It is true. I’m horrible about discussing things Lion writes about. I usually read his posts when one of us is in the middle of something. Sometimes, if I interrupt what he’s doing, he gets a little perturbed. He says he can only do one thing at a time. I tried this response the other night when I was making up his pills. He wanted me to read something on the screen. I said I was doing his pills. He said I just needed to look up quickly. I guess I can do more than one thing at a time.
I realized a few weeks ago that spanking seems to have become just one more thing to add to my to-do list. Even if I catch him breaking a rule, I still have to follow up with the spanking. I surprised myself when I added the new rule about his coffee cup the other day. Why would I do that? Maybe I just reached the tipping point after having to get the cup myself yet again. Maybe I was hoping the new rule would make me more likely to spank him when he does break a rule. Maybe I just need to spank him for the hell of it to reset the spanking gene. I know he wouldn’t mind that. Well, he’d mind having a sore butt, but he’d see the rationale.
Last night, he asked why we haven’t been snuggling. I think that may have something to do with the boner juice. Maybe not. I don’t know. When I move over to snuggle, sometimes he falls asleep. Sometimes he falls asleep before I move over to snuggle. And for some reason, it feels like he’s rejecting me when either the boner juice doesn’t work or he isn’t getting turned on. Now, we’ve never been that touchy-feely after sex. We don’t settle into our after-sex glow and snuggle. He usually gets under the covers right away. We pretty much go back to our neutral corners. Why does it feel like he’s rejecting me then? I don’t know. I’m sure he’s in his own head about why it didn’t work. Maybe I just need a little reassurance that it’s not my fault he didn’t get turned on. He was worried he was broken. Maybe I’m worried I don’t turn him on anymore.
This is all speculation. I think I’ve just been in a weird mood. I’m feeling a little buried by work and chores. Learning a new thing at work always yanks the rug out from under me. Sure, I’m building on things I’ve already learned, but with an added twist of some new thing thrown in. Until I get my feet back under me, it’s like I have no idea what I’m doing all over again. As for chores, now that the antenna is on the roof and I’ve dug up most of the rocks in the yard, it’s just the regular old chores. It’s not like the list ever gets shorter. It’s just a standing order at this point. Rinse and repeat.
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