Lions are funny animals, especially mine. He swears we never discussed the “hands off the weenie” policy. If that’s true then why do I mention it during our camping trips when he idly touches himself when he’s wild? He’ll be sitting in his recliner, watching TV and his hands wander. He usually says, “Oops. Sorry.” Even at home, when he’s caged, I’ll ask him if he isn’t adjusting himself a bit much. I know he can’t get himself aroused with the cage on, but if he touches himself then, he’ll touch himself when he’s wild. It’s just a habit, I know. Maybe he needs something to do with those idle hands. I’ll have to come up with something.
The other thing he’s surprised about is the naked policy. Somehow he’s gotten it into his head that I don’t care. It’s true that I don’t mention it a lot. I think that’s because he’s usually really good at following the rule. And 1.0 may not have noticed as much as 2.0 does. But generally, Lion will have a very good reason for being dressed. If he’s mowing the lawn or will be in the front yard for any reason, of course he needs clothes on. He can grill naked since the backyard is concealed by trees and there are no neighbors close. If he’s doing anything that could be dangerous, I don’t want him naked. If we’re building furniture, for example. When he’s cooking and there may be grease spatter, I hope he wears at least a T shirt, if not his apron. And he’s allowed to have a T shirt on when he’s cold. I may want him to have blue balls, but not because he’s cold.
I guess Lion needs more reinforcement of the rules. Or, more correctly, more acknowledgment of the rules. When he’s naked I’ll need to thank him for being in uniform. When he keeps his hands to himself I’ll need to thank him for not touching. It makes sense. I hate when people only tell me what they see me doing wrong, but never what I do right. The same is true of Lions. 2.0 needs to see the good and not just the bad. Maybe when she figures that out she’ll be 2.1. Just a minor upgrade.
I have promised Lion more sling time this weekend. He’s really hooked on it. I haven’t decided if I should slather his balls with menthol rub again or use some of the tons of ginger we have in the fridge. Maybe both. Plus, we just got a Wartenberg wheel. A restrained Lion would be a good test for that. So many possibilities.