By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

It’s been a long month. Both of us have been sick. I was determined to go to work today. Lion insisted I stay home. As much as I hate to admit it, he was right. I spent most of the morning asleep. I was hungry and swore it had to be somewhere around 11. Nope. It was 12.

Another side effect of being in and out of sleep is that television shows just blend together. Watching a marathon of the same show, it seems like there’s one murder and the conclusion hours later doesn’t make much sense.

Lion has had his cough for at least three weeks. He spent a lot of time snoozing while watching TV. He still has his cough although it’s not really knocking him out anymore. He actually made it to work today.

Needless to say, we didn’t play last night. I was too wiped out from the day’s activities. We snuggled for a bit, but my cough made that short lived. I don’t foresee any play tonight either. There are two ways to look at it. Maybe taking a mini break will help with Lion’s broken-ness. However, it might also make him less horny as the days go on. Absence doesn’t always make the cock grow fonder.

Unfortunately Lion’s first orgasm of the new year was a ruined one. I’m not even sure if he counts those. [Lion — I counted it.] I wouldn’t. Since we don’t have a schedule anymore and I’m sick, I don’t have any idea when his next orgasm will be. I’m hoping it will be soon. I’d like to erase the memory of the ruined orgasm from his mind. I can’t see it happening till at least the weekend. Maybe I’ll be feeling better by then and Lion will be done being broken. Only time will tell.

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Male Chastity

Enforced male chastity is about controlling how often a man gets to ejaculate. Right? I think we can agree that it is, atleast, a big part of it. By extension, the way we know that control is being exercised is by reducing the number of orgasms a man has to a number well below what he would have if unlocked. Right? I’m not so sure.

I got thinking about this after a comment from Savanah:

“Well, at having an average of more than one orgasm a week, you fit the norm of an average uncaged, unchastised middle aged married person – once per week.”

My average wait in 2016 was 6.5 days. That’s pretty close to the average Savanah mentions. If she’s right, I would have come about 52 times last year. My actual number was 58. Based on that average, I had more orgasms than the average uncaged guy. Based on my pre-enforced-chastity experience, I had less orgasms before we started. Is wearing a chastity device the secret of having more sex, at least for me?

Yup, it was. The reason is pretty simple. Before we started enforced chastity, we avoided sexual contact. There were a lot of long standing negative feelings that got in the way of physical love. When we agreed to begin enforced chastity, one stipulation was that Mrs. Lion would periodically unlock me for teasing or for a full orgasm.

It turns out that Mrs. Lion really likes making me come. With the old baggage removed, she got into indulging that pleasure. She tempered it so that I would spend a reasonable (for her) amount of time frustrated and horny. More often than not, after an average of 6.5 days, she would get me off.

Based on my reading of other enforced chastity blogs, I am enjoying a virtual plethora of orgasmic delight. Many guys can count their annual orgasms on one hand. Before enforced chastity, I got most of my orgasms with one hand. [Mrs. Lion – He still does. It’s just my hand now.] Are we doing it wrong? Have I inadvertently stumbled on a steel aphrodisiac? Does that cage make my penis (I know, her weenie.) irresistible? In one sense it does.

Think about it. She now owns it. She calls it her weenie. It is her toy; put away safely in a steel cage between uses. I’m completely out of the picture. I can’t even get an erection unless she wants to take her toy out for some playtime. Mrs. Lion likes her toy. I think she also likes the fact that she is in control of it. How often she plays with it and lets it ejaculate has nothing to do with me, at least from her perspective.

When I proposed enforced chastity, I didn’t have fantasies of excruciatingly long waits between ejaculations. That never really occurred to me. I imagined myself incredibly horny, crazy for release and relief. I imagined Mrs. Lion as a strict disciplining wife who spanked me and, at her whim, gave me orgasms. Obviously, my fantasy mixed two completely different kinks: enforced chastity and domestic discipline. Hey, it was my fantasy. I could have also included bread making in it too if I wanted.

So, for me, the point of all this is control. Perhaps that begs the question. Is the way to exercise control as a keyholder, forcing the male into longer and longer waits? I can’t deny that is certainly one very strong way to demonstrate it. Most guys in this sort of situation seem to have the Stockholm syndrome. They push their partners to extend their waits longer and longer. It becomes a challenge for them, not very different from the one runners feel when they try to make their next run longer than the last.

I’m no runner. I like my orgasms. I don’t think that I’m less of a caged male than the guys who come once every couple of months. I am well aware that I’m having a lot more sex than I did before enforced chastity. I like that. Who wouldn’t?

Now that we are starting our fourth year of enforced chastity, I’ve been thinking about that 6.5 day average. Is it a tad too frequent? I think it might be. The way we got to that 6.5 day number is mathematical averaging of all my waits. Occasionally the wait was only a day or two. Other times, generally when I was under the weather, it extended to a high of 15 days. Most of the time it was 6 days.

If we changed that to seven days, I would get an orgasm on the same day most weeks. If Mrs. Lion  adopted this, say making Saturday Orgasm Day, then if she decided to not give me one on a given Saturday, I would expect to wait until the following Saturday, and so forth. That’s not to say she couldn’t provide a mid-week ejaculation, but it would, like punishment days, provide a semi-predictable day for getting off with occasional improvisations. My typical wait would be 7 days with occasional, possibly frequent, 14 and 21 day waits.

I admit that this idea could be something I could learn to regret if Mrs. Lion decides to adopt it. In one sense, I agree with Savanah; I’m probably getting a bit more than I should. But then I’m ignoring the most important thing about my enforced chastity: It’s all up to Mrs. Lion. I don’t get to decide anything when it comes to my sex life. Time for me to shut up.

 

By:
In: Edging, Ruined orgasm, Spanking

Since Lion has been broken (his word, not mine), I’ve found it harder to read him. I got pretty good at seeing the changes in his face and the rest of his body to know when he was getting close. Recently, he doesn’t behave the same way. I don’t think it’s a conscious thing on his part. He never knew he made any faces or other movements.

Last night we were merrily getting him toward the edge when he suddenly opened his eyes and stared at me. I asked what was wrong and he said nothing was wrong. Then he started to get soft again. That, I understand. It was a lapse in concentration. It happened at least one other time last night. I brought out the Magic Wand and a few minutes later he had a ruined orgasm. I knew he was getting close. I just didn’t think he was that close. And I didn’t even realize he was coming until it was too late to salvage.

I hate ruined orgasms almost as much as Lion does. Lion says they hurt. To me, they are a waste. I don’t use them as discipline, although I did purposely go for them a few times to see if I could get the timing correct. I think I read somewhere that some women use them as punishment because it’s all the cum of an orgasm with none of the thrill. While I do want the cum, I don’t want Lion to suffer for it.

Lion is wondering why he can’t stay hard. I think he’s worried about being broken. If 90% of sex is in the brain, then that could account for it. He’s thinking so much about getting hard and staying hard that he sabotages himself. Maybe he thinks “now I’ve got it” and his subconscious says “not so fast”. I’m not really worried about him. We’ve been down this road before. Eventually the pendulum swings in the other direction and he can’t keep himself from getting hard.

I was thinking of giving Lion a play spanking too. I almost told him if he could keep himself out of trouble, he could have a play spanking tonight. Since today is punishment day, it seemed fitting to have some sort of spanking. Then I thought it might be too much pressure on him, both last night and today. Last night because he might talk himself out of getting to the edge, and today because he might accidentally break a rule and need an actual punishment spanking. So, I decided to give him the play spanking last night.

I’m not sure I did a very good job of it though. I did get his cheeks nice and rosy, but my shoulder was starting to give out. He said he liked it. Apparently it wasn’t enough to keep him turned on if he couldn’t stay hard. It’s been quite a while since I’ve done a play spanking. I guess I’m out of practice.

Maybe the key is to go back to basics. Maybe he should have more play spankings and other kinds of play. If I pay more attention to him, we’ll get him through his broken stage. I don’t think Lion will argue with that line of reasoning.

By:
In: Keyholder, Lion's Journal

Here we are at the start of yet another year. I don’t feel particularly interested in sex. Too bad. A new year should be greeted by sex; or at least the desire for sex. One of our readers asked a question for our “He Said / She Said” post next week. But the question is really just for me. He wanted to know if I, like him, feel let down and sorry about being caged after I have an orgasm. I don’t.

I get annoyed about being in a chastity device on days when I have been orgasm-free for a while. It’s not that I want the device off so I can jerk off. It just feels unnecessary. Case in point: last night. Mrs. Lion is sick. She has the same rotten cold that I had (have). She was in no mood for doing anything sexual for me. She wanted to sleep if she could stop coughing. I absolutely get it. Then why would I feel grumpy and want out of my cage?

It isn’t that I’m a brat and want to pout because I didn’t get teased. For a while I thought that was what was going on. I realized that while I missed the sexual contact, I fully understood the reason and felt fine about it. The real problem for me is much harder to describe and understand. I’ll try to explain.

My enforced chastity fantasy is about Mrs. Lion locking me up without regard to whether or not I want it or not. Ok, that should mean that I had my dream last night. I was locked and my lioness ignored my plight. In one sense that’s absolutely right. My pr0blem had to do with my expectations. Mrs. Lion has been saying (and writing) that I would have a New Year’s Eve and a New Year’s Day orgasm. I requested that maybe just one of those would be enough.

So, last night I expected that she would at least tell me that she knew there was supposed to be some promised sex, but she didn’t feel well enough to follow through. That would have given me a sense of being remembered. But when the entire night went by without a word, I felt bad. It was obvious that she wasn’t well enough to do anything. I had no expectation of activity. It may be silly, but I wanted her to remember.

There have been many times when I expect an orgasm but end up being edged. That never makes me feel cheated. It’s part of the game. In fact, if instead of a New Year’s orgasm, I just get teased, I would be fine. I think I might even like it. It’s a show of Mrs. Lion’s power. For me, enforced chastity is about power, not sex. So, if last night I was told there would be no teasing, that would be a perfectly fine part of the game.

We had another talk about wait times. In her post, Mrs. Lion pointed out that if I came every 14 days, I would have 26 orgasms this year. I don’t know why she picked that interval. Twenty-six isn’t a magic number. We never set a goal. Many couples do, with the keyholder announcing an annual maximum number of orgasms for the year.

Mrs. Lion says she doesn’t care about things like that. But her post yesterday cited my total for 2016. Her original post said “about 57 orgasms.” I edited it to get rid of the “about.” Actually, we both had it wrong. I had 58 which turns out to be the exact average she was calculating. I think she is influenced by our readers who frequently say I get too many orgasms. As she wrote, I do lose interest after a while. If I go much past two weeks, I am harder to edge and not all that interested in sex. It’s just how I am wired.

There’s another factor: how orgasms feel to me. An orgasm after a wait of less than 10 days feels way better than one after two weeks or longer. Something happens physiologically with me that makes an orgasm after a very long wait almost hurt. It’s not that I don’t want it. Somehow it changes. The answer isn’t to assure my waits are two weeks or less. It’s just that after a long wait, a second orgasm four-days-to-a -week later will feel amazing. This begs the question of whether my keyholder should care about such things.

I don’t think she should. The only reason I mention it is because I wonder if you have the same experience. Is it how we males are wired, or is it just something about me?

I like that I never know (unless she writes about it here) when my next orgasm is coming. Mrs. Lion is really good about keeping me guessing. She is a great keyholder.