Don’t you love emails with the headline, “Congratulations! You’re eligible to get identity theft protection!” One of my credit card companies congratulated me because they generously offered to charge me $15 a month for the service. Generosity abounds. How, you may ask, does this relate to male chastity?

The answer is painfully obvious. Most men make a similar offer to their potential keyholders when they propose being locked in a chastity device. The typical offer goes something like this:

“If you lock me up, I’ll have to give you oral sex anytime you want.”

Gee, thanks. Won’t you do that now? The typical male chastity fantasy goes something like this: The keyholder locks the poor soul’s penis in a male chastity device. Then she informs him that he can’t have an orgasm until he gets her off twenty times (or whatever number you pick). Desperate to ejaculate, he becomes an enthusiastic pussy eater and brings her ecstasy forever and ever.

The problem with this scenario is that if the guy needs to be blackmailed into pleasing his partner, why does she want to bother with him in the first place? That’s the fatal flaw with most male chastity scenarios.  It’s time for a reality check.

What’s the real purpose of wearing a male chastity device?

There are probably two. First, having your penis locked in a male chastity device that you can’t unlock is a very exciting control fantasy. It’s very arousing to imagine being horny and not even being able to have an erection. The second and most practical purpose is to prevent masturbation. An effective male chastity device will make masturbation close to impossible without removing it.

Now we get to the second level of male chastity fantasy: security. The fantasies feature devices that can’t be removed without a key. The chaste male’s penis is hopelessly trapped in the device. Nope, that’s not really true. Any truly inescapable device is going to be very uncomfortable to wear. What we really want is a device that his difficult to escape. After all, you asked to be locked up. Why would you want to defeat what you dreamed about?

This all boils down to understanding what’s really going on. Male chastity is for the benefit of the male who wants to be controlled. There is no concrete benefit for his partner. It’s extra work for her. He wants this. She agrees to play the game. That’s not to say there can’t be real benefits from playing.

When I asked Mrs. Lion to lock me up, the conversation took a turn I didn’t expect. She asked me why I wanted her to lock me in the male chastity device. I answered, “So only you can give me an orgasm.” She looked puzzled. I explained that I masturbated a couple of times a week. She was shocked. Mrs. Lion had no idea that I did that.

It was my turn to be surprised. Didn’t she know that all guys jerked off? Nope, she didn’t. What’s more, she hatee the idea that I was doing it. She immediately told me that if she was in charge, the first rule was that I couldn’t jerk off. Truth be told, if she weren’t going to lock me in a male chastity device, I probably would have done it behind her back. With the device locked on, I would be sufficiently deterred to obey her.

She didn’t expect me to want to wear the device for long. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to make any long-term commitment. We agreed on a six-month trial period. She later told me that she figured that I would ask to be released before the trial period ended.

To her surprise, I stuck with it. We went through several devices before I found one I could wear 24/7 without irritation. By the end of the six months, wearing a chastity device was a normal part of my life. Since I could no longer access my penis, I didn’t masturbate. I stayed locked full-time for over three years. I had to take a break when I had shoulder and, later, spinal surgery. By that time, I had pretty much forgotten about jerking off. It’s been ten years since the last time I masturbated.

The last time was the night I asked to be locked up, and Mrs. Lion announced that I was no longer allowed to jerk off. She told me to do it one last time while she watched. At the time, I thought it wouldn’t be so bad if she wanted to turn jerking off into a spectator sport. It would be hot to “perform” for her.


That was the last time. The very last time I got myself off. At this point, I don’t think I could do it if she told me to. She made a rule I can’t break.

Listen to this post.