The Internet is famous for discussions ad-nauseum about definitions. It sort of makes sense. In a medium composed of words, the meaning of nouns can define some people. In our particular little corner of the kink world, there is no clear agreement on the exact meaning of enforced chastity or female led relationships (marriage).
For example, is someone practicing enforced chastity if he isn’t wearing a locking chastity device? Does the word “enforced” refer to physically restraining the penis or does it mean that someone other than the man wearing the penis control what it does?
A couple of years ago, I would have argued that the locking device is essential for enforced chastity. After all, without this hardware, cheating is easy and not easy to detect. So, if there is a trust issue, then enforced chastity requires physical restraint. If mental control is sufficient, the enforcement doesn’t need the hardware.
Of course, a lot of us like the idea of wearing a chastity device. It’s hot. It’s what we fantasized about before actually doing it. Mine has been off for a few weeks now. I like the freedom. I also enjoy the unrestrained erections that come my way. I’ve been thinking about whether I should discuss this with Mrs. Lion. I like being wild, but the cage does prevent those erections. I have a concern. My new job requires business casual dress. Until now, I wore jeans and the cage was invisible. I’m not so sure it won’t show up with Dockers. Of course we can test and see if Mrs. Lion wants me locked up.
Sometimes it’s hard to separate what is essentially a bondage fetish from the actual practice of enforced chastity. Let’s face it, most of the guys wearing chastity devices are doing it because they find it a turn on; Ironic, but true. I do like bondage and wearing the cage is certainly penis bondage.
Whether or not I am wearing the Jail Bird, I am under enforced chastity. I can get in a touch here or there, but I am absolutely not going to masturbate. As far as I can tell, being wild permits me to make things worse for myself. If I do any self-stimulation I know I can’t really continue beyond starting to get hard. I just can’t. I know I’m not allowed to touch myself sexually. So, I don’t.
Knowing I could masturbate is way harder to handle than knowing I am physically prevented from doing it. The device takes any choice out of my chastity. Without it, I am willingly obeying because I have surrendered my sexual pleasure to my keyholder. The real key, after all, isn’t the one that unlocks the hardware; it’s my surrender to my lioness.