It’s nice that the weekend is here again. Mrs. Lion and I can be together all the time.  I’ve been wild all week so there is no device to take off for the weekend. I wonder if the Jail Bird will be going back on Sunday night. There’s no physical reason it can’t. Of course, when I wear it it’s extra work for Mrs. Lion to remove when she wants to snuggle and play.

I’ve written a lot about the declining usefulness of my chastity device. At this point, its only sexual value is that it prevents any spontaneous erections. The very short 1-inch-long cage suppresses even the smallest expression of arousal. I like that. Well, I like it in the same sense that I like spanking. It’s exciting to think about that level of control but it isn’t so much fun when I really, truly want to get hard.

Julie, of strictjuliespanks has been collaborating with one of her readers to write a book-length story featuring a wide range of kinks. (Click here to begin reading.) A new chapter comes out every month or so. She’s just published chapter 5. It’s the story of a college-age boy, his sister, and two of her friends. I find it very hot. I don’t normally like Internet sexual fiction, but this story, while uneven in spots, is generally a very hot read. Check it out. I find myself eagerly awaiting each new chapter.

We’re still not entirely back on track. With all the extra things she has to do, Mrs. Lion has a lower-than-usual energy level. Also, it’s always been a challenge to get started. Maybe the Box O’Fun needs to come out again. This is one of those good-news-bad-news activities for me. A majority of the activities I can draw from the box are painful. They are supposed to be.

Mrs. Lion wrote in her post yesterday, that some of the things she does for me can be chores. One activity that we’ve just started: bathing me, seems to be something she likes almost as much as I do. After dinner tonight I get the first of my weekend showers where she spends extra time making sure her weenie is nice and clean.

She isn’t as fond of waxing me. I’ve offered to go to a professional and save her the trouble. She said that even though it’s a chore removing my hair, she still wants to do it. In fairness to her, she’s neutral about whether or not I have body hair. From the day she met me, I had no pubic hair. Even if I wanted to grow it back, only a little patch here and there would show up. Almost all of it is permanently gone.

I’ve enjoyed losing my chest, shoulder, back and leg hair. I think they look better that way. For one thing, my hairless pubes don’t look so starkly different from the rest of me. In any case, I like being hairless. It’s neater and cleaner. If it becomes too much trouble for Mrs. Lion to continue, I think I can find a commercial studio that can get rid of the hair for me. Since I only need waxing every four or five weeks it’s not too bad.

What time we do things seems to impact my enjoyment of the activities. The later it gets, the less likely I am to get aroused and get to the edge. I think I’m getting tired earlier because a lot of things are still more difficult for me to do. I would like to try afternoon play during the weekend. We used to do that. Mrs. Lion would tell me to go down to our dungeon and she would strap me into the sling. She would then do anal play some CBT, followed by lots of teasing and a possible orgasm. I really loved that.

During the week, it’s difficult for her to do anything sexual before dinner. She comes home from work tired and wound up from the frustrations of the day. She needs time to decompress and relax. I wonder if starting our activity before 9 PM is possible. I guess the early bird gets my worm.

We have a long history of successfully adapting to changes and new situations. We talk and write about how we feel and through trial and error find solutions that work for both of us. I have no doubt that we will adapt now.

A couple of nights ago Mrs. Lion had an upset stomach. We didn’t get in our usual snuggles. On Wednesday night, she did come over and we snuggled. It was great. But I noticed she stayed far away from her weenie. I didn’t want to say anything because I know she had been having stomach problems. Finally, when she was about to move away, I asked her why she do anything sexual. She told me that I wrote that I wasn’t that interested in sex in my post for yesterday. I went back and reread my post. I didn’t actually say that I wasn’t interested in sex. I did mention that the medications I’m taking may have a negative effect on my interest.

It’s not important that we had that little misunderstanding. It is significant that even a slight mention of lack of interest would generate such a strong reaction. If you’ve been reading our blog for a while, you know that we learn about each other both through conversation and via what we write every day. We also have an email conversation that goes on throughout the day while she’s at work. Prior to all this surgical stuff, Mrs. Lion would either ask me about the “lion weather” or I would let her know my sexual temperature.

Between our email exchanges and the blog, we would clearly communicate our sexual interests for the day. I’m not sure why we started doing this . I know that it seems sort of mechanical to spell out in advance our sexual expectations. Optimally, this should be a spontaneous activity. The fact is that we were never very good at that. Our personalities just don’t lend themselves to romantic outbursts.

Since our sexual activities tend to be kinky and one-sided, spontaneous expressions become even more difficult. I don’t particularly like having a conversation about what are going to do immediately before we do it. That just doesn’t feel awfully sexy to me. So, over time we’ve developed our signaling system.

This isn’t just compensation for things we should do that we don’t. It’s also an opportunity for Mrs. Lion to build anticipation. If she starts writing me about things she’s thinking of doing to me, my mind starts chewing that over and my penis reacts accordingly. She pulled back on doing this because sometimes she doesn’t feel able to follow through and then knows I’ll probably be disappointed. If she under promises she’s covered and if she does end up doing something more, I’m delighted.

This worked very well for us. It worked even better when I was given more to think about. I think it was better to risk a little disappointment then not to promise anything. I really like anticipating. I’m a big boy and if some activity needs to be postponed I have no trouble handling it. Mrs. Lion, on the other hand, really hates to disappoint me in any way. She puts a lot of pressure on herself to come through for me.

I appreciate this effort, but I think it’s not good for either of us. I don’t think she can help it. All I can do is remind her that good intentions are better than no intentions. Delaying some fun activity can increase my anticipation even if it provides a momentary disappointment that I can’t have whatever it is when I thought I would get it. After all, the key precept of our FLRD and enforced male chastity is that I don’t control sexual things. Making me wait is certainly part of the game.

In one important sense, Mrs. Lion is right about my sexual interest. All these medications and medical procedures have blunted the sharp edge of my horniness. All of these necessary-but-distracting activities affect her almost as much as they affect me. It seems to me that now is a very good time to go back to our old pattern of announcing plans in advance to provide lots of anticipation. The risk of disappointing me is much smaller than the benefit of refocusing both of us on things we like.

A week or so ago Mrs. Lion covered my balls with clothespins. I didn’t enjoy it. That seems very odd to me. CBT is something I generally find very exciting. Thinking back, I realize that she silently did this. She didn’t say anything she just got me hard, pulled out her bag of clothespins, and went to work. I had no idea that any BDSM play would take place and I was focused on trying to get past being stuck. I was unprepared to enjoy being covered with clothespins.

It’s taken me until now to realize that I was so focused on dealing with being sexually stuck, that I had no room to consider any activity that didn’t include trying to get me past that brick wall. Had we discussed the clothespins as part of the planned activities for the evening, I think my focus would have been on that kind of fun and not on being unable to reach the edge of orgasm.

I don’t think either of us thought much about the way we use our daily conversations as a form of foreplay. It was a style of communication that evolved over time. We never discussed the trade-off between risking not following through after all the buildup. We never considered that postponing activities is a reasonable part of the anticipation process.

Over time, Mrs. Lion has learned to enjoy frustrating me sexually. She knows that on some level I like it when she brings me to the edge over and over and then locks me up panting for an orgasm. It took her a long time to feel good about that. It’s obvious how badly I want to ejaculate. She can see that sometimes I get frustrated and a little angry that I can’t get to the promised land. She’s learned that this is part of the game. I think she even enjoys seeing my frustration. Maybe building anticipation for activities and then postponing them is just another form of the teasing she can learn to enjoy.

I’m not suggesting she should build up my hopes for a fun spanking or CBT session and then intentionally disappointment me. On the other hand, it’s really not that different from getting me within one stroke of ejaculation and then locking me back up in my cage. It’s all part of sexual control.

The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that building my anticipation is one of the most fun parts of what we’ve done. I think Mrs. Lion may miss my weather reports. I also wonder if I give a neutral or negative report, she shouldn’t use her considerable writing skills to change the lion weather. I think we’ve inadvertently taken a lot of the fun out of what we do. What do you say Mrs. Lion? Can we fix this?

 

A long time ago, when I was still vanilla but Harbored dark, BDSM fantasies, I met and eventually lived with a woman who found these ideas interesting. We both did a lot of reading. At that time, the World Wide Web wasn’t around and the only way to get information was through books or life connections.

She found the reading as interesting as I did. It didn’t take long before we went to a sex shop in New York City and purchased a set of leather restraints, leather paddle, and the long riding crop. Once home, we ehxperimented. First, I tied her to the bed and spanked her. The next morning, she was in a foul mood. It was clear to both of us that she didn’t like to bottom.

The second night was a bit different she secured me with the restraints face-down on the bed. She began spanking me with the paddle. I started out with a raging erection. It didn’t take long to go away. Surprising, to me, after a while the paddling felt good; not Christmas-morning good, but nice. She then began hitting me with the crop. She used the shaft as well as the tip. I squirmed with each blow.

After a short time, she stopped and removed the restraints. She told me it was time to be an “attack lion” and mount her. She came almost as soon as I entered her. She kept the crop in her hand and used it to encourage me to move faster as I fucked her. It was as though she was riding like a horse, even though I was on top.

Over time, her use of the crop during intercourse came to be known as “lion cruise control”. It was obvious we found our roles. It turned out that a couple of things really turned her on. One, which was a surprise to me, was that she liked it when I was inescapably restrained. We bought heavy-duty Master Locks to secure the leather restraints on my wrists and ankles. There was no chance I can get out of them.

When she wanted to flip me over, she unlocked my left or right side, ankle and wrist, have me roll halfway over and secure that side before releasing the other side to allow me to finish my move. Since the restraints were locked on, this maneuver guaranteed I couldn’t get loose even if I wanted to.

The other thing that turned her on was seeing me “suffer”. For example, when I squirmed as she beat me with the crop, it turned her on to see I couldn’t stop the punishment. That particular activity never ceased to drive her crazy. She couldn’t do it for more than a minute or two before she had to be mounted.

Of course she found other things as well. One was a particularly dirty trick. I was lying face down tightly secured to the bed and I felt her hands massaging my balls. It felt so good. She stopped, and a minute or two later my ball started feeling very warm. They got hotter and hotter. When they were really burning, she told me she had massaged BenGay into them. I couldn’t believe that something that felt so good could make me so miserable. To this day it is exciting to have hot stuff applied to my balls even though it invariably makes me miserable.

Now, many years later, I realize how rare this mutual arousal is. Mrs. Lion, for example, has never gotten sexually aroused when beating me or otherwise making me suffer. That’s not intended to be critical. In all fairness, in the many years I was top, I was never particularly turned on torturing my bottoms. I was doing it because they wanted it and because it was fun.

I suppose that in an ideal world, it would be great for both partners to be sexually satisfied in their BDSM roles. In my experience, bottoms are most likely to be sexually aroused. Let’s face it, topping is a service. A lot of men pay professional dominatrixes to top them. topping is a service, right?

I’m very lucky that Mrs. Lion loves me enough to scratch my kinky itches. She brings me a lot of peace and pleasure through her ministrations.

I’m pretty sure that there aren’t many keyholders who get pleasure out of locking their partners in chastity devices. I’m also pretty sure that most of the guys wearing those devices, imagine that their partners get a great deal of pleasure out of locking them up. They believe that doing some extra housework and giving some extra oral attention makes the process worthwhile for their partners.

I believe that’s just not true. Think about it. Wouldn’t you give your partner oral sex as often as she wants with or without chastity device on your penis? Wouldn’t you help her manage your home even if she doesn’t withhold sex to encourage you? The answer better be yes.

Mrs. Lion waxed both legs, my pubes, chest, butt, back and pits.
( Click image to view larger)

Do you think that being naked all the time causes me to think about sex more than I would if dressed? After all, my cock and balls are treated to a wide variety of sensations and temperatures as I go through my day. Sometimes, I have to move my balls out from under me when I sit down. Other times, my hand drops to my lap, and bumps into my cock.

Direct physical contact with my genitals requires no effort at all. Despite that, I don’t find myself getting erections during the day. Sure, when I write about sex, something tends to pop up between my legs. Otherwise, I stay calm the same way I would if fully clothed. Still, I feel a heightened sense of vulnerability because I am naked.

Over the years, I’ve noticed that Mrs. Lion spends more and more of her time naked as well. Is nudity contagious? Have we become a nudist couple? After all, Mrs. Lion has no requirement to remain unclothed. She does it because she wants to.

I’m not sure that she even notices my nudity any more. It never comes up in conversation. She very rarely makes a remark about my exposed cock and balls. Of course, I don’t expect her to offer a running commentary on something I’ve been doing for over 15 years. I guess it’s just part of me now. Clothing is for going out and for when company comes. My natural state is bare and nearly completely hairless.

The most I have actually have on is my chastity device. When wearing that, ironically the only part of my body shielded from view is my penis. Well, you can see some of it between the bars of my cage. This state is so ordinary for me that I rarely even think about. It came to mind today only because I went out for physical therapy and then as soon as I got home, I got naked as usual. While I was undressing it crossed my mind that what I’m doing is far from typical.

My post the other day that mentioned purple panties drew a little extra attention. One person wistfully noted that he badly wanted his wife to require him to wear women’s underwear all the time. He said that she is unresponsive to this request. He bought some anyway and wears panties now and then. For the record, between me and shopping trips with Mrs. Lion, I have a fairly extensive collection of frillies. Most of the items are still brand-new never worn.

I’m not complaining. If Mrs. Lion decides to put me in panties, we’re all set. Meanwhile, it’s impossible to ignore the fact that I’m naked and hairless. Speaking of which, hair has been growing back and it’s time for waxing again. Mrs. Lion reduced the area she removes hair. Of course, she removes all pubic and butt hair. She also cleans off my chest, underarms, shoulders, upper legs, and back. Essentially the only fur I have left is on my arms and lower legs.

I asked Mrs. Lion to remove all this fur. I confess that I like the way I look. There was one time a few weeks ago when my hairlessness caused me some concern. It was during the long power failure. We decided to go to the local community center for showers. The men’s locker room is open with no place to hide. Even if I wrap the towel around my middle, my hairless chest and underarms, not to mention my legs are visible for one and all to see.

We went at a time I figured that few, if any, people would be in the locker rooms. When I arrived and undressed to shower, I was the only one there. After my shower, when walking back to the locker where I put my clothes, another man was nearby changing into his gym shorts. He glanced my way and I’m sure noted my lack of fur. I didn’t see any change of expression, no gasp of horror, just a glance over to me and then he resumed undressing.

I have no idea what I expected. What could a stranger possibly say? “My God! He has no body hair!” That’s just silly. Also, why should I care what a stranger thinks of my personal grooming. Ironically, when I had surgery for removing a kidney stone, I didn’t give a second thought to the fact that the entire surgical team would see my lack of pubic hair. When I had to go back to the doctor’s office to remove a stent, again I was naked in front of his nurse and the surgeon himself. I wasn’t embarrassed. I didn’t even think about it.

I know it doesn’t matter how others will react. I’m me and I come packaged with almost no fur. Big deal. My blasé attitude would certainly disappear if someone I know wasn’t aware of our kink, saw me this way. A friend would almost certainly comment. At this point, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t blush. Though deep down, I’d be, at least momentarily, embarrassed.

That’s not a bad thing. After all, part of my kink is this sort of gentle humiliation. It’s no different than wearing panties. It’s a kind of naughty fun.