I ran an errand on the way home and by the time I walked in the door I was fine. But that’s me. And I’m weird. All I can do for Lion is to keep things as even-keeled as possible and help him through.
Several months ago, I suggested that Lion’s wait time shouldn’t officially start until he was horny again. Since he’s not ready for action the day after an orgasm, should that really count? At times, he doesn’t feel horny for a few days. When I suggested not counting those days, Lion said they should count. Recently, however, he seems to be saying they shouldn’t count.
The problem, of course, is that it’s difficult to know when the clock should start. Does it start when I can edge him? Does it start when he feels horny? We haven’t been able to answer those questions. I guess that means we’re stuck with our current method. Not that there’s anything wrong with it. As long as we both realize it might not be the most accurate system in the world, we should be fine. When Lion sighs and says he’s waited X days, he needs to understand that the real number is actually less. I think that’s made it easier for me to make him wait. It may have been 21 days since his last orgasm, but he didn’t really start feeling it until the fourth day, so it’s really a seventeen-day wait. It’s funny how the mind can justify things.