Do You Want the Good News or the Bad News?

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The dog has been an absolute beast lately. She keeps jumping on Lion and scratching him with her long nails. I bought a contraption that holds dogs for breeding. Supposedly, it holds them for grooming too. The problem is getting her into it. Not happening. I tried a few times and gave up. My next thought, now that we have our tools and hardware supplies back, is to put eyebolts in the ceiling so I can rig up some sort of pulley-like thing to suspend her in mid-air so I can trim her damn nails. I don’t think she can go to a groomer. I’m worried she’d bite someone because she’s so afraid.

Anyway, the dog spent a good portion of late afternoon into evening on her leash hooked to one doorknob or another. That afforded us the chance to play. I grabbed the Magic Wand. Sometimes, Lion reacts right away. Mr. Weenie shoots to attention. Sometimes, he doesn’t. I wasn’t sure if it would work last night. I kept going, though. I’m no quitter. Eventually, I got him to the edge. And then to the edge again. I was torn between just edging him or going for an orgasm. I figured, since I edged him a few times, an orgasm seemed like a good idea. I think Lion enjoyed it. The problem was, no cream filling. Phooey!

Lion has been doing the electronic Kegel exercises faithfully every morning. We thought they were working. Maybe they are. I guess you can’t expect fireworks all the time. We both thought edging would definitely help. You know, priming the pump. Nope. Oh well. I guess we have to keep trying. Poor Lion. It’s tough being the subject of an orgasm experiment. But I think he’ll soldier on.

What a guy!


  1. But how can you be mad at that face? 🙂

    1. Author

      She was a baby then. Now she’s 50 lbs of nutso craziness. Still cute but semi-lethal.

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