I had to postpone last night’s play session. I was having a problem with the bank and I just wasn’t in the mood to torture Lion. I’m sure he thinks it would have been the perfect way to relieve stress, but I don’t think so. I have to be in a better mood to play. Tonight will be better for me. I don’t think Lion was much in the mood either. He had been awake most of the night Monday night so he was tired.

For a while I’ve been thinking about diapers and pretty Lion toes. Not together necessarily. I’m wondering if Lion sees them as punishment. I’ve never used them that way. He’s only had pretty toes once but I’ve been meaning to give him sparkly purple toes. There’s no real reason to do it other than my wanting to see his feet all dolled up. I know he hates both the diapers and the nail polish.

If I can use spanking as punishment and play, then I am assuming I can use diapers and girly toes the same way. It would just depend on the context. That’s my assumption at least. Lion may feel differently. And I don’t want to send mixed signals. Then again, if you tell a kid they can’t sleep over at Jimmy’s house because we’re all going to Grandma’s birthday party versus being grounded because he hasn’t done his homework in a week, I don’t think that’s mixing any signals. Same result for different reasons.

So Lion will have girly toes and diapers in his future. No frilly panties. They do nothing for either of us. At least the diapers and pretty Lion toes make me smile. Poor boy.

Monday night was punishment night. I was absolutely not in the mood for a spanking. I never like discipline, but Monday I just didn’t even want to think about being punished. Of course, you are thinking, so what? It isn’t up to me to be in the mood for punishment. If I don’t want to be punished, then don’t do naughty things. Right, Lion? Well, yeah. I did say to Mrs. Lion that maybe this domestic discipline stuff was a mistake. She reminded me that we did agree we could discuss that in December. I remember that it was my idea to review at the end of the year.

I had to lie down on the bed and Mrs. Lion administered her spanking. She made the swats less violent but did more of them. I had suggested that might have a more lasting effect. It was easier to take, but I couldn’t feel it an hour later. I hate to say it, but the harder swats are more memorable. Of course, the less violent spanking didn’t require me to be tied down. That might be worth the lack of lasting pain. Also, the offenses were minor: dropping some tuna salad on the table, failing to corral an ice cube squirting out of the ice dispenser, and eating first at lunch on Sunday. I did get the point. The spanking certainly hurt.

It was great that Mrs. Lion stood her ground. She was sweet about it, but made it crystal clear that I was going to be spanked. I was absolutely not in control. I didn’t have to agree to be spanked. That wasn’t in our arrangement. In the back of my mind, I thought that if I really didn’t want a spanking, I could avoid it. That, of course, is true if the spanking is for play. But clearly discipline isn’t the same at all. I knew that on an intellectual level, but deep down I figured I could escape.

Now I know; I can’t postpone or cancel punishment. Now that I think about it, this new state of affairs is the first time in my life that I have been punished in a way I don’t want to accept. This is another evolutionary breakthrough for both of us. Mrs. Lion has exercised her authority and has punished me against my will.  I have experienced involuntary punishment. I am just starting to understand that this isn’t a form of play. At some level, I had an erotic vision of domestic discipline. I don’t now. Mrs. Lion has demonstrated her control. I submitted when I didn’t want to. We are making progress. Who knew I would learn via my bum?

I took Lion’s advice last night and spanked him more times but with less force. I decreased the whompage. He still squirmed and yelled and seemed highly offended. He didn’t like the hard swats. He didn’t like the easier swats. I get the feeling he doesn’t like punishment swats. I pointed out that I am only doing what he wants me to do. That didn’t make him feel any better. He said he didn’t think his butt was as red as it was with the hard swats. Is that the point really? I don’t care how red his butt is. Sure it’s cute when it’s red and on fire. But he can’t see it so it doesn’t really matter how red it is. He needs to feel it.

His punishment list wasn’t very long and they weren’t really big mistakes anyway so it wasn’t a big punishment. I’m sure at some point in the future he’ll have something big on the list that requires both a lot of swats and hard swats. I’m positive he won’t like that. I’ll need to tie him down and stuff a sock in his mouth. He normally buries his face in the pillows so I don’t really need a sock. For a huge punishment he might need a bullet to bite. But I’m not sure I’d ever do that big a spanking. A big punishment would need a little more creativity. Something that will really stick with him. He’s been telling me that spanking is not the only way to punish him. He might get what he asked for. And then, of course, be sorry he asked for it.

Lion’s been very lucky lately in the orgasm department. Technically this wait was supposed to be fairly long, but we’re playing by my rules and even though he can’t break my rules, I can. I’ve decided whenever the whim strikes me I’ll make him come. He’s not any more or less attentive so that’s not an issue. He tries to be a good boy. It will boil down to how much pity I take on him for being horny and how much I want to taste him. Sometimes being in charge is a good thing. Other times it’s a giant headache.

Sunday night I got a bonus orgasm. Neither of us wrote about it at the time. No real reason for omitting it. I did update my “Lion Stats” on the right column. We had a great weekend and life returned yesterday. I did the laundry and reorganized the spices. We went to IKEA and bought a nice, inexpensive storage unit that we put in our dining area. It has room for most of my spices and baking supplies as well as our most used cookbooks. The bottom of the unit has room for things that have been cluttering up our kitchen counter. While money is tight, it was a very helpful purchase. Mrs. Lion did most of the assembly Sunday night and yesterday I finished up and moved the spices in.

When I find myself at home, I try to immerse myself into some useful activity. About ten  years ago, the Food Channel was just getting started and it had some great instructional programs. PBS was rerunning some of the later Julia Child programs, particularly Julia with famous bakers. So, with the help of all those famous cooks, I taught myself baking and more fancy cooking. All that intense learning took my mind off being unemployed and made for some terrific eating.  I’m not quite that carried away this time. I just filled in with grilling and smoking plus some overdue kitchen organization.

What does this have to do with FLR or enforced chastity? Not a damn thing! That’s my point. My work around the house is not some mystical byproduct of Mrs. Lion taking charge. As a “surrendered husband” I don’t find myself needing to do housework. Cooking is a lifelong passion and has no relationship with my penis in a cage. My point is that some people like to invent definitions for what we do. Some say that surrendered husbands must wear panties and do all of the housework; essentially become housewives as a condition of the FLR relationship. Some say the same stuff applies to guys in enforced chastity.

Aside from being total bullshit, people who believe this are making a very unflattering statement about women. If women are second class citizens, making a man where her feminine undies is a way to reduce his status. Similarly, if housework is
beneath normal, red-blooded, American men, then forcing a man to do it shows his subservient status. When I wrote that I do the laundry, change the bed, and clean the bathroom, I got responses that congratulated me for being submissive. Well, no, cleaning and laundry do not make me submissive at all.

I’ve been doing that stuff forever. In our house, we have always shared chores. We never had a schedule, not that it isn’t a good idea, we did things as we saw them needing to be done. In some cases I would growl a bit about the state of floors or dust and Mrs. Lion would handle it. This had nothing to do with roles. It has everything to do with my severe allergies. Even now that Mrs. Lion rules the den, she still vacuums and does most of the stuff she did before we got into any of this. When I am working, she generally does the laundry on Sunday. I almost always clean the bathrooms (not very dusty there).

Could Mrs. Lion give me a list of chores to do? Of course! I am her surrendered husband. But she doesn’t have to in order for me to pull my weight around the house. FLR is not about “things”. It’s about power exchange. Each couple has to decide how that manifests. We are just starting to figure that out.  One thing that has definitely changed is that I am held responsible for following all my rules, trivial or not. Last night was punishment night (Mondays and Thursdays) and I had three issues on my list. I was spanked soundly to help me remember to do what I am told.