The Truth About Male Orgasms

Since I’ve been reviewing our male realities, I thought I would move on to our most scared cow: orgasms. The stories abound about the drastic personality changes created by withholding or getting an orgasm. Some enforced chastity fans write that they undergo a negative personality change for days after they come. They use this as their rationalization for needing to orgasm infrequently. I’m sure you’ve seen a lot of this on the Web.

The fact is that human males, like most mammals, are in heat all the time. They are ready for sex if a female is available to mate with them. Their arousal is automatic when a female in heat is sensed. Our social development has changed that behavior substantially. Humans engage in non-procreative sex much more often than they do to produce offspring.

Our male mammalian brains drive us to want sex. Most men’s orgasms are produced by masturbation. It’s hard to find a guy who doesn’t jerk off, even after marriage. It’s a safe, socially-acceptable way to satisfy our continuous heat. It’s also a way to keep the fires burning. If there is no release, eventually interest in sex will diminish to nothing.

Guys like me enjoy the idea of delayed orgasm as part of a power exchange. This often includes a chastity device that makes erection and orgasm almost impossible without removal of the device. Escape from most devices is possible, but that is beside the point. We want to be locked up. Why would we try to escape?

Most men think about sex a lot. It’s our male brains. Those of us with a sexual power exchange may think about it a little differently. I know that well over 95% of my sexual encounters with Mrs. Lion will not result in an orgasm for me. I will be teased to the edge over and over, but not given release. Eventually, I will be allowed to ejaculate.

All this teasing tends to focus my mind on our particular form of sex. I crave the teasing and edging. I actually like when I’m frustrated at the end of a session. That’s my conditioning. For four years, Mrs. Lion’s hand has been my primary sexual facilitator. Orgasm by her hand is rare, but build up to the edge is common.

When I finally get to come, it’s a normal orgasm. Sometimes super exciting, others slightly painful; no different from normal orgasms.

Mrs. Lion teases me and gets me off because she wants to please me. She has no real investment in my orgasms. The mythology says that our keyholders love to frustrate us. They use our frustration to manipulate our behavior so that we will sexually please them as well as do chores around the house. That chastity device is supposed to be their key to a sexual/household servant.

It’s incredible some guys buy this. If you aren’t willing to provide sexual service to  your wife without your penis being locked up, I imagine she feels pretty badly that you don’t want her. The sexually-selfish male stereotype that will only please his partner if forced is crazy.

My point is that the entire male chastity experience from delayed orgasm to wife pleasing is a male invention. It’s a hot fantasy for guys. I don’t think many women share it. It’s a game that is fun for both partners to play. But it is a game. It’s an extended BDSM experience.

If you believe it is something more serious, I suggest you both sit down together and do a reality check. It’s fine to play and get into it so deeply that you are convinced all this stuff is real. I love that and Mrs. Lion makes sure it is real to me.

But, it’s not great if deep down inside you believe this is truly reality. It’s a kink. It’s something we both like. But it doesn’t define our relationship. Our relationship is based on a deep love we have for each other. Sex is fun, but it doesn’t define us. Sex or no sex, Mrs. Lion is my mate. Period.



  1. Author

    Totally agree. Also agree it was never a “hot fantasy” for me, but that I now very much enjoy, and get hot sexually, keeping my husband in a state where he looks to me for his orgasm (or where I can “cruelly” deny it). Kinky power fun!

    1. Author

      When I asked Mrs. Lion if she feels the same way you do, she got cagey. I hope she agrees with you, but for now, she isn’t talking.

  2. Author

    Actually what I said was that I like giving Lion orgasms.

  3. Author

    I often have doubts about my wife’s true motives about why she keeps me denied. She does assure me that she enjoys it for its own sake. She says “It’s fun”. She enjoys the way it makes me more submissive, more attentive – a better husband.

    When she gets me to pamper her, which in her case is more often a foot massage than a sexual favour, she says I do it better and with more energy when I am more frustrated.

    I also have to be careful about expressing too much doubt about her motive as she finds it annoying and doing so is a punishable offence.

  4. Author

    The sad truth is that I prefer mastrubation to real sex. With myself, I can control the world I am in, with real sex, there is a danger that it becomes a technical exercise which can seem like a chore.

    There are times I’m very interested in sex and others when I’m not. I call these moments a ‘hormonal surge’. At my current mature age, the hormonal surge does not result in spontaneous erections. It just means that sex is on my mind more often and fantasies tend to wander through my mind.

    Yes, an orgasm does change my character. My priorities completely change. One moment, I really think it’s important that I subscribe to that sex site on the net. An orgasm later, I wonder why the thought was so foolish. I actually find the change in personality quite intriguing. It also reminds me that, at the heart of it, I am just an animal which uses fancy tool. And I like that.

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