I am not complaining. Really, I’m not. Sex and BDSM play have returned to last place in our schedules. It isn’t intentional. Changing weather gives Mrs. Lion painful sinus headaches. A dinner out leaves us too full. Work and the dog were too stressful. Lots of reasons. I get it. Now, sitting here on Monday afternoon, it occurs to me that we have just been together from 1 PM on Friday until Mrs. Lion left for work this morning. We had plenty of downtime over the weekend. We only went out once. That was for dinner on Sunday night.

I know that Mrs. Lion didn’t have a headache all weekend. She did some chores on Sunday afternoon and watched the Seahawk football game with me. Couldn’t we have done some play during the afternoon on Friday, all day Saturday, or Sunday morning and early afternoon? We could. It’s the same old problem. I’m the only one who wants sex, and I can’t demand action. This is the big drawback of one-sided sex. It isn’t that Mrs. Lion doesn’t want to do something with me. It’s just not a priority.

Her solution, as she wrote in her post, “Warm Lion,” was to avoid promising to do anything from chores to sex. That way, she reasoned, she wouldn’t feel bad about failing to complete her to-do list. Did it work? It might have for her, not so much for me.

You may have noticed that I’m no longer advertising my book. I’ve decided to take it out of publication. The self-publishing route isn’t working for me. I plan to rewrite it and try to sell it to an agent. Either people who read sex blogs don’t read non-porn by bloggers, or the book isn’t appealing. Either way, it’s out of print. By the way, we have a link to our podcast. These are free audio versions of our posts. It has a modest following. I am considering taking that offline too. We can afford to keep up the blog, but the frill of a podcast may end up costing too much.

That’s the news for now. Have a great day!

Did you know that the leading cause of death is birth? The human mortality rate is 100%. Most of us never think about this. There’s a song that I’ve always liked, “Enjoy Yourself It’s Later Than You Think.” It’s particularly relevant to us. It’s way too easy to put things off until it is too late. This is particularly true of sexual fun as we age. Our ability to enjoy sex changes. It takes longer to orgasm. More intense stimulation is needed to arouse us. Time isn’t our friend.

There isn’t much information out there about aging and sex for kinksters. I’ve been interested in this topic for years and may have some useful information to suggest. First and foremost, sexual activity is not only possible, but it’s also desirable at any age. Sure, we change as we grow older, but we can still have fun.

Unsurprisingly, male chastity is easier as we age. The refractory period (the time needed to recharge and ejaculate again after orgasm) grows longer. Arousal is less urgent as well. While we males can still get spontaneous erections all of our lives, they don’t happen as often. Direct stimulation is often needed. Erections are less firm as well. Little pills–Cialis,etc.–help make us harder. They don’t turn us on or make it easier for us to get aroused. All they do is improve blood flow into the penis. Cialis helps me stay nice and stiff for Mrs. Lion.

There is confusion between the refractory period and the amount of time a man needs to recover between orgasms. For example, a fifty-year-old man might take a couple of days to “feel like” coming. His actual refractory period may be under an hour. If you are curious to test this, try a little experiment. I tried it years ago with surprising results. You need a partner for this. It’s simple and fun. Wait until you haven’t ejaculated in several days. Your partner will masturbate you to orgasm every half hour. She jerks you off to orgasm and then starts a 30-minute timer. At the end of 30 minutes, she does it again. It will take longer and longer, and eventually, no semen will come out. Keep this up until she can’t make you hard after trying for ten minutes.

When I tried this with a friend, I was convinced I might come twice and lose interest. The first time was easy. Thirty minutes later, she began again. I was surprised that I got hard rather quickly. I came after about ten minutes of being jerked off. The next time it took longer, but I still managed to come. She gave up after four orgasms because it was near time for dinner, and my penis was getting sore. I imagine I had at least one more in me. Try it yourself and see.

On the other end of the spectrum, I’ve learned that I begin to lose interest in sex after about two weeks without ejaculating. Yes, I can get hard, but it takes more work, and it isn’t easy to get me off. When I was in my thirties and forties, I would get hornier each day I went without. After fifty, long-term chastity is much less of an issue for a man. A shorter-term lockup with lots of teasing between orgasms might be more fun for both partners.

Spanking and domestic discipline haven’t changed much over the years. Skin tends to thin and become more brittle with age. I suppose this applies to the butt as well as other places. I haven’t noticed any appreciable differences over the years. Well, maybe one comes to mind. I feel the results of a spanking longer than when I was younger. I’ve noticed that after Mrs. Lion finishes, some of my skin feels leathery. Over time (three days or so), it stings sometimes. If I use a good skin lotion back there, the effects are reduced. I’ve started applying CeraVe skin lotion every day or so after I shower. It seems to help keep my skin soft and reduce some of the ill effects. This is sensible at any age.

The biggest change is in flexibility. As we age, our ability to safely and comfortably flex our joints diminishes. This comes up when it comes to bondage and other body positions needed for sex or kink. Knees get sore quickly. Staying on all-fours, particularly on a hard surface, gets problematic. We are all different. Pay attention to how it feels to be in a particular position. If it is difficult, find another, an easier one to assume.

Both women and men find reaching orgasm more difficult with age. Perseverance and sometimes mechanical aids (vibrators, etc.) will make things easier. Some people feel that if they have difficulty getting their partners off, it means there is a loss of love or attraction. It usually doesn’t. Sexual response is affected by many non-sexual things. Stress, lack of sleep, weight gain, and many other factors can screw up sexual response.

The key to kink, as we age, is flexibility and understanding. Experiment and adapt as time passes. Change the rules of the games. Change male chastity from a marathon to a sprint. You don’t have to stop what you like to do. You may need to work out new ways to do them.

Mrs. Lion took off my male chastity device (you can see the marks on the head of my penis) and loaded my balls with clothespins.

Friday night Mrs. Lion tried out some new clothespins I ordered from Amazon. Unfortunately, she didn’t take any pictures. These weren’t very stingy items when she put them on my balls. She also put one on each of my nipples. That was painful. Nipple pinches produce a unique sort of pain that I truly dislike. Of course, that’s why she makes sure she pinches them when we play.

Plastic clothespins tend to hurt more than wood.

Clothespins have always been a favorite of my lioness. She tends to restrict BDSM to my balls. Covering them with clothespins is a no-brainer. For this purpose, she has a variety of items to select. The image at the top of this post shows my balls covered with standard wooden pins. They hurt when she puts them on some spots, but not so much on others. However, as the quantity builds, it is quite uncomfortable.

Dollhouse clothespins are the worst!

She has learned that quickly removing a clothespin hurts more than putting it on. We have a large collection of different kinds. To make things more interesting, we have wood clothespins with rough stair tread material glued inside. They are a lot more painful! We also have various plastic clothespins with different grip strengths. Speaking of that, you can test how severe a clothespin is by pinching the web between your thumb and forefinger. Doing that will let you know what you should or shouldn’t put on a man’s tender cock and balls.

The absolute champion of painful pinchers is the tiny dollhouse clothespin. These little monsters hurt anywhere you put them. Mrs. Lion likes to apply them around the rim of my penis head. I can barely handle two. I’ll do anything to get her to take them off. They are also horrible when applied to my balls.

The best thing about these pinchy toys is that they are safe to use and cheap to buy. As long as you test the grip first and don’t leave them on more than ten minutes at a time, they represent a great way to make a man sorry he has that tender skin so available to you.

Things have been rather quiet here the last six months or so. Not silent. Mrs. Lion spanks me as needed. But there hasn’t been much play. Mrs. Lion defines play as a synonym for sex. I don’t. Play for me refers to BDSM which can include sex but isn’t necessarily edging or ejaculation. Spanking is not play to me.

This came to mind for a couple of reasons. My post yesterday (“Balls!“) included a picture of my balls decorated with over thirty clothespins. Now that’s play! We have new restraints that have only been used once about a month ago. It’s true that Mrs. Lion also tied up my balls once or twice as well. It seems that we are interacting less in general. I wonder if she’s losing interest in play. I sure hope not.

We may be suffering some of Mrs. Lion’s famous inertia. It comes over her from time to time. She knows I’ve been grumbling about it for a while. If there is something I can do to help, I hope she lets me know. I miss the fun and the closeness when we are more active. This is one of those posts designed to update you and perhaps inspire her.

On another front (rear, really), It’s been two days, and I still feel my most recent spanking. Mrs. Lion says she doesn’t remember what she did to make this one more effective. I have no idea except that I’m still sore. There is a rough patch on each cheek that seems to be to blame for my discomfort. I guess practice makes perfect for domestic discipline.