By:
In: Living with Lion

If Lion does his surgery, (he’s still trying to decide and probably will be until the day before) he will be out of commission for a while. I’ll be doing all of the heavy lifting around here. Chores that I don’t normally do will fall to me. All of the cooking, except for easy stick-it-in-the-microwave-and-push-the-button meals, will be done by me. I’m betting a lot of the meals I “cook” will be the easy microwave ones too.

Yesterday, Lion took a shower before dinner. For some reason, I was tired and I just planned to snooze until Lion was out of the shower and we’d both get dinner ready. Surprise! Next thing I knew, he was walking in the door with dinner. Oops. He said I looked so peaceful and he knows he won’t be able to do much after the surgery so he got dinner ready by himself and let me sleep. After dinner, he asked if I could take the garbage out since the remnants of the chicken we had would likely stink up the kitchen. As I was cleaning up the dishes, Lion took the garbage out. When I asked him why he said he was getting a head start on good deeds for when he can’t do them. Banking a little good will toward the time he assumes he’ll be a whining, in-pain Lion.

I told him that’s not how it works. Besides, he takes care of me when I’m sick. We take care of each other. He doesn’t have to build up any bonus points. If I ever need surgery that has a long rehab period, he’ll do the same for me. We are trying to think ahead to have things ready that can be done before the surgery, but not all things have that ability. We can’t for example, take the garbage out ahead of time. The can is empty until we create the garbage. We can’t buy all the food we’ll need for the next six months. We don’t have the storage and some of it needs to be fresh.

I appreciate everything Lion does around here. I’m sure I’ll appreciate it more when he can’t do it. But he doesn’t have to get on my good side by doing more things. He’s already on my good side. Right beside me.

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Living with Lion

Our male chastity practice is being challenged. The carefully built routine is disrupted in a very unexpected way: My shoulder injury is serious and will require surgery and a long period of recuperation. Before surgery I am suffering considerable shoulder pain, particularly at night.

This pain has made Mrs. Lion much more tentative about physically approaching me. I am also not wearing my cage because when I am wild, I can pee standing up. This is easier than sitting and having to use my shoulder to help stand and sit. It may be that I can wear the cage until surgery, but after it, I can’t for quite a long time.

Two things are new: First, I am wild (cage free). Second, I am in pain much of the time. Mrs. Lion suggested that because of the pain, I should let her know when I want an orgasm or play. I didn’t want this. I believe that our established power structure shouldn’t change because of this medical condition. Mrs. Lion agreed to remain in charge and decide when I would be edged and when I would be allowed to come.

Mrs. Lion decided to look to me for “cues” that I am available for fun. So, if she saw me reading my iPad, she interpreted that as meaning I didn’t want attention. She looked for other cues as well. The net result has been that we have had almost no physical/sexual contact.

It feels to me that we have returned to the “bad old days” before male chastity. There is a big difference, however. We now communicate. So, yesterday I brought this up. I asked if Mrs. Lion thinks that this change is at least partly due to me being wild for so long. She doesn’t think so.

She said that the issue was her concern about my discomfort. I suggested that she proceed exactly the way she has for the last three years: just go ahead and approach me. When I wear the cage, she comes over to my side of the bed and removes the cage. Then, in a while she will move over and snuggle. The generally moves to teasing and edging followed occasionally with an orgasm. She will also bring her “bag of tricks” on occasion and do some CBT before moving on to edging and orgasm. Sometimes she brings other toys as well.

Things aren’t exactly broken. Neither of us wants to change the hard-won sexual success. We just have to learn how to integrate my injury and recovery into our great pattern. We’re not ready to let injury and disability interfere with us. We need to have our own disability accommodation plan. Things won’t be the same. That’s ok as long as we maintain the most physical intimacy we can.

By:
In: Living with Lion, Mrs Lion Comments

Once again, I thought I was being nice to Lion. I offered to let him decide when we play and when he gets an orgasm. I know he’s in pain now and will be if he has the surgery. I thought it would be better if I don’t bother him when he’s in the most pain. He doesn’t like the idea. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. He hasn’t liked it any other time when I’ve suggested he make decisions about play or sex. But it does surprise me. This is a completely different situation and I thought if he can’t control the pain, maybe he’d like to have other control. Nope. No thank you. Not necessary. Not wanted.

Okay. So I guess it’s up to me to decipher the signals. Fun! Lion doesn’t always say when he’s in pain. I don’t know if he thinks it’s a sign of weakness. He made a comment the other day about a new lion coming into the pride, there’s a battle, and the lionesses are now the property of the winner. I guess that makes them fickle. I told Lion that if anyone came into our little pride and tried to fight him, they’d have to get through me first. I’m pretty sure if the lionesses banded together, they could kill or chase off the newcomer. But I’m equally sure they don’t because the winner would be seen as the stronger one and, therefore, more worthy of having a pride. I’m glad human Lions are smarter than that. I don’t want a newcomer. Stronger or not.

Lion is still waffling about the surgery. He’s in a lot of pain now. He’ll be in a lot of pain after. He’s worried about things he can’t do right after the surgery. I’m worried about things he can’t do now. He’s worried about the length of time off of work and the long recovery period. I’m worried he’s in more pain than he’s letting on and it could get worse suddenly if the tendon tears more. He’s worried he’ll never regain full use of his arm. I know he doesn’t have full use now. And around and around we go. Only he knows how much pain he’s in at any given time. That’s why I wanted him to have the option of deciding when/if we play. He’s a stubborn man.