I read an article this morning that said people who meet online are more likely to get divorced within three years than people who meet any other way. I can’t find the damn article to get specific numbers, but the logic seems to be that people who meet online don’t have the strong ties that people who met through friends or family have. There was also the category of people who met in bars. I’d think meeting online would have similar divorce rates to those who met in bars, but they didn’t seem to.

The divorce rate drops off after three years because the couple now knows each other better. Of course, they don’t say if the people who met online jumped right into marriage without really knowing each other. I’d assume any couple who jumps right into marriage without knowing each other would have problems. And just because you know each other doesn’t mean you aren’t destined for divorce.

There are a lot of holes in this article. It would help if I could find the stupid thing again so I could reference it. I always worry when anyone says something about couples who meet online because that’s how Lion and I met. We didn’t jump right into marriage. We knew each other for a few years before I moved in. I won’t say it’s been smooth sailing the entire time. We’re in a bit of a maelstrom right now. We’re not in any danger of divorce, but it’s quite bumpy. Plus, we’re well past the three-year mark. Whew!

Our biggest problem is communication. Sometimes we get stuck in the “you always do X” rather than the now-cliche “when you do this; it makes me feel this way.” We’ll be okay. We need more intimacy and more sharing. Sometimes I think couples don’t know what they need. We know what we need to do. We’re just having trouble getting there. It’s like knowing you need to eat healthier. Knowing it and doing it are two vastly different things.

Listen to this post.

1 Comment

  1. It seems to me that it doesn’t matter where people meet, the important thing is how well they fit together. Wherever they meet: in a bar, on the Internet, at a family dinner, it is not necessary to get married the next day without knowing anything about the other person. But the ability to compromise in a relationship is also important.

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