By:
In: Punishment, Lion's Journal, Spanking

August went out with a bang. Literally. Mrs. Lion bruised my bottom on Monday night. My spanking was particularly painful. Mrs. Lion used a paddle made from thick conveyor belt material. This is the stuff used to move very heavy rocks and other pointed objects. In other words, it’s tough. This particular paddle has large holes in it. Some people think that holes in a paddle allow airflow and that prevents an air cushion from forming and lightening the blow. That’s simply not true.

The real effect of the holes is to provide more edges to trap and bruise the skin. When Mrs. Lion swings hard, the flesh on my bottom is pushed into the holes. If the holes are chamfered, sloped edges, no damage is done. If the holes have vertical walls, there is a nasty pinching effect that generally enhances bruising. Sometimes you can see the pattern of the holes on my skin. You can see them in the image of my butt after Monday’s spanking on the left.

Mrs. Lion is becoming considerably more serious when she punishes me. I think she likes to experiment with different paddles. Regardless of the implement, her objective is to make a strong, visible impression. She says I have made it worse on myself by suggesting she use more than one paddle in a session. I guess she is right.

Based on my experience as a top, I know that there are two basic spanking effects: red color with a sting, and deeper pain and bruising. Given a choice, I will opt for the deeper pain every time. I hate the sting. The lighter, wood paddles generate sting and rarely bruise. The heavier tools with smaller striking areas will produce deeper pain and bruising.

She has learned to disregard my yelps and screams. They aren’t a reliable indicator of the quality of the punishment. As a spanking progresses, there is a natural loss of sensitivity. After a while, more force is necessary to produce the desired discomfort. Mrs. Lion knows this and does a good job assuring it hurts from beginning to end.

A helpful indicator of how spanking is progressing is the red color produced by the paddle. Everyone reddens differently. Some bottoms turn dark purple-red with very little spanking. Others, like mine, are difficult to get past pink. Mrs. Lion uses color to assure she has covered all of the areas she wants to spank. She wants me to feel sting over my entire lower butt and upper thighs. Did I mention that I really hate sting?

Even a tough-to-redden butt like mine will go from pink to a darker red with sufficient encouragement. It will take a lot of work, but it can be done. I wouldn’t mind a bit if Mrs. Lion stays with pink. I suspect she will want to go for dark red at some point.

The second phase of the two-part spanking is with the heavier implement. The conveyer belt, rubber paddles are in this category. They inflict a different sort of pain. It’s deeper and slower to be fully felt. Some describe this as “thuddy”. I prefer it to sting. When applied with sufficient force, the marks these tools make will last for days and will be felt almost as long as they are visible.

The most unpleasant spanking begins with lots of sting which is administered until I begin to lose sensitivity and my bottom is the shade of red that Mrs. Lion likes. Even if I lose sensitivity, if the color isn’t right, she can hit hard and fast until my reaction and skin color is what she wants. At that point, she can bring in the thud.

If this sounds cruel, it isn’t. As an adult male, I am quite difficult to impress with a spanking. Bear in mind that for many years before we started domestic discipline I received “play” spankings that were every bit as mean as some of Mrs. Lion’s punishments. It takes a lot of work to get my attention with a punishment spanking. Mrs. Lion knows this and has been working to assure that I don’t mistake punishment for play

I didn’t make that mistake on Monday night!

By:
In: Punishment, Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal

The other day Mrs. Lion posed the question as the title of her post, Is He Looking for Another Spanking? She was referring to some things I said that bothered her. She appeared to be trying to figure out where the threshold is between a little snarky and spankable behavior. She wondered if I would earn a spanking two days in a row.

I appreciate her thoughtful approach. But I think at this early stage in disciplining me for behavior that upsets her, this may be a way to avoid the inevitable confrontation that punishing me creates. It’s not that I resist her demand that I get into position for a spanking. I don’t. I don’t even ask why she is spanking me. Usually, she tells me. Sometimes, she will tell me that I will be spanked but doesn’t explain why at that moment. I’m fine with that.

In the cold morning light, I think that if I do something that makes her wonder if it is sufficiently annoying to warrant punishment, almost by definition it is. At least in the beginning, it seems to me that if the thought of punishing me goes through her mind after I do something, that is sufficient grounds to spank me.

Mrs. Lion wants to be fair. Her strong desire to treat me fairly seems to be getting in the way of taking the next step in our disciplinary relationship. It’s not that she is unwilling to punish me for upsetting her. She demonstrated that last week. She bruised my buns to let me know she was unhappy with my behavior. That was a great start.

I think the next step is for Mrs. Lion to turn off that filter. If she starts thinking about whether or not something I’ve done deserves punishment, the filter is on. I’m proposing that for the foreseeable future, the simple act of asking herself that question automatically earns the answer, “Yes, he needs to be spanked.”

There is no doubt that for a while until I learn better communication skills, I might be getting several spankings a week. I certainly won’t like this. That’s not the point. We both agree that I need to be more careful in the way I speak to her. I need to think about what am about to say in terms of whether or not it might upset her. I don’t intentionally try to make her angry or sad. I can be thoughtless.

For example, Mrs. Lion gave me a haircut on Saturday. She’s getting quite good at it. However, she made a little slip in a very visible spot. I commented on it because I worried that people might see it and think I look silly. This hurt her feelings. After all, she worked hard to cut my hair and she rightly believed I should be grateful for her effort. She’s right. I’m very grateful that she does this for me. The fact that she didn’t do it perfectly doesn’t change my gratitude at all. I was thoughtless being critical.

Mrs. Lion was quiet after dinner on Saturday night. I finally asked her what was wrong. She told me that she felt badly about my comment regarding my haircut. Was that comment a spankable offense? The fact that she reacted so strongly and felt bad tells me it is.

I’m pretty sure that Mrs. Lion didn’t think spanking me would make her feel better about my thoughtless remark. She might be right. However, given our disciplinary relationship, I think I need to learn to be careful about saying things like that. We’ve established that consistent spankings for misbehavior of any sort condition me to behave the way she wants.

The challenge is for her to consciously decide to consistently respond to any thoughtlessness or other behaviors that cause her upset with punishment. Until she has developed the same level of consistency she has when I spill food on my shirt or forget to do a chore, it seems to me that she has to always err on the side of punishing for very minor offenses. It worked for us before in terms of chores and rules. It should work equally well for upsetting behavior.

I admire Mrs. Lion for her fairness filter. I just think it’s a little broken. That haircut comment was seriously upsetting. Based on our agreement, that certainly earned me a spanking. I know it’s going to be difficult for her to work through feeling bad and focus instead on educating me. I think she needs to turn the filter off for my sake.

Guess what? She spanked me!

By:
In: Reviews, Lion's Journal

When I think about sex toys, my mind never drifts toward pillows. Yet, Mrs. Lion and I have long struggled to find a really good position for me when I’m spanked or when she wishes to peg me. I always thought that if I was on my knees, I would be presenting my rear perfectly for her use. The first time we tried this when I had earned a spanking, I was flat on my tummy in seconds. It hurt too much for me to stay in that position.

We tried stacking bed pillows on the edge of the bed with me lying on top of them in order to get me at a height where my bottom was stretched tight and presented nicely. They were too squishy and just couldn’t hold me still.

The problem is simple but very difficult to solve. Mrs. Lion likes me draped over the edge of the bed. In that position, my rear end isn’t stretched it all. Some folds of skin even develop. The area Mrs. Lion needs to spank — the lower half of my butt and my upper thighs — is draped below the edge of the bed. It’s uncomfortable for Mrs. Lion to try to spank me over her lap. That position stretches the butt nicely and puts it in an easily accessible location for spanking but doesn’t work for Mrs. Lion.

I had received an email from a company that sells very interesting toys. It’s called Tabutoys. One item on their site was brand-new to me. It is a triangular-shaped foam pillow explicitly designed to put the rear end in a very accessible position: the Pillo. The manufacturer intended it to allow a woman to present her rear for penetration. However, it seemed to me that this product might be the answer to our spanking and anal challenges. I ordered one.

It arrived beautifully packed in a large black box. The positioning pillow itself is made of a hard, yet-yielding foam. It has a waterproof inner cover with a soft fabric cover on the outside. The outside cover is washable and the inside cover protects the foam and can be wiped off if needed. My theory was that if I put the pillow on the edge of the bed so that my thigh joints draped over the edge, my butt would be higher and because of the triangular shape of the pillow, it would be at an angle more accessible to Mrs. Lion.

I was concerned that it might not be wide enough to accommodate me or it might not be firm enough to actually hold me in position. It turned out that it was plenty wide and was absolutely firm enough to keep me right where she wants me. We were both surprised at how well it actually works. Its first use was for a punishment spanking. It’s hard for me to be objective about this but I believe that right from the start her swats hurt more. It felt similar to the spanking I received when on my knees.

When used for fun, it provides a very firm support for anal play including pegging. Since my weight is distributed over my entire body, there is none of the fatigue I normally feel when on my knees for a long period of time. Also, because this is a stable position, the softness of the mattress doesn’t make me wobble when Mrs. Lion is using a dildo.

This product isn’t cheap. It retails for $95. It’s worth it! This rather simple design does its intended job perfectly. The quality is very good and the service from Tabutoys is excellent. What started out as an odd idea has turned out to be one of the most useful additions to our kink collection. It solves a very real problem for us.

Click here to visit the product page.

Click here for Tabutoys home page.

By:
In: Spanking, BDSM, Lion's Journal

Mrs. Lion said that I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be punished. It’s true that more than two weeks have passed since I’ve done anything to earn one. She said that I should probably get a punishment spanking just to remind me. She doesn’t like the idea of a maintenance spanking because it generally is too mild. I agree about that. I also agree that I probably should be reminded what’s in store for me if I get out of line. It sounds like we are completely in sync.

Then she wrote that she wanted to lock me into the spiked jockstrap to help jumpstart sex for me. Another good idea. Then, things got strange. She said that she would make me wear the prickly jockstrap for more than an hour instead of spanking me. She went on to say that she knew that it wasn’t the same thing, but that’s what she wanted to do. I was confused until I thought about how Mrs. Lion operates.

For some reason, she tends to only do one lion-related thing a day. I never figured out why, but that’s how it seems to work out. I don’t think she intends it, but it’s her pattern. So it wasn’t entirely surprising that she would only put me in the jockstrap, a BDSM activity instead of spanking me, a domestic discipline activity. I can’t see any reason why she can’t do both. I’m not in love with the idea of either, but I can’t see any relationship between the two that would cause one to disqualify the other.

Terminology aside, maintenance or punishment spankings, she has a point about reminding me what one feels like. I have a poor memory when it comes to pain. I know that I don’t like being spanked, but after a couple of weeks, the memory isn’t strong enough to act as an effective deterrent. It may seem cruel to remind me by making me suffer through one for no apparent reason. It might be like a disciplinary mental health day. It could help me avoid actually committing offenses that would earn me punishment.

In fact, my mental health could truly benefit from a seriously sore bottom. I’ve been thinking about this. First of all, it’s true that I don’t vividly remember how unhappy a disciplinary spanking makes me. Because of this, I find myself getting less focused on obedience. The chances I will get into trouble become much better.

I also lapse into a sort of inertia. I don’t actively feel Mrs. Lion’s authority. I suspect this isn’t just because I am getting lazy. I think she tends to “forget” her role if she doesn’t punish me regularly. The more time that passes between spankings, the less interested she seems to be in keeping me in strict check. It’s our old inertia issue.

For reasons I can’t exactly understand, I get a sense of love and security when Mrs. Lion is my disciplining wife. I am happier when she is firmly in control. Conversely, when she doesn’t follow through on something, I feel less secure and I worry if something is wrong with us.

None of this is pathological. I quickly get over any bad feelings. Her forgetting and not disciplining me don’t make my life worse. When she follows through and keeps me on my toes I am happier. I think she is too. It can’t feel good to forget to keep a promise. I know it feels good to her when she is actively watching for and punishing infractions.

We just have to remember what works for us and to follow through.

[Mrs. Lion replies — Well, the good news is that Lion earned a punishment not far into the afternoon. While I was reading this post, he rightly alerted me that I hadn’t put him in the prickly jockstrap before my post had published. And why was that? I was being nice enough to not interrupt him while he was writing. This is a nicety he does not share since he interrupted my reading his post. So now, I’m commenting just after the prickly jockstrap went on, he’ll get spanked in a few hours, depending on how long I feel like allowing those nasty little spikes to bite into his cock and balls.]