Mrs. Lion has set up a generous play schedule for me. She doesn’t expect that I will want play three times a week. But if I do, the time is available. That’s incredibly kind of her. She must really love me to be willing to do that. Of course, I know she does.

Actually, playtime requires both of us to be in the mood. Since it is for my benefit, I need to want it. But then, so does Mrs. Lion. She needs to have the energy and interest to put in the considerable effort our play takes. The classic approach to BDSM play is a little different; just a little. Typically, the top and bottom make a play date. They agree on a time and place for the fun.

After marriage, the concept of dating, any kind of dating, can vanish. Living together makes it too easy to take one another for granted. In my case, that has usually resulted in BDSM play slowly fading into a fond memory. “Play” is something you do in your spare time. Right? Work, family, chores, shopping, etc. come first.

Obviously, survival issues must take precedence. Dealing with children and pets are strong seconds. I can’t argue with that. But aren’t your needs and the needs of your partner priorities too? Of course they are. Mrs. Lion and I always put each other first. Sadly, that doesn’t translate into making time for fun things.

Until now, play is sort of an afterthought. We do it when we have nothing else on the schedule. Usually, that’s a Saturday or Sunday afternoon when we’ve finished chores. Generally, I ask Mrs. Lion if we can play. She almost always agrees. I’m very lucky that way. But I don’t ask often.

It’s not because I don’t want to; no not at all. I just feel guilty because I know Mrs. Lion is tired and just wants to relax and disappear into her iPad. Now that she has established that we can play on Tuesdays, Fridays and Sundays, I won’t feel guilty if I end up asking. She might ask too. We only play if we both feel ready and in the mood.

This new schedule is based on our success with punishment days. When we began domestic discipline, Mrs. Lion would note an infraction and promise to punish me later. Generally, later never came. Then we set Monday and Thursday as designated punishment days. For a while, I had to keep track of my sins and report them on punishment days. Then, I would get duly chastised.

It works very well. Nowadays, Mrs. Lion rarely waits for punishment day. She just spanks me at the first convenient moment (for her!). Perhaps this will happen with play as well. In the meantime I have three chances a week for BDSM fun. How cool is that?