I wondered how I would handle me if I were my keyholder. Since I have decades of topping experience, I have been through most of the pitfalls of topping, including 24/7 relationships. As a caged male, my thinking has been around my experience as the bottom and I admit I haven’t considered what it would be like to be my keyholder. Before going further, let me say to Mrs. Lion that this is not my wish list of how I want you to manage me.
One of my keyholder goals is to limit the amount of time and attention I need to pay to my caged male. Lion loves rules and discipline, but both require my time as supervisor/enforcer. I want to give him that sense of being controlled without driving myself crazy. His shock collar is my favorite tool. When we are together I can use it to remind him to behave if he does anything that bothers me. He has a few rules including not itnerupting, not touching himself, acting politely, and looking out for my comfort. If I see an infraction, I hit the “NO!’ button (the +2 red button on his remote control). This gives him the sense of control without too much bother on my part.
I don’t want to have too many rules. He won’t remember all of them and I will feel pressured to enforce them. So rather than fixed rules, he is punished if he does anything that annoys me. This way, I don’t have to bother with specific rules and he can learn on his own what will keep him out of trouble.
When it comes to keeping him locked up, I don’t give him a schedule. That wold be one more thing to discuss and remember. Instead, if I want to make a point with him, I just tell him he will wait at least another week before his penis gets out of his cage. Since he wears a Jail Bird, he can stay locked in without a hygiene break for at least two weeks if needed. Otherwise, I let him out when I feel like it. I want him to know that my toy comes out when I am in the mood and that he has nothing to say about it.
With lockup time off the table in terms of my use of it for behavior control, I depend on his shock collar and spanking for reinforcement. Lion is in full agreement with this since it fits his view of discipline. In terms of my pleasure, I expect him to make regular (daily) attempts to sexually please me. If I am not in the mood, I tell him. As his keyholder, I want him to do the work. If he fails to try on any given day, even if I don’t want sex anyway, he is punished. I want to train him to focus on me and my pleasure and not just react to rules.
I want to use his chastity to train and condition him. I don’t have fixed training goals, but rather react to his behavior and correct it as necessary to mold him to my wishes. He isn’t entirely happy with this since he likes structure, but I am happy with it and I’m in charge.
Based on my experience to date, this would be my approach to being my keyholder. I don’t necessarily want Mrs. Lion to take this too seriously. It is based on my personality and the way I prefer to top.
How would you behave as your keyholder? Want to share? Use the Contact Us page to send your ideas. I will post the best submissions as guest posts here. If you are a keyholder, how do you imagine your caged male would answer this question? Let us know.