Aren’t You Tired of Hearing It?

Every day I say the same old blah blah. I’m going to do this. I didn’t do it because of that.

I’m tired of saying it.

Are you tired of hearing it?

One of the reasons I stopped giving Lion “coming attractions” is that I couldn’t follow through. Another reason is that I was tired of writing about failing yet again.

I really did try last night. I brought out the plastic clothespins. There were five pinks, two white and a greenish one. I managed to put them all on Lion’s balls. The pink ones were in a stripe up the middle. The two white ones were flanking the base of his penis, and the greenish one went at the top of the line of pink ones. I was jerking him off along the way, and he was hard and having fun. But the dog was annoying us. She has been cooperating lately by curling up on the floor by my feet. She’s still in the way but not annoying. Last night, she was annoying. She had to have my hand in her mouth. She had to have her paw on my leg. I was even trying to distract her with a grabber I use to pull her bowl out of her crate so I can feed her.

Finally, I gave her a treat and locked her out of the bedroom. Lion was somewhat soft again, and I battled back to a hard weenie. The dog was whining and banging on the door. Eventually, we figured out that she had opened Lion’s office door and then closed herself in. She was frantic to get out again. So much for Lion sexy time. We tried. We really did. We managed to get a good start, but no happy ending. I’m not sure he would have had a happy ending anyway. I was just trying to edge him.

Tonight, we’ll try again. (I never learn. I’m promising again.) Maybe we’ll do clothespins again. Maybe it will be IcyHot. Maybe it will be the rope or even the Magic Wand. I do know that the damn dog will be tethered on her leash, away from us.

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