Over the years, so many of my initial thoughts on how we could have a successful power exchange proved absolutely wrong. I’ve discovered, at least in my case, that my imagination is rarely a reliable place to mine ideas.
Most of the fantasies I’ve read (and had too!), depend on an often-unattainable emotional mindset. For example, in the fantasies I grow unbearably horny the longer my penis is locked in a chastity device. My desperation grows to the point that I’ll do anything for a chance to ejaculate. This thought is extended to include taking over housework, sleeping on the floor, and demeaning myself in humiliating ways.
The fact is that the longer I am locked up, the less interested in ejaculation I become. Loss of sexual access to my penis tends to focus my attention elsewhere. It’s true that in the first months of enforced chastity, I obsessed about being locked up and ached to ejaculate. That wore off after a while.
Being kept in a chastity device is kinky fun, but it isn’t particularly useful to underline a submissive role. The reason I say this is that being caged becomes the “usual” thing. It’s a normal part of my life. The cage is just there; it’s part of me. I’m motivated by Mrs. Lion’s agreement to edge me every day or two. I would miss it if she decided to take a vacation from my penis. But the effect on me is not from being locked in a chastity device, it’s Mrs. Lion withholding sexual attention. I feel it just as acutely when I’m wild and this happens.
The source of my feelings is Mrs. Lion, not the hardware. I’m not saying the male chastity device has no value to me. It trained me to keep my hands to myself. I am not allowed to masturbate. Over four years locked in a Jail Bird has reinforced that rule and I no longer think about jerking off a a way to handle my frustration. Yes, it takes years for this level of conditioning, but it is effective and requires almost no effort for either of us.
In my opinion, the greatest benefit of enforced male chastity is the opportunity to “train” me sexually. If you are just thinking about being locked in a chastity device, I bet it is nearly inconceivable for you to imagine that you will never masturbate again. It’s crazy.
Some keyholders don’t mind if their partner masturbates; at least if permission is given. Mrs. Lion dislikes the idea that I have any kind of sex without her. I’ve thought about this rule over the years. Mrs. Lion’s rule is a stroke of genius.
All that stuff about being locked up turning men into docile househusbands is male thinking. A lot of men see that role as submissive and demeaning. Therefore, it fits the fantasy of losing power. Turning that into reality takes a lot of work for both partners. That’s why it often fails.
Almost every male likes to masturbate. I certainly hated the idea of never doing it again. It’s been my friend since I was 11. Taking that away from me represents a truly significant loss. It’s not role play for me. The device stops me from playing with myself. For years, I was locked up except when supervised by Mrs. Lion. I was surprised to learn that I’m trained not to jerk off.
This is a change I didn’t fantasize about. I never considered it. Mrs. Lion didn’t ask me how I felt about it. She put her paw down and that was that. She made this rule in the very beginning while I was super excited about being locked up. I think I would have argued more if it weren’t for the excitement of being newly caged.
The thought of being trained to keep hands off was arousing. After a while, I forgot about it. The caged remembered. Any stray thoughts about jerking off died when my hand touched the cage. Mrs. Lion didn’t need me to cooperate. It didn’t matter how I felt about masturbating. I couldn’t. Now, I just don’t want to do it.
That is a huge change.