Tired
Mrs. Lion and I don’t make much fuss for the holidays. I suspect she would like to do more than we do. I’m all in favor of accommodating her desire. A change would be nice.
Speaking of change, I’m starting to question what I am doing here. Every day for four years (give or take), Mrs. Lion and I have faithfully shared our thoughts and experiences. In over 2,600 posts our readers have shared each and every sexual moments of our marriage. I’ve spent substantial amounts of money keeping this blog available. Why would we do it? More specifically, why would I use valuable time and money for this pursuit?
I know we have a lot of readers. I use tools to let me know how many people read and what they look at. It’s good that we are one of the most popular sexually-oriented blogs in the world. But it’s not that good a feeling; at least for me. Lots of anonymous people find us every day. They read our words and then fade back into the mist. A tiny percentage of our readers let us know they like what they read (they click the “like” button). Another minute fraction leave comments.
Of course, we aren’t alone in this. The vast majority of people consider the Web the same way they think of TV: they read some and then change the channel. I’m not ungrateful for your attention. I like it. But do I like it enough to work as hard as I do to put something new in front of you every day?
I suppose every writer gets to this point. I own my own printing press (this blog), so anything I want to say is immediately published. That’s cool. Based on blog popularity polls (not readership), we don’t even make the list most of the time. Of course, like blogs, the polls are the product of a single mind. So it doesn’t represent a real measure of the writers who are rated.
I have my own favorites. On top of my list (not surprisingly) is “Strict Julie Spanks“. It’s well written, sexy, and has given real help to us. I’ve grown to love it’s writer. She leaves regular comments here that provide insight we can use to enrich our activities. I like others as well. Some stand out because the writing is verbal fireworks that provide fleeting-but-beautiful images in my mind. Others are gritty and poorly written, but spark me at some level. A few sadden me. I read them because I hope that their writers will wake up and realize the futility of their searches.
The glorious anonymity of blogging allows some people to expose realities they would never share if they had to sign their names. They get a chance to expose hidden places with no real risk.
All of us have some expectations that drive our hours spent writing. Some are using their blogs as a giant personal ad. They seek the ideal “sub”. Sadly, their search is confined to guys who are younger, fit, and instantly submissive. From what I’ve read, these bloggers rarely find what they seek. Some read blogs and decide that they want to share too. These blogs rarely have a point of view. They are descriptions of sexual events in their lives or imaginations. These can be great reads.
Ours started because I thought it would be cool to journal my entry into enforced chastity. My inspiration was the movie “Julie and Julia”. It was about a woman who decided to cook every recipe in a Julia Childs cookbook and write a post every day about her adventures in cooking. I figured it would be fun to do the same thing with our try at enforced chastity.
After a while, the blog became a daily part of our lives. I don’t think either of us gave much though to why we were putting in the work to write a post every day. We used each other’s posts as a form of long form email. Our posts became a thoughtful conversation we share with you. We could just as easily do this as email or a private blog.
The lack of feedback (comments) kept our conversation feeling almost as private as email. The knowledge that we have thousands of silent readers who we would never meet didn’t detract from the sense of privacy. The only comments I ever get about missing a post come from Mrs. Lion. A few times a week we get email (private feedback) from people who generally want chastity device fitting advice. Based on their writing, they never read a word we wrote. They just googled “male chastity” and then clicked “Contact Us”. I don’t answer them.
From the perspective of a web site professional, we are successful. We rank very high on the search engines. Lots of people visit and click on a variety of pages. From my personal perspective I don’t feel that positive. I was hoping that the blog would be more interactive. I wanted to feel a sense of community with other writers. That community doesn’t exist. I suppose I wanted praise too. I know that I am a good writer. I’m not so sure that I have all that much to say.
I can fade into the sunset. If I leave the blog accessible, I doubt our reader count will go down much if I never write another word. Sure, some people will lose a daily read. But if they go back to 2014 and start over, it will be a long time before they’ll notice I’m gone. I have no illusions about this. Yesterday’s post ends up lining the bottom of the figurative bird cage. The static pages on enforced chastity and discipline remain popular.
In the Facebook, Instagram, Twitter world the blog is a dusty relic. Maybe the weight of all that dust is going to sink me. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. But it’s possible you won’t find out from me.