As A Moth To The Flame

I believe in magic. No, not the stuff magicians do on stage; something completely different. Consider this: I know that when I am punished that it will hurt and possibly make me cry. I work hard to avoid being spanked. Yet, when I think about being spanked, I get aroused. When it’s time for punishment, my cock starts to get hard and I willingly place myself in range of Mrs. Lion’s paddle.

There’s an irresistible force that compels me to present my bare bottom to Mrs. Lion. It’s completely illogical. I don’t want what is about to happen. I hate how it feels. It doesn’t matter. I get aroused and find myself in position to feel that pain.

This isn’t the same as a child, head bowed, trudging into position for punishment. That unwilling cooperation comes from the recognition of superior physical and emotional power of the parent. I’m bigger and stronger than Mrs. Lion. I’m older than her. It doesn’t matter.

I’m not alone. Many guys are exactly the same. One plausible explanation is that in our male brains we think of spanking as a kind of sexy game. It turns us on, the theory goes, to think of that sexual control we feel when our naked butts are paddled or strapped. The force is strong enough to lead us to slaughter with our dicks at attention.

It’s true that we males are programmed to follow our cocks. It’s the mating imperative that keeps our species going. We are supposed to be in continuous heat and put mating on top of our priority lists. But we aren’t driven purely by instinct. We have intelligence and wills of our own. You’d think after the first couple of punishment spankings that sex would stop driving us to willingly submit.

Another argument, also plausible, is that I am naturally submissive. I am designed to obey despite the personal consequences. It’s that force that makes me present my bottom. That explanation is absolutely false for me. If it’s my submissive nature that makes me accept punishment, why do I get hard? I suppose there is the possibility that I find feeling such graphic control sexy. I can see that.

An explanation of why I behave this way is unimportant. The simple fact is that I do every single time Mrs. Lion wants to spank me. It’s a painful, humiliating activity that always turns me on to think about and that I willingly accept.

If you believe that magic is the power of apparently influencing the course of events by using mysterious or supernatural forces, the force that ineluctably draws me to my doom must be magical. I am powerless to resist it. I welcome it and help maximize the pain I accept. It’s a powerful force. Even when I am screaming in pain it holds me fast in position. A hand, gently pushing on the small of my back creates a force field locking me in range of the paddle beating me.

Is this force sexual? Is it the way my brain is wired to associate the pain of punishment with sexual arousal? I suppose it must be. All I know is that even though I dread the pain I know is coming, I’m aroused when I picture myself naked, bottom exposed, waiting for the next swat.

If I stayed hard throughout the punishment, it would be fair to say that I am turned on by being punished. But I don’t. My erection disappears, not to return, once the spanking is only a few swats in. It’s as though I am turned on as a way to get me naked and in position. Once I am safely ready for beating, the arousal disappears and I experience the pain of retribution.

That has to be magic.


  1. Author

    You describe this beautifully! I share many of the same feelings. I fantasize about spanking all the time…and yet, when I am actually getting a spanking all I want is for it to stop because it hurts so much! And yet, I willingly allow my husband to discipline me when he deems necessary…

    1. Author

      It’s amazing. For me, it’s especially humiliating to willingly expose my bottom for a beating.

      1. Author

        Agreed! Sometimes, when I am made to wait in position, bare bottom raised for my spanking…I can’t help but wonder why I would subject myself to such a thing… 🙂

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