No More Orgasms

Believe it or not there are guys who want to remain locked in their chastity devices and never have an orgasm again. In once sense this surprises me, but in another I can understand this desire. Now, males of most species are sexual opportunists. When a sexually available female is around, they get horny and want sex When none are available, sex drops off the radar. Research has shown that while male mammals do get horny even without females around, most just live with the feeling and let their erections die of neglect. Humans can masturbate and most guys, including me, do that quite a bit in our lifetimes. Most of us limit the number of times we jerk off. We do this because it just isn’t that much fun. A partner or some other stimulus is needed to really get the juices going.

Those of us who are caged have lost the ability to take matters into our own hands. We get release when our keyholders decide to provide it. Over time, many keyholders gradually increase the interval between orgasms. Many caged males get one orgasm a month if they are lucky. Some get one or two a year. They learn to accept this as their wait times gradually increase over the course of months or years. An extra day or two added to the typical wait time isn’t so bad, is it? It isn’t. My last few wait times have been about nine days. The current one is ten. I don’t know if Mrs. Lion planned that, but I accept that just another day won’t be so bad.

Over time those days add up and before you know it, orgasms come less frequently than the seasons. The males accept this and even appear to enjoy the wait and anticipation. But something else may be going on that neither the male nor his keyholder considered. The longer the wait, the more buildup to that fateful day. The orgasm is spectacular. But then the realization sets in that there won’t be another for months. This can be a very depressing prospect to a guy right after he has had release. It doesn’t take long for him to realize that it is way easier for him to never have another orgasm than to deal with the depressing thought of waiting all that time for the next one. The pain of knowing just how much of your life will pass before the next one can be serious. If there is no hope of a “next one” then you can start to forget just how much you like it.

A keyholder who combines long waits with regular teasing, never lets her male forget what he is missing, so he will want his orgasm despite knowing how painful the wait will be. His keyholder won’t let him forget what he is missing. This can lead to a pretty depressed caged male. The keyholder will probably assume that the orgasm caused the depression and will have an incentive to make him wait even longer so she can avoid dealing with his depression. Soon the teasing will stop too and the male will be suffering enforced celibacy. The keyholder never intended to shut him off for life, but she unwittingly started a vicious cycle that ends with an unhappily celibate male.

A lot of men don’t know what’s good for them and will encourage their keyholders to train them to wait longer and longer. The process may take years, but eventually they end up truly celibate. Enforced chastity is consensual, but consent doesn’t imply that the caged male has agreed to permanently lose his ability to come. In fact, the male will unwittingly bring this upon himself by encouraging his keyholder to make him wait longer and longer.

So what is a reasonable wait time? This will vary by individual, but it should never be so long that the male is depressed after he ejaculates because he knows it will be a long time before his next chance. In the beginning, this may make wait times three or four days (never less). Later, this can be extended to a month or more. However, to avoid this vicious cycle, if the keyholder has made the male wait for a long time (at least a month), then his next wait time should be much shorter; a week or two.

Variety is the spice of life and that is true of wait times. Based on my reading, most men will get desperately horny after about ten days and will probably not be depressed once they come. Even if they insist they want to go much longer, it is probably healthier to train them to a ten-day-to-two-week wait, with only an occasional long wait thrown in for the fun of it.

Just as in other power exchanges, the bottom is almost always interested in going further than it is safe. The same is true of wait times. Yes, a guy can come just once a year, but ultimately he will be depressed after that orgasm. If you want a happy male, regular, not-too-frequent orgasms will give you the control he wants and protect him from the emotional lows of post-orgasmic depression.


  1. Author

    Wise words, I liked your thoughts very much. I enjoy denial with teasing for a 10 day stretch each month. The rest of the time is regular vanilla sex. I’ve never experienced post-orgasm depression and neither I nor my wife have noticed any difference in my attentiveness to her needs whether we are doing vanilla or T&D.

  2. Author

    Yes, I can believe that there are men who want to never orgasm again. I am in the position of really feeling like I do not want to ever get to have an orgasm on my own again. And, since my wife is asexual that leaves me never having another orgasm again.

    For me, masturbating is a response to physical urges, and while it feels good in the moment, afterwards is another story. The issue is not about being depressed because of how long it will be until I get to do it again. Instead it is a crash of emotions: guilt, self-loathing and disgust. Why I can’t have more self control, why am I cheating on my wife, being selfish… and on and on.

  3. Author

    I am in an asexual marriage as well, like PA Locked. I too think that M is overrated, and not worth having because of those after feelings. I decided that permanent self locking was for me. I do not want an O ever again, at all. Being permanently locked in a chastity cage is way more fulfilling than I thought.

    The psychological rush of knowing I have no access to myself feels amazing. Yes I have my own keys, but don’t use them. The rush just keeps increasing every day, especially when you feel like you would really like O, but you can’t.

    So you are stuck thinking about it, feeling yourself going crazy inside. I have gone hours just thinking about what can’t happen. Instead of a few seconds of “fun”, I get hours of mental(and physical stimulation) hands free, guilt free and never have to go thru the down period. I just find a way to settle myself, until it happens to me again….and again. So I say NO to O! Just saying it feels good.

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