We Didn’t Plan On This

We got home last night around dinner time. We weren’t hungry though. By the time we got somewhere we could have lunch is was almost 3pm, so we watched some TV and had a small bite around 9. I’ve been uncaged the last five days. I’m writing this on Tuesday night. Per my rules, I am naked but still uncaged. Mrs. Lion has assured me that this condition will be corrected tonight. On Monday night, after a surprisingly strong spanking (for fun: hers), Mrs. Lion edged me once. She tried again, but I just wasn’t staying hard. This is a fairly new occurrence. I generally lose my erection after a ruined (or full) orgasm, but stay hard when teased or edged. The cause is most likely my worry over our current situation. I had an interview last week, but the hiring manager still hasn’t completed interviews due to the holiday, so no answer yet. If this latest change isn’t situational, it may be part of a more general change.

Even though I have been uncaged, nothing has changed in my sexual behavior. I am not getting more erections nor am I inclined to do any illicit playing, even in the shower. True, it’s only been a few days since my last orgasm, but normally I am very interested in coming by now. I could be conditioned away from informal arousal. Wearing a chastity device for eighteen months is bound to have some effects on me. I seem to have learned that I don’t own my arousal and am close to unable to get turned on without Mrs. Lion providing direct stimulation. This wasn’t a goal either of us expressed before or during my enforced chastity. As I think about it, I shouldn’t be surprised.

The big question in my mind is where is this leading? Will I permanently require my lioness to directly stimulate the penis before I can get erect? Is this something she wants? I’m very sure she has no intention of training me this way. But my arousal and ejaculation does belong to her. It seems the penis is now truly her toy and not mine. I can see that many guys would consider this to be the most desirable outcome of enforced chastity. I’m not sure I do. But I’m also not sure I don’t. The fact is that I have no choice. This conditioning wasn’t planned. It just happened.

Of course, I might be wrong and most of my problems with arousal are caused by the financial problems we are having. Some of this has to be due to my worry. But a lot of it is the result of a pattern we have maintained for a year and a half. In that time I have either been physically unable to stimulate myself due to the chastity device, or under direct supervision where playing with myself would be greeted with punishment.  Even now, sitting at my desk without a cage, and writing about arousal, I have absolutely no desire to play with it.

This doesn’t upset me at all. After thinking about it for a while I realize that this is exactly what I asked for and what Mrs. Lion has enthusiastically embraced. This un-submissive lion has very submissively surrendered even the ability to get hard without his lioness explicitly wanting it hard. I’m either discovering my true nature or I’m the poster lion for behavioral conditioning.

What do you think?