Monday night Mrs. Lion gave me oral sex. As usual, it felt wonderful. She promised me an orgasm, and I got it. It felt odd. The buildup was incredibly fast. I could feel muscles contracting and sensation growing. I never felt the contractions of semen being emitted. It felt good but not exactly complete. I’m confused. Mrs. Lion suggested that it might be that I waited 12 days. I’ve waited longer than that and ejaculated. Whatever the cause, Mrs. Lion was a little disappointed. I was too.
I’m not sure that I want to pursue this medically. Maybe I need to use the EMS machine and consistently exercise my pelvic floor (Kegels). I think we need to do some experimenting. On Monday night, I suggested that Mrs. Lion goes for the gold without any BDSM or other foreplay. I was tired and not sure that I wanted much activity. Maybe that was a signal from my body that I wasn’t ready. I thought that if Mrs. Lion could get me hard and get me to orgasm, it didn’t matter how I felt before she started.
I never gave much thought to any of this. I didn’t think that my sexuality was particularly complicated. I think that women believe male sexuality is the simple process of stimulation, erection, and ejaculation. That was true of me when I was younger. I can’t help wondering if my difficulty in having a full orgasm is pathology or a normal part of aging.
Either way, I’ll have to learn how to live with this new reality. I wonder if it’s related to foreplay. I don’t think Mrs. Lion could have gotten a different result if she had edged me. The sensations were wrong. It wasn’t her. It was all me. Do you have similar experiences? Please let me know.