“A man will listen to anything if he thinks it’s foreplay.” (Susan Surandon, Bull Durham, 1988) This very-true-if-cynical line is one of the most fundamental truths about male sexuality. In some respects we are uncomplicated creatures when it comes to sex. Nature wired us have a high tolerance for anything if the end result is an orgasm. In fact, many of us love all that stuff we go through for that three-second glorious goal. There is a common misconception that all men want to get to that orgasm as quickly as possible. That was once true of me when I was younger. It seems to me that the more orgasms we can have in a day, the less we value the steps leading to it.

This could have something to do with the fact that people who pursue enforced chastity tend to be older. Over time. some of us learn that the chase is as much fun as the goal. There are lots of denigrating expressions like, leading him around by his cock that allude to the same concept Susan Surandon expressed so concisely.  This isn’t accidental. Almost all mammals only have sex when the female is in estrus, capable of being fertilized. Only a few species engage in sex regardless of the female’s ability to conceive. Some evolutionary scientists believe that our recreational sex is a survival strategy. If women were only available for sex during their fertile days, there would be no incentive for the males to hang around the rest of the time.

That may sound demeaning, but it makes sense. So, the desire to get off is a social tool to keep males home instead of going out with the guys. At a very basic level, males of most species, including us, are motivated by the desire for an orgasm. Women are more complex sexual creatures. While many women have very strong libidos, it is rarely at the top of their priorities. I suspect that one of the reasons we males puzzle them is that they just can’t understand why we would put getting off above so many more important things.

Kink, I think, is just increasing the emphasis on something that is common to all of us. In the case of enforced chastity, it’s the exciting feeling of being led around by the cock; waiting for the big finish. We males are conditioned from birth to yield to females. We are taught that we will get a nice treat if we are good. You can see why we might want to surrender sexual control, right? Obviously, my desire to consciously give up control and be locked up is a magnification of the normal male reaction to females, but it is, at the bottom, normal.

This tidbit is a key piece of information for key holders. It is the basic truth behind all those weird fantasies we males have. Enforced chastity is the ultimate way to be led around by our cocks. It converts a somewhat subtle process into an overt expression of dominance and submission. That’s it. There may be elaborate fantasies and requests for activities like spanking or bondage, but the bottom line is that we want to be led around by our cocks.

Once a keyholder understands this, it’s easy to keep us happy. Just figuratively lead us around by our penises. Make us earn our infrequent orgasms. Punish us as necessary. Let us know that we won’t even get hard unless you decide we deserve it. Any sexual pleasure we get will be a treat you decide to give us. That’s the key. The rest that can turn a game into a lifestyle will follow.

As directed, Lion was wearing his pink frilly panties when I got home last night. He was clearly uncomfortable so when he asked to take them off I let him. I had no illusions that they would turn me on and they didn’t. The only thing it accomplished was to let him know that I am in charge. Not that it isn’t important, but I’d consider the panties a bust. The nail polish is effective because he can see it but not feel it. He can forget it’s there until he looks at his toes. The panties are just physically uncomfortable. I don’t see an up side to his wearing them.

If I had to rate the last three attempts to show control, I’d say the nail polish is at the top of the list followed by diapers and then the panties. The diapers are at least comfortable until they get wet. If I allow him to change once he’s wet then the diapers will work. He’ll still hate them but they will be tolerable. He definitely has nail polish in his future. I even threatened to buy the colors of the football team we are rooting for in the playoffs. If they make it to the Super Bowl I may paint his toes in alternating team colors. I just know he’s looking forward to that.

I have designated tonight as my orgasm night. I’m still hoping to jump start things. So far I’m not any hornier than I was before I started scheduling orgasms. I didn’t think it would happen overnight so we will continue on with the experiment. Besides, it’s nice to have Lion’s attention. Tonight is also a Lion play night. I was thinking of unlocking him before he gave me my orgasm but I know he thinks I will want to play with him while he plays with me. Actually my thought was that after he gives me my orgasm, assuming I still have any energy left, I could ride him and maybe have another orgasm with him inside me. That way Lion would have some fun and I may have some more fun. I don’t think he’ll disagree with that idea. We’ll have to see how it goes.

Today Lion’s frilly panties arrived. He called them his mistake. It’s partly true. He got one pink pair and one green pair. If I had bought them they would have both been feminine colors. Maybe pink and hot pink. Or purple. Or a lovely shade of yellow. They do, however, have a red rose on them which I think is a very nice touch.

When will Lion be wearing them? He wonders that too. I don’t think I will make him wear them to work. He already has to deal with not peeing on himself with the cage. And someone might see the cage although I’m not sure how often guy’s look at each other while they’re peeing. Having someone see the panties would be too much. Besides, I think it’s much more of a statement when he’s walking around the house undressed and can see the panties. Like his painted toe nails, it’s a visual thing. Knowing I made him prance around with girly toes and a girly butt is where the power comes into play.

I have to wonder why he’s always so gung-ho about these things. He swears he hates diapers, but if you could see how many diapers we have in the house right now you’d think he was lying. He doesn’t really want to wear panties, but he’s the one who bought them. Right. Sure, Lion. You don’t want to wear them. Wink, wink.

I may let him stew for a few days before I make him put them on. Then again, he might be wearing them by tonight. I also have to decide when he gets his sparkly purple toe nails. Lots of fun ahead for poor Lion.

My new panties
In a very weak moment, after the fumes from Mrs. Lion’s nail painting made me giddy, I ordered these online. (Left) front view of pink panties, (Right) back view of green pair. What was I thinking!

Our year is ending with a bang. My sexual activity has gone up amazingly. I think I will have had four or five orgasms (at least) in December alone. See the liontracker for details. I get a couple of days off before my New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day orgasms. Mrs. Lion had a post-Christmas orgasm and has another one scheduled for January 2. The lion den is just sex, sex, sex this holiday season. I’m not complaining at all. It’s been great fun.

Even more interesting is Mrs. Lion’s change in attitude. She has become more of a femdom keyholder. I don’t want to ascribe any motives, but she is far less interested in how I like her decisions. Most notably her decision to paint my toenails. I’m not fond of women with painted toenails and I can say without hesitation that I truly dislike seeing my size twelve, bright, pink big toes when my feet loom into view. I have made some humiliation suggestions from time to time, but never, ever suggested nail polish. Yuck! I’m not going to whine about this further. I do see this new blow to my male ego as a serious step forward for Mrs. Lion, if a mincing one back for me.

She not only came up with this odious idea on her own, but has turned a deaf ear to my  objections. I can’t really growl about this. After all, it’s what I wanted all along. Didn’t I? Didn’t I?  Because I am basically stupid, I ordered two absolutely horrid pairs of Manties male panties. If I end up wearing these (and others?), this time it’s my own fault. I got that little humiliating “thrill” and acted on it. It could be a tossup between these and my painted nails for most-hated change in my life. I’m pretty sure they will make Mrs. Lion laugh. That’s their one redeeming quality.

What have we learned? One: I have some interest in private humiliation. Two: I have no interest in being feminized. That’s why item “one” works. Three: I have to learn to keep my big ideas to myself, and Four: I should be very careful what I order online. And five: I’m not a very bright lion.