Lion actually told me I was hitting him too hard during his maintenance spanking. I was using the bloodwood paddle with the stair tread traction tape on one side, although I wasn’t using the gripper tape side. Afterward, Lion told me this is a light paddle. Then how could I have been hitting too hard?

He was surprised when I backed off after he said it was too hard. What else was I supposed to do? He said I normally back off a bit and then ramp up again. Apparently I didn’t do that. What I did do was swat him harder when I went slower. He still got 300 swats but some of them had a few beats between them.

He was fairly deep red with a few drops of blood on his right cheek, but it didn’t surprise me when he reported no lasting effect this morning. It wasn’t the right paddle for that. The surface area has to be smaller to concentrate the force. Plus, I wasn’t hitting that hard. It was, after all, a maintenance spanking and not real punishment. If I had hit as hard as a punishment spanking, I don’t think he would have been able to take 300 swats.

When I was all done with the spanking, Lion asked if we were doing the Box O’Fun. I didn’t think we would. Then he wondered if that meant he couldn’t have sex. He wanted sex. I’ve been thinking that forgoing the Box O’Fun shouldn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t get sex. Suppose he’s just not in the mood to be poked, prodded or pinched. Or suppose he’s just had a maintenance spanking. I say he can still opt for snuggling or sex. And what I say goes, so I gave him the better part of a blow job. Okay, maybe not the better part. I got him oh-so-close a few times and then he was done. Maybe he needed to be poked, prodded or pinched after all. I don’t think so. Maybe he just needs to be more frustrated.

I can do that.

We were supposed to be leaving tomorrow for a camping trip. I have to admit, I was not looking forward to driving seven hours, setting up the camper, driving around sightseeing, taking down the camper five days later, and driving seven hours home; plus, worrying about the virus. The camper seemed to be on my side this time. The satellite dish decided to act stupid. Our tire pressure monitor died. And Lion thought we were leaving Thursday rather than Wednesday. It was a comedy of errors. We’ve pushed the trip off for a month. By then, hopefully, the virus will have calmed down and we’ll be better prepared.

hard rubber spanking paddle
My rubber spanking paddle. This is a nice wide-faced paddle that Lion hates. 🙂

Lion wanted a maintenance spanking last night. My test of the husband beater the other night didn’t count. He wanted a “real” spanking. His theory is that neither of us will get out of practice if we do maintenance spankings. Ordinarily, Lion isn’t so well-behaved. He earns spankings frequently enough that we don’t forget the feeling. Sometimes, he’s on his best behavior and we need a reminder.

After I finished the dinner dishes, he was snoozing away. I sat down to wait for him to wake up. He’d stir and make a comment about the TV and then snooze again. By the time he woke up for good, it was around nine o’clock. I thought that was a little too late to start any type of festivity. It’s not a problem at all. I’d rather have him get the sleep he needs than force him to play. The maintenance spanking will happen tonight.

I’m not sure if I’ll do a normal spanking or if I’ll go for 300 swats. Lion remembered those 300 swats as being some of the only times I’ve left a lasting mark on him. I should hope so! Three hundred swats is a lot. I’d think there’d be some bruising even if I wasn’t trying to do it. I’d have to hit the same spots over and over. His butt isn’t big enough to spread out too much. And I’d be focusing the swats on the sit spot for maximum effect anyway.

I found quite a few members of my spanking arsenal recently, but I’m not sure if I want to use them or the same old, same old paddles. I’m not necessarily going for bruising. I think I just want a nice, wide-headed paddle to distribute the love over a greater area. Normally, that won’t bring a bruise but, as I said, it’s probably inevitable if I hit the same spots repeatedly during 300 swats. And that’s assuming I do the 300 swats. I guess I’ll have to see how it goes. If I start counting, I can always revert back to a normal spanking if he seems too bloody too early. It really does depend on his response to the whole thing. His butt may be hard to mark but it’s easy to make bleed.

[Lion — I’ll put skin lotion on my butt after my shower.]

Yesterday in my post “Great Sex As We Age: Four-Step Foreplay” I talked about modifying both male and female foreplay to account for changes as we age. Even though I understand what’s happening, it still bothers me. I really can’t wrap my head around the fact that I need substantial warm up to be ready for sex. It just doesn’t feel fair.

Meanwhile, we continue to enjoy our adventurous sex life. I should really say my adventurous sex life. Mrs. Lion isn’t interested right now. I keep hoping I can find a way to get her back into the game. In the meantime, she has to work a lot harder to arouse me. I’m very grateful that she’s willing to put in the effort. It’s a truly altruistic act.

Even though it’s not directly sexual, our female led relationship is exciting to me. There are very real, painful penalties for failing to please my lioness. The penalties are meted out with Mrs. Lion’s paddles. It’s exciting to think about being spanked.

This is one of the more confusing aspects of a disciplinary relationship. Even though the rules and punishments are real, there is a sexual undercurrent. What we do isn’t power-play. It’s real punishment for real offenses. Nevertheless, it apparently provides sexual stimulation for me.

I’m carefully avoiding the labels, “dominant” and “submissive”. These suggest an oversimplification of a fairly complex process. I like to feel Mrs. Lion’s authority. It is deeply exciting to me. I’m not sure it’s an emotional necessity as much as a sexual one.

I don’t want to have sex after being punished. The spanking hurts a lot and I just want to go off and lick my wounds. Yet, the next time Mrs. Lion tries to arouse me it’s easier. Go figure!

maintenance spankings keep the sexual furnace burning

split rubber spanking paddle
I have no idea why I have a sexual connection to this. It hurts like hell and I try to avoid meeting it again, but if I don’t, my sex drive slows down.

We’ve come up with all sorts of rationalizations about why maintenance spanking is important. Other people have too. I think the actual bottom-line truth is that receiving punishment-level spanking flips some deep-seated sexual switches. I also think that for me the more severe the spanking the more satisfying it is on this deep level.

If my spanking makes my butt sore for days, the memory of each twinge is both sexual and instructive. This is complicated for me. I definitely work hard to avoid earning a spanking. The memory of how much it hurts is in my mind when I remember to set up the coffeepot or do other things Mrs. Lion has told me to do. I am actively working to avoid another spanking.

Yet if I don’t get what I’m avoiding on a regular basis, my sexual interest seems to drop off. Spanking me charges my sexual battery. Experience has taught me that a lighter, play spanking isn’t that effective. That deep, dark part of me wants it to hurt and hurt a lot. I want a maintenance spanking to hurt as much as one delivered to punish me.

That’s hard for me to admit. If in some way spanking provides me with sexual fuel, is it really a punishment?

I think it is.

Punishment hurts and it also turns me on

Just because I have a sexual connection to spanking, it doesn’t mean that it isn’t an effective punishment. My underlying attraction to it may be why I willingly get myself into position for a beating I will hate. It also may be why I accept it. Experience has shown us that punishing me does change my behavior. The change isn’t permanent. Eventually, I will slip and need a painful reminder.

I guess we both have to accept that our disciplinary activities operate on more than one level. P promptly spanking me for breaking a rule or annoying Mrs. Lion, makes me change. I also get much more interested in sex.

Mrs. Lion has always treated sex as completely separate from punishment. It doesn’t matter to her if I am turned on by my punishments. It’s just helpful to her when she wants to arouse me later. It would be a problem if the spanking didn’t correct the offense.

It’s a little hard for me to understand how something so unpleasant ultimately turns me on. I think Mrs. Lion has known about this for a long time. If I’ve been a good boy for too long, a maintenance spanking will recharge my sexual battery without affecting our disciplinary relationship.

We’ve agreed that if I break a rule soon after the maintenance spanking, I get a punishment spanking as severe as usual. Just because my butt may be marked by a spanking, it doesn’t stop Mrs. Lion from punishing me again even if it’s only an hour after my last spanking. She sees it as my problem for not being more careful. I agree.