Buried deep in any relationship, kinky or not, there always seems to be that little nagging fear about “doing it right”. Mrs. Lion worries about whether she’s making me wait between orgasms too little or too much. After seven years of doing this, you’d think that there would be no more questions about “just right”. Of course, there are.
I don’t react to things the same way year in and year out. I don’t think I’m even that stable across much shorter time spans. When dealing with something as ephemeral as ejaculation, it isn’t possible to set some sexual oven timer to just the right setting to make a perfect orgasm. Sex isn’t like baking. What makes things difficult for Mrs. Lion is that she, not I, decides when I’m ready. Thinking back to all the years that I got to decide, I can’t claim to have set my own timer very well either.
In one sense, sexual timing is opportunistic. Before male chastity, I got to have sex when it was available. True, I could always jerk off if nothing else seemed available. Even doing that carried some risks. What would happen if I masturbated today and tomorrow a great opportunity for a blow job came up. I might or might not be optimally ready to enjoy it. Worse yet, what if I played with myself in the afternoon and then that evening my partner wanted sex. I might not even be able to perform. I actually worried about things like this. As a result, when Mrs. Lion was very infrequently offering sex, I would put off masturbating as long as I could on the off chance tonight might be the night for the real deal. As it turned out, I rarely had a conflict.
Fast-forward to our current situation. I can’t masturbate and I have no choice but to wait for Mrs. Lion to decide to get me off. Because she isn’t interested in sex for herself, she has no biological clock to help her decide when I should ejaculate. Since we practice male chastity, even if she had that clock, it wouldn’t drive her decision to get me off. Or would it?
Every couple has their own particular male chastity style. Some enjoy excruciatingly long waits between orgasms. Others, have fun with keeping the male as horny as possible for more limited amounts of time. We fall into the second category. I think Mrs. Lion would be happy if she could discover some method she could use to decide when it was time for me to ejaculate. Over the years, the amount of time between my orgasms has increased. Part of the reason for this is that I’ve gotten older and a little sicker. This seems to have made it more comfortable for me to wait longer.
A bigger reason, I think, is that I’ve learned to appreciate being teased. I’ve learned to truly enjoy being edged. I haven’t learned to like it enough to forgo orgasms entirely, but I have acquired a real taste for it. This will not come as a surprise to Mrs. Lion. That still leaves the big question open. How long should I wait?
Under the rules of male chastity, I’m not supposed to decide how long. Even if it was up to me, I’m not sure I would have any better luck coming up with a schedule than my lioness. As she mentioned in her post yesterday, we did talk about not starting the clock until she was able to bring me right to the edge of orgasm. The reasoning is that until we get to that point, I’m not particularly motivated to ejaculate. Our recent experience indicates that this initial non-edging period can run anywhere from a few days to a couple of weeks.
It’s pretty easy for both of us to know when I’m in this zone. I am very happy to simply enjoy the sexual stimulation without any hope of orgasm during this time. Ejaculating only becomes important to me when Mrs. Lion can push me right to the edge. Then I really want to come. It makes sense that this is when her “orgasm clock” should start. We’re still begging the question. Once it starts, how long should it run?
So far, Mrs. Lion is ready to give in and let me have an orgasm before I am. Maybe it is a kind of sexual game of chicken. Perhaps the fun in it can be seeing who gives in first. Obviously, I can’t demand an orgasm when I’ve had enough. I think Mrs. Lion can tell when she’s pushed me to the point that I’m almost willing to do anything if she’ll just finish me off. I think this is where it becomes fun. So far, she’s never kept me at that point very long. I think the longest she’s made me wait after I get this desperate has been three days. What would it be like if she made me wait a week? Or two?
Would it stop being fun for me after a while? Would it become more fun for her when I reach that point of desperation? Would I ever get to that point? We don’t know the answer. We don’t even know how much fun it would be for her or for me if we try. Perhaps we should try to find out.