While we may be in a FLR, Mrs. Lion’s authority does have limits. A big one is my decision whether or not to get the upcoming surgery. Unless I am sure I can get home from the hospital and make necessary visits for followup visits, I won’t do it. In almost every area of our lives, Mrs. Lion has authority and veto power. I’m very sure I will never be submissive enough to obey an irrevocable order that I feel compromises my survival.

Her last post was about my extreme concern over transportation. I drive a low, sports car. Mrs. Lion a one-ton pickup that is very high. Without some kind of assist, I can’t safely get in and/or out of either. That leaves us with a few options. We can see if a step of some sort will make entry to her truck viable. I can easily get out without the use of my right arm. We are hopeful a step of some sort will do the trick. If it doesn’t, then the only other option is for me to trade my sports car for (yuck) a small SUV that I can easily enter and exit. If that can’t happen, then I have to cancel the operation.

She’s right. I have been getting pretty agitated about the limits the loss of the use of my arm will impose on me. The reason I am so concerned is that once I get the surgery I can’t undo it. That means I will have to live with any limits I find for months. Most of those limits are what I would categorize as inconveniences. A few are more than I am willing to bear.

First among those is the inability to go to the doctor and physical therapy. Others include being unable to sleep because I don’t have the correct bed/chair, constant pain, inability to use the toilet, etc. We have been working hard to make sure I can work around my disability. I’m convinced the pain will be managed, so that is off the list as well. If I need assistance, Mrs. Lion will stay with me as long as necessary to help. Her employer is an asshole and won’t let her work from home. At this point we can afford it if she has to leave her job.

So, at this point, transportation is the hard limit for me. This weekend we will see what we will work out.


  1. Author

    i understand what your talking about, both with the limits and her employer, the limits are short term remember that, with your surgery it will be hard at first but the pain will go away, the mobility will improve in time, so dont make that the reason you dont get surgery.
    what about swapping vehicles for when you do need to go into doctors etc? its a possibility then atleast you can drive yourself when shes not able to.

    1. Author

      You could also hire a car as you need it. I do think you are over thinking this, if you where in an accident you would just have to tough it and take what comes.

      I have a close friend who had this surgery 2 years a go he never made any of the adjustments to his living arrangements that you are contemplating. He made a full recovery and is now pain free, he was 54 when he had the surgery. Pre op he was in constant pain and it was getting worse. Just remember these injuries rarely get better on their own usually much worse. Good luck whatever your decision.

      1. Author

        Thanks for the info and good wishes. We live quite far from the city. Hiring a car is unaffordable. The decision to do this is difficult because I really have a choice. The pain isn’t impossible to live with. My decision is a sort of cost/benefit thing. Is the long recuperation worth it for me? I’m sure I will go through with the surgery. I can’t see living this way the rest of my life. But there are realities in play here that could make it impossible. Stay tuned.

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