Yesterday, along with you, I learned that “ok” from Mrs. Lion doesn’t mean “yes,” it just means that she heard what I said. So, now my understanding of how coupons and extra days work is incorrect.  That’s fair enough. Since I have the coupons and whatever redemption rules she finally settles on, I can still elect to keep them in the drawer. The question I ask myself is why it is so difficult sometimes. Take wait times; I don’t necessarily remember every date, but I have a calendar that works on my phone and computer. So, I create an appointment called “O”. If “O” is on 9/9, I see it on my phone as coming up. If Mrs. Lion adds a week, I simply update my calendar to show 9/16. Mrs. Lion can see my calendar too. Her phone should be syncing with my calendar. No memorization needed. I am happy to take on the job of remembering the next time I get to come. Trust me, I don’t need the calendar. I count the days.

I don’t think that Mrs. Lion thinks I would lie to her. I wouldn’t. I was concerned I could make a mistake about the dates. That’s why I make an entry on the calendar. As she likes to remind me, I asked to be caged, so it is fair that I do the bookkeeping since she finds that difficult. The frequency of “O” dates seems to be decreasing. That further enhances my memory. We had talked about this issue of tracking rewards and punishments. That’s why I printed the Good Lion and Naughty Lion coupons. No memory at all is needed. Write one up and stick it to the fridge. We both see them until cashed in. When I got those hard swats last week, Mrs. Lion took the coupon and tore it up. Case closed.

It’s true that a lot of caged males like elaborate rule systems and games to add interest to their chastity. I am not interested in that. I suggested the longer penalty wait time, for example, because one day just isn’t a deterrent to me. If Mrs. Lion prefers to add only a day, that’s completely up to her. She won’t have to remember the new date. I will. It will appear on her calendar. It’s my job to do the paperwork.

Sometimes it seems to me that caging me is just too much work and trouble for Mrs. Lion. She regularly writes about how difficult it is to remember dates, think of things to do , etc. Her post yesterday highlights how much trouble locking me up has become. I keep thinking that things are getting easier and that we are evolving into a sustainable way of life that, at least to date, has improved our sex life. I also thought that she liked my suggestions about coupons. Wrong on both counts.

As I wrote months ago when we started this adventure, it won’t work unless both of us get something from it. Now, seven months later, I am the only one benefiting. That makes me feel thoughtless and selfish. It makes me want to stop. I don’t want to be trouble or an inconvenience to Mrs. Lion. I want to make her life better, not harder. I’ve learned that “ok” doesn’t mean “yes.” I am learning that “yes” doesn’t mean “I want to do this.”

Mrs. Lion is right. I have been designing how my chastity will go. She noted that and said that it is up to her. She’s right, it is. However, inaction isn’t the same as making the rules. That doesn’t mean she is obligated to create a lion rule book that rivals the NFL in its excruciating detail. It does mean that there are some rules that she wants to enforce. It means that we work together to help her to handle the problem of remembering dates. For me to want to continue, I do need to feel that there is something in this for her. Otherwise, I think the cage should come off.


  1. Author

    Re: maybe it’s time to stop: MC is a practice that can be put aside for awhile and then picked up again later, especially if both partners are not into it. I find that it primarily helps me manage my expectations, 3 weeks on and then one week’s rest.

  2. Author

    Thanks for the suggestion. We’ve committed to continuing our adventure for another year and a half. I guess it’s natural to feel frustration from time to time. Mrs. Lion and I are pretty good at working things out even if we start out with crossed wires.

  3. Author

    As my my wife says, games take the control away from her and, after all, Chastity is about handing over control of your orgasms to her. She has a very good point. The other thing I read often is that men claim to become better husbands when denied orgasms. My smart wife pointed out that few wives want their husbands to be better because they are being forced to by using sex as a weapon.

    She also does not place any significance on a chastity device. In fact she feels that it takes more self control to be chaste without one. However, I am weak so once she started having me go 2-3 weeks, I told her that I needed help from time to time. So I bought a CB6000s and wear it as needed. Mostly I am the one deciding to lockup but my wife sometimes tells me too, especially after my orgasm. She says it is important to re-establish the dynamic quickly. I am my own key holder and my word is good enough for my wife.

    1. Author

      Some of us (me) really love being caged. It gives me the feeling that all choice is removed. I love that. It’s my kink.

  4. Author

    We have been stopping and starting for the last 12 months. It is a sex game for us, not a lifestyle. We do not think that my orgasms are bad. In fact at my age I should be having more, not less as I never know if the last one will truly be the last. If we are not having fun, we stop and do something else.

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