Over the last seven years, I have learned to cherish the orgasms I’m allowed to experience. For almost my entire post-pubescent life I’ve had at least one a day. A very large percentage of those daily orgasms were with partners. When one wasn’t available, I masturbated. I thought that this was the way to remain sexually active; you know, use it or lose it.

When Mrs. Lion lost interest in sex I tried to keep the home fires burning by masturbating at least three times a week. I wasn’t really enjoying it but felt it was important to keep the equipment in good shape. I missed sex with my lioness terribly. Then I got the bright idea of enforced male chastity. I reasoned that even if my opportunities to ejaculate were limited by wearing a male chastity device, the role of keyholder would remind Mrs. Lion to pay some sexual attention to me. Sneaky lion.

It worked. We both got into orgasm denial. At first, Mrs. Lion would unlock me every night and jerk me off. I discovered that this frequency was too much for me. Maybe the years of two-to-three-times-a-week had recalibrated me. Perhaps I was wanting to experience the frustration of having to wait. After all, that was what I expected when I asked to be locked up. Mrs. Lion was agreeable when I asked her to make me wait more than one day.

She edged me every day or two. She jerked me off a couple of times a week. Over the first three years, I rarely went more than four days between ejaculations. Then I needed shoulder surgery. I wasn’t interested in sex for over 20 days. When I felt better, my twice-a-week orgasms resumed.

Meanwhile, I changed in an unexpected (for me, at least) way. I lost interest in masturbating. On the night Mrs. Lion agreed to lock me up, I told her I had been jerking off. She was surprised. She had no idea I masturbated. I was surprised when she told me that she didn’t ever want me to do that again. Really? Every guy jerks off. No matter. She hates the idea of me getting myself off. That same night she had me jerk off while she watched. That was the last time for me.

I still don’t understand her dislike of letting me masturbate. In prior relationships when my partner was tired or not in the mood for sex, she might have me masturbate while she “helped,” usually by tickling my balls. A lot of women find watching men masturbate a fun spectator sport, not Mrs. Lion.

Because I was locked in a chastity device except when she was teasing me, I couldn’t masturbate if I wanted to. After over three years of nearly-continuous lockup, I lost interest in jerking off. I haven’t even thought about getting myself off in years. Mrs. Lion is my only sexual outlet.

In the last six months or so I ejaculate about every two weeks. I don’t think Mrs. Lion decided to extend my waits. It is harder for her to get me to the edge for about ten days after an orgasm. We both thought it was just a normal change in my sexual cycle. It might be. It may just be that it takes more stimulation (longer time) to get me to the edge. I start losing confidence that I can come and lose my erection. When Mrs. Lion persists, she can almost always get me there if she wants.

Since she stops before I get close to orgasm, when I finally get to that point after 10 – 14 days, I’m in no rush to ejaculate. I like the extreme excitement I feel when she brings me to the brink. That’s why I asked her to start the clock when she gets me that far, not before. This can push my waits to well over 20 days. She doesn’t like this very much.

Another more-tiring-for-Mrs.-Lion approach could be to try to reverse the trend and get me to the edge as soon after I ejaculate as she can. Maybe even give me orgasms as often as she can produce them. I’m certain not to love this technique very much, but maybe it can reverse the trend to longer waits that she doesn’t like.

I would guess that in the beginning, she will not get me too far for the first week or so. Over time this is bound to change. If you think that this is just a sneaky way to get more orgasms, you are wrong. The current pace is just fine with me. It’s comfortable and fun. At least, in the beginning, much more frequent ejaculation won’t be nearly as much fun for me. Eventually, I will get used to the new, more frequent pace and enjoy it. Then Mrs. Lion can make me wait 20 days again. Mean lioness!

We slept late (for us) both weekend days: 9:30 AM,this weekend. That throws us off. We end up eating breakfast at nearly 11. That means we won’t want lunch until 2, which in turn spoils dinner. When this happens, Mrs. Lion has trouble tracking time for other things, namely sexual activity for me. Today, Sunday is day 21. This is exactly a week shy of my longest wait and a week longer than my average 14 days prior to asking for more, please.

I’m not complaining, at least not yet. Since the sore appeared on my penis nearly two weeks ago, it has been too painful for me to enjoy being stimulated. Two days ago, I felt better. But when Mrs. Lion tried masturbating me, it was uncomfortable if she moved her hand to her usual jerk-off-the-lion position. Oh well.

Today (Sunday), I am almost completely healed. If Mrs. Lion is up to it, I can probably be teased. Even though it’s been three weeks since I ejaculated, a test run (edging) might be in order for at least a couple of days. Before you start writing an angry comment, I’m not topping from the bottom. We’ve both discovered that after a period of not being edged, going straight for ejaculation is less fun for both of us. It isn’t so much how long it’s been since my last ejaculation, as it is how many days of edging I’ve received that governs my reactions.

Mrs. Lion has written that maybe she will make me wait over 20 days a few times, then go to four days for a while. That way I would get used to ejaculating after just a few days. Then she would switch to over 20 again. That would make it harder for me. It makes sense, I think. It has gotten easier for me to wait longer. Even though three weeks have passed, I’m not really desperate. Part of it may be that I didn’t expect to come for three weeks.

I think a better explanation is the lack of teasing. This time it was because of the sore. Last time, it was my lack of ability to reach the edge. Once Mrs. Lion could get me really close, my interest in ejaculating grew exponentially. Perhaps the best way to decide how long to keep me waiting is to start the clock when I get within inches of the edge. Until that happens, the teasing is really fun but I am not particularly anxious to get off. Once Mrs. Lion is able to push me all the way, I start getting desperate for release.

Does that mean the four-day or twenty-day clocks don’t start until I am able to get to the edge? If so, then I have a big investment in getting that clock started.

For example, right now — the 21st day — I haven’t been to the edge once. I know I should be really horny. Intellectually, I am, but I doubt my penis will respond that way. It has “forgotten” about ejaculating. That’s the reason for all the edging. Without it, my sexual system seems to start to snooze after a while. My mind still wants sex, but my body gets a take-it-or-leave-it attitude. One good edging session changes that. All systems are go and I want to ejaculate.

If nothing happens today, tomorrow, or the next day, no big deal. I might be a little grumpy for lack of attention, but my body isn’t demanding it. As soon as Mrs. Lion gets me close to ejaculationg, things change. Each day she edges me and stops gets harder and harder to take. Last time, she got me off on the 20th day, but actually it was only the third day she got me to the very edge. Before that, I was having fun without getting too close.

I’m pretty sure that she will have no problem getting me to the edge tonight or whatever night she chooses. When she lets me ejaculate is the big, juicy question.

spankball

The NY Giants played the Dallas Cowboys. We played Spankball. The final score was 37 to 34, Cowboys on top. That was a total of 71 points. In addition there was one Giants turnover. That added up to 144 swats for me. Apparently, Mrs. Lion took my suggestion about hitting more in the lower-center of my bottom. See below.

Feminism notwithstanding, men and women are very different when it comes to sex. It’s this difference that makes it so difficult for a lot of women to understand male chastity. Of course, it’s impossible for me to know how women feel about sex since I’m male. So I’ll start with something I know very well.

We males think about sex a lot. We’re programmed that way. Male mammals are always ready to have sex. In most of the animal kingdom, all they need to do is sniff a female in heat, and off they go. Human males retain that evolutionary imperative. Sex is never very far from the top of our minds and other places. Most of us learned to masturbate before we reached high school. I learned when I was 11. Once I discovered how good it feels to ejaculate, I was hooked. From then on, getting off was something I did several times a week.

If a female was available and willing, I had the additional pleasure of sex with a partner. That’s the best! If one wasn’t available, I always had my hand. Even after I was married, I filled in between times I had sex with my wife by masturbating. I don’t think more than two or three days ever passed without ejaculation.

I believe women are different. It’s not that they don’t like sex is much as we do. Apparently, it is just not as important to them. The net result of this is that masturbation is far less interesting to most women than it is to men. I don’t like this generalization because I know several women who love to masturbate and do so far more often than I ever did. That’s not the point. I think the female attitude towards orgasm is fundamentally different than the male’s. I think that we are far more goal-oriented. We want to ejaculate as soon as we can. That’s why many men find it hard to understand why women want so much foreplay.

The point is that the male focus is on finishing. We are programmed to ejaculate. That’s how we contribute to reproduction. A female doesn’t need to have an orgasm to get pregnant. All she has to do is feel receptive to a male and allow him to finish inside her. The female orgasm is gravy. Of course, I’m speaking from the strictly reproductive point of view.

This difference in approach is programmed into us. Free will allows us to improvise and improve our sexual experiences. Modern women want and expect orgasms as a normal part of sex. It may not be necessary for reproduction, but it certainly is an important contributor to her happiness and to the success of her relationship with her mate.

male chastity exploits the difference between men and women

Keeping all of this in mind, when a man decides he’d like to play with male chastity (orgasm control), he is talking about surrendering his ability to arbitrarily decide when he will ejaculate. Since almost all of us, males that is, expect to ejaculate at will, this is a big deal. I can’t speak for anyone else, but for me, the idea of having to wait to ejaculate until Mrs. Lion decides it’s time, is very hot. This is the essence of male chastity.

She had no idea why this made any sense. She never felt the several-times-a-week urgency to orgasm the way I did. [Mrs. Lion — Never?] But if I thought it would be fun to turn over control to her she was agreeable. Locking me in a chastity device was an amusing indulgence for me. It’s true that I probably would have resisted the urge to masturbate if I wasn’t wearing a chastity device. But in the beginning, I might have jerked off in a moment of weakness. After all, it was a habit decades-old.

Wearing a chastity device made it virtually impossible for me to jerk off. Sure, I could have pulled out of the device and masturbated. But that would have been considerably more, shall we say, intentional than casually reaching down and playing with my penis. The chastity device for me was the same as Nicorette gum is for a smoker. The smoker can still have a cigarette, but the gum takes away some of the desire. The chastity device made access to my penis considerably more difficult. It deterred me.

Most people play with chastity over relatively short periods of time. The device may stay on for a weekend, a week, or even longer. It will come off and sex will resume as usual. This includes casual masturbation. That’s not what we did. Once we found a chastity device I could wear long term with comfort, I remained in it full time except for when Mrs. Lion would tease me or, if I was lucky, jerk me off. It was just too difficult for me to masturbate.

That’s a good thing. Mrs. Lion absolutely hates the idea of me masturbating. Before I asked her to lock me up, I had no idea she had strong feelings on the subject. I was a little embarrassed to admit that I did it. But I didn’t expect such a strong reaction. She told me that she had no idea that I jerked off. She let me know that she hated the idea. In that respect, she liked the idea of locking my penis in a chastity device. However, I don’t think she felt that I needed it once she told me she wanted me to stop masturbating.

self-control isn’t enough

She had a lot more faith in me than I had in myself. I thought that if I got very horny and I wasn’t locked up, I probably would have cheated now and then. As it was, I couldn’t cheat. I stayed locked up this way for over three years. The device had to come off for a few months when I got shoulder surgery. Between the pain of recovery, and the fact that I had broken the masturbation habit, I was in no danger of getting myself off. Now that we’ve been doing this seven years, it doesn’t matter if I’m locked up or not. I’ve completely forgotten how to get myself off. That may sound strange, but it’s true. I just don’t want to masturbate anymore. I’ve been trained.

the last time i jerked off was 7 years ago

In fact, since December 2013 I haven’t had an orgasm that wasn’t produced for me by Mrs. Lion. She has never allowed me to masturbate even under her supervision. She is the only source of my sexual pleasure. That is how it should be. While she doesn’t consider it as serious as having sex with another woman, getting myself off is cheating as far as she is concerned. Since she is in charge of when I get sexual release, I’ve learned to accept teasing as long as she would like to do it and I wait for ejaculation until she thinks I should get off.

She has accepted my suggestions. Maybe she accepts too many. I can ask her for an orgasm and she will quite often agree to give me one. I think that’s changing now. She is less interested in my input. I know that a lot of guys would find that disturbing to think about. I believe a lot more would find it fun. This is all possible without the hardware. I think it’s more fun for me if I’m locked into a chastity device. I recognize that nothing changes if I’m allowed to be wild.

Practicing male chastity requires a fundamental change in the sexual dynamic. With most couples, the male initiates sex. Sometimes, perhaps often, the female rejects the advances, but he makes them. It’s rare that she starts things. I know Mrs. Lion would have preferred me to be the initiator. I was never good at it. I think it all comes down to a very deep-seated fear of rejection. At least that’s how it feels to me.

With male chastity, I can’t initiate. I’m physically unable to have sex without Mrs. Lion taking action. I suppose she could train me to ask for sex. If she did that, I couldn’t even have a possibility of ejaculation unless I asked. The thing is, I would hear an awful lot of no’s. She doesn’t like to say no. I certainly don’t like to hear it. It’s not so bad if she teases me and I am panting to ejaculate when she says, “Not tonight.” That’s part of the game. I suppose being trained to ask could also be part of the game if she wanted.

Even now, after all these years, I am still a little amazed that I am turned on thinking about being prevented from getting what I want. It may be that by feeling aroused when my mate says, “No,” to ejaculation, I am being set up to be obedient to my mate. The same thing is true of spanking. Mrs. Lion punishes me with disciplinary spankings. They are painful and I don’t like them a bit. Yet, I get aroused thinking about her spanking me.

It’s that arousal I feel thinking about things that aren’t pleasant, that drives me to accept them. I get turned on thinking about Mrs. Lion denying me orgasms. It may be 20 days since the last time she let me have one and I am desperate, but I still get turned on thinking that she is going to say no and make me wait longer. Perverse, huh? Since I like bondage, wearing a chastity device has the double turn-on of being restrained and being prevented from ejaculating. A true double whammy!

When I think about it, at least for us, male chastity has brought us closer. Sex, or the lack of it, isn’t an emotional barrier or weapon in our family. It’s something that’s under the conscious control of my mate. It’s that simple. It’s fun for me, and I hope for her as well. Sure, I get to ejaculate a lot less often than I did before we started. I’m much happier.

Another month has begun. I’ve broken a record of sorts. I was healthy and sexually active in September and only had one orgasm. You can see my history since 2016 above. Overall, there is a reduction in total orgasms year to year. This wasn’t intentional. For almost all of this time, Mrs. Lion paid no attention to how long I had to wait between orgasms. In fact, she usually had no idea how long she had made me wait. She only started keeping track in September.

Until September I never expressed a preference either. That’s when I suggested that Mrs. Lion extend my wait past the 13 days that had elapsed after my August 31 orgasm. I asked her because it was difficult for her to get me right to the edge of orgasm during the first 10 days or so. This was true since July.

It wasn’t that she couldn’t get me off if she wanted. It was just that it would have taken a long time. I stayed on the arousal plateau for quite a while. Some days, my interest seemed to just drop off without warning and I would get soft. She was able to bring me back to a full erection without much trouble. It was odd that this happened. Almost magically after about 10 days, it became much easier to get me ready to ejaculate. That’s why I suggested that more time would be more fun for both of us.

It’s almost as much fun as ejaculating

I like the intense feelings when I am just about to come. Muscles tense up and I make involuntary sounds. My brain is totally focused on the impending orgasm. Then Mrs. Lion stops. I feel myself trying to keep going. I only have a few thrusts to get a release. I can’t. I start to relax. My breathing slows. Then Mrs. Lion starts again. It takes a little time but then I am back, trying to get over the edge. I can’t and she won’t help. This time she doesn’t let me calm down very much. I am still close when she gives me just a few strokes (or sucks). It’s enough to bring me right back. She stops.

Can the teasing go on forever?

This goes on until either I just can’t get back to the edge and start to get soft — Mrs. Lion says that’s when she breaks me — or she decides I’ve had enough. Usually, she doesn’t go far enough to break me. She just stops and sits up. Then she tells me in a sweet voice, “Not tonight.” I’m left sprawled across the bed with my erection flopping as I hump the air. It takes a little while for me to calm down. Then I return to my side of the bed. In a little while, Mrs. Lion locks me up again.

Yes, it’s intensely frustrating. The frustration grows each day she does it; up to a point. I can’t predict when it happens, but somewhere after 14 days I will return to the plateau and stop getting right to the edge. As soon as she unlocks the chastity device I start to get hard She has no trouble getting me aroused. I just don’t get to the very edge of that cliff. That’s not true. I get to the point that I feel my interest begin to drift away. I’m sure I’m done for the night.

Sometimes Mrs. Lion asks me if I am done. If I say yes, she might stop. Lately, she goes right back to sucking my cock. To my surprise, after a minute or two I start feeling more and more aroused. I’m heading for the edge of the cliff. Mrs. Lion knows I am and follows her usual routine of frustrating me over and over.

I’ve learned to like this teasing. Yes, I desperately want to come. I try humping her mouth. I can’t move much, so that doesn’t help. I know she likes it when I’m so frustrated. I don’t know how far into the future this dance will last. We know it works for at least 20 days.

Of course, I like to ejaculate. Mrs. Lion truly loves making me come. She likes my semen. Go figure, I sure don’t. Anyway, I know she likes making me come more than she likes frustrating me. Thank goodness! For the life of me, I can’t figure out if there is any particular logic to apply when deciding when I get to ejaculate. As of now, Mrs. Lion agreed it should be at least two weeks. My last wait was almost 3. I’m ready when she is!