I read a lot of comments by caged males about how their keyholders don’t meet there expectations of how their chastity should play out. They complain that their partners aren’t paying enough attention to their forced chaste state. They don’t get enough sexual teasing. Then some complain that they are properly submissive, but their partners still don’t play the way they want. There is the strident tone of being violated in these complaints. Some go so far as to say that the instant the cage is locked on, they magically become submissive.  The magic conversion to “submissive” is much more likely something that you do because you believe it is part of the experience. Let’s face it, we volunteer to get our penises locked up. Our partners did not sneak up on us while we slept and put us in cages. We volunteered. In fact, most of us had to convince our partners to do this for us.

If our keyholders get into what we asked them to do and take real control it can be a wish come true, or it could be something else, like being left alone with no acknowledgement or stimulation; just a caged cock. At that point, if the control is not to our liking, we try to negotiate for a chastity experience closer to our fantasies. In short, a bit of topping from the bottom. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. After all, you had something in mind when you suggested it.

The other alternative is where your keyholder locks you up out of love but has not real sexual investment in your chastity. This is my current situation. In that case, my submission is directed by me. Is that a bad thing? Not really. Mrs. Lion is doing her part and I have my weenie in a cage. It may not be my dream femdom fantasy, but it is a realization of my wish and maybe with time, it will become something she internalizes too. I really hope so. In the meantime I will continue to behave as a good boy and remain grateful for her attention and love.

We have to realize that we spent quite a while thinking and reading about forced chastity before we approached our keyholders to do this for us. I know that I remind myself daily that Mrs. Lion is only six weeks into having her husband in a cage. She needs time to process this and integrate it into her life. I am profoundly grateful that she is willing to do this for me. It was my idea. I am very happy we are living this fantasy. She deserves enormous credit for her willingness to do this for me. I have my grumpy moments when I wish she were more active and providing more stimulation. But then I realize that this isn’t my game. She has the key and she got it without any strings attached. It’s up to her to decide what happens to me. I’ll just go into a corner and growl quietly out of frustration. I’ll also think about how wonderful it is that I am in this predicament. Thank you Mrs. Lion!

A lot has been written about male milking. If the term is new to you, it means to get a man to produce semen without sexual orgasm. Erection isn’t even needed. This is accomplished by massaging the prostate. This practice is very useful for long term forced chastity. It permits clearing out old semen without ever removing the cage. Some people believe that regular release of semen is not necessary. In some men that may be true, but others can develop thickening of the residual semen over time that could require medical intervention.

The testicles are not involved in this at all. Sperm, produced in the balls, is reabsorbed by the body if not used. It’s nature’s way to assure a fresh supply of swimmers. Sperm is only a tiny percentage of male ejaculate. The majority of the fluid is produced in the prostate gland. It’s generally believed that regular emptying of the prostate is a good idea. Normally, the prostate is emptied by ejaculation. However, our keyholders may not want us to have that pleasure. That’s where milking comes in.

Male milking is accomplished by massaging the prostate. You do this by inserting a finger or other device into the anus and then press through the wall of the colon to massage the prostate directly. You can’t really do this yourself with a finger; at least I can’t, but your keyholder can. She just puts a finger up your ass and then feels along the way on the wall facing your belly button until she comes across a walnut-sized, fairly hard body. That’s the prostate. Pressing and releasing as well as rubbing it, should eventually get it to release semen which will drip out of the penis. The male will feel like he has to pee. It isn’t urine. He has to relax and let the fluid come out. Some keyholders collect the semen on a plate and serve it to the male as a nice treat.

The best milking position is with the male on his hands and knees, ass in the air. Over the years, Mrs. lion and I tried this several times. On a few occasions I could feel the need to pee, but nothing came out. At that point I wasn’t sure if male milking wasn’t more than a myth. Then I saw some videos that showed male milking is very real. In the videos men milked themselves with various dildos and probes. It can be done! Milking takes practice. It can take up to an hour the first time. A vibrating butt plug is one way to get started. We are all different, so experimentation is needed to find what works for you.

The point of all this is to empty the prostate without sexual satisfaction. Once fully milked, a male will not be able to orgasm even if uncaged and masturbating. He will have to recharge. It’s a very interesting sensation being milked. Even though it didn’t work the last time we tried, I got a very helpless feeling. I knew that I was going to be milked of my semen and all I would get is the uncomfortable feeling of needing to pee; no orgasm, not even an erection. From the perspective of the keyholder, milking is a very dominant activity that demonstrates true sexual ownership of the male.

Please leave comments with your milking experiences. It would be great to get both male and keyholder perspectives.

Last night I got a sweet surprise. Mrs. Lion started a teasing session. She took me out of my cage and played with my penis until I was just ready to come. She stopped and I sighed. She ignored my sound. I was left out of my cage. About a half hour later, she began again. This time, when I was very close, I said, “I’m about to come.” I wanted to help her if her intention was teasing me. She didn’t stop. I had the predictable result, a very nice juice orgasm. After I calmed down, I asked her why she was so kind to me. Her reply, “I know you are starting a new job tomorrow and I don’t want you to be grumpy.”

How thoughtful! Mrs. Lion always has my best interests in mind. I can count on her to keep me safe and happy. Well, not always happy. Last night we went to a concert. Before we left, she offered me a choice: wear my cage or wear a diaper to the concert. She said, “I am pretty sure which you will pick.”

I picked the cage, of course. She knew I would. I spent all night out of a diaper. So nice to use the toilet! Got an email this morning from Mature Metal; my Jail Bird cage was mailed today. In a couple of days I will be able to report on how it feels to wear a custom-fit cage. Hopefully the measurements are right and that will be my permanent home. Feels a bit odd to say “permanent” but I think that is accurate.

Now that I am settled in my Chinese cage, I am barely aware it is there except when I want to reach down and give my penis a quick rub. Nothing orgasmic, just the reassuring feeling of my hard cock in my hand. That’s no longer possible. When out and about, peeing sitting down in public bathrooms is an unwelcome addition to my life. And weekends; three nights and two days of full time diaper wearing; it’s hard to ignore and I think it is impossible to make totally routine.

The simple fact is that these changes are clear signals that I am no longer in charge of my sexuality. Someone else owns my ability to get sexual pleasure. I also can’t forget that she also has the power to take away other things, like using a toilet on weekends. I find myself moving between the excitement of feeling her control and the frustration and weariness of changes in the most basic of my bodily functions. I suspect that one of the big reasons most males who want to play with forced chastity, do it in a very limited context. They get locked up (or lock themselves up) for long enough for them to get desperate for sexual release, then they get unlocked until the urge to be locked up gets strong enough to overcome the remembered frustration.

Couples who attempt forced chastity also drop out rather quickly too. I think the main reason is that the male wants to substitute non-orgasmic sexual activity for the loss of the use of their cocks. This usually takes the form of demands for extensive, frequent teasing and endless, tedious chastity “chats” with their mates. Sooner or later their keyholders will grow tired of this incessant chatter and demands for attention and the play will end.

Those of us who want to integrate forced chastity into our lives long term have to understand that our keyholders don’t necessarily share the need to lock us up that we wish they would feel. Mrs. Lion doesn’t see any benefits for her beyond making me happy. Though “happy” doesn’t really fit. I am unsure how to describe how I feel. Some of the time I feel frustrated because I want to get off. In fact, that isn’t constant or terribly hard to take. Other times I resent the inconvenience of sitting to pee and wearing my weekend diapers. However, I make it a point to not discuss this, my fantasies of what will happen while locked up, or my interest in forced chastity with her. She knows how I feel and is quickly learning what I need. The harder lesson for her is to do what I need even if I don’t like it. The old, “This will hurt me more than it will hurt you” really applies here.

So, now that I am back in my weekend diaper, I am sexually frustrated, too warm between my legs (the diaper makes me hot down there — not sexually, thermally) and smelling less than daisy fresh down there. I have to stop myself from saying something about how I am feeling. I know from my past as a top that domination is not always fun for the bottom. In fact, it is rarely fun. But, the power exchange between Mrs. Lion and I is unmistakable. That’s what I wanted. I wanted to feel her control. Well, I feel it. I don’t like it right now, but I feel it. This isn’t Mary Poppins. There isn’t always a spoonful of sugar to make this medicine go down. While I wish I had some of that sugar right now, I am also happy in a perverse way that I feel the way I do. It means that I got my wish; Mrs. Lion is firmly in control. It’s starting to itch again down there from the sweating inside my diaper. Damn!