Then And There

lion's spanked butt
The sign of good demisineering. Mrs. Lion spanked me last night. She took my advice to heart. This is the result 3 hours after she finished. It still hurts. (Click image for full, painful size)

In my role as a demisineer ( {dee-mize-in-ear} Someone who engineers his own demise.), I am obligated to help Mrs. Lion become more effective as my disciplining wife. I’m also required to help her make my enforced chastity more effective. Demisineering is certainly a counter-intuitive occupation.  Not only that, but a demisineer often finds himself accused of topping from the bottom. There are also demisineers who are disciplining wives themselves. One of them, Susan, wrote this comment about delaying punishment yesterday. She was responding to another reader who said that anticipating a punishment is as bad as the punishment itself.

Sorry guys but you are confusing punishment with results.I agree that stretching out the time until a punishment occurs can add mental anguish to the pain in your tush. But if she wants to bring about behavior change she should spank immediately or as close to the offense as possible even if she has to remove him from the room as I have done with my husband. The problem is the male mind sees future punishment as abstract and too far in the future to take seriously. But they take it very seriously if you take their pants down on the spot and they remember that better too.

She has a point. In fact, her comment explains why just wearing the training collar changes my behavior. The certainty of immediate punishment gets and keeps my attention. My behavior improves because I know that any slip will result in a painful shock then and there; even in public. Reacting to the shock is humiliating since others are bound to notice me jump and yelp.

We have punishment days. Each Monday and Thursday are designated as when Mrs. Lion can punish me for accumulated sins. The idea behind this was to provide Mrs. Lion specific opportunities to punish. She was feeling overwhelmed by the need to punish any day I misbehaved. Very often on punishment day, I forget why I am being punished. Even if I remember, I have to admit that I don’t really associate the punishment with the crimes. As Susan said, it feel abstract. I don’t know if this is a male trait, but it’s true for me. I don’t like the punishment and I want to avoid it, but I don’t really associate it with what I did wrong.

Once, in the supermarket, Mrs. took me into the family bathroom, had me pull down my pants and underpants, and then spanked me. She was very uncomfortable doing this. We both worried that people would hear her swats and my reaction. She never wants to repeat that experience. We both agreed that immediate spanking in public places was something we didn’t want to do.

We now have a solution for this problem: the training collar. I am required to wear it whenever we are away from home. Unless I forget to put it on, which I did the other day, all Mrs. Lion has to do is open the phone app and zap me. That problem is solved. At least it is if Mrs. Lion zaps me each time I break a rule.

There’s no doubt that spanking is the preferred punishment in our house. As she wrote in her post yesterday, Mrs. Lion is coming to realize that waiting for punishment day for spanking isn’t as effective as she hoped. I agree. If we are alone at home, a spanking at the time of the offense is certainly possible. Mrs. Lion simply has to decide to do it. I think that choice would be the most effective in changing my behavior (my expert demisineering advice).

What about those zaps when we are out? Should that be the extent of the punishment? That has to depend on how serious my offense was. The immediate punishment certainly underlines her displeasure with what I did. But what if I do something serious like interrupting her?  She always has the option of zapping me and then telling me there will be a spanking too when we go home. That double whammy might prove  even more effective.

There is one other issue about delayed punishment: What if I accumulate more than one offense? Our current practice is for Mrs. Lion to administer a single spanking that covers all of the accumulated misdeeds. She makes the spanking more or less severe based on the quantity and severity of the offenses. I get it.

But I have to admit that this doesn’t do much to change my behavior. The spanking, regardless of severity, sends me a message that Mrs. Lion is unhappy with what I did. It doesn’t really deter me from specific behaviors. I think that each offense needs its own punishment. This also speaks to the benefits of spanking close to the offense. Adopting this will be more work for Mrs. Lion and a lot more painful for me. I believe that at this point in our DD marriage, this is a positive step. Who knows? If I do a better job associating punishment with the misbehavior, I will earn less spankings.


  1. Author

    I must admit that I did get a little aroused when I saw those red marks on your butt.

  2. Author

    My wife started with an exponential increase for each infraction. 1, 2, 4, 8, 16 etc. Then one day she said 20 for every infraction. That wasn’t good as I had 8 infractions. But then 20 became 40. Sometimes punishment lasts a long time.

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