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In: Erections

Lion went to his doctor appointment yesterday to learn how to use the boner injection. I have to say, it was weird watching an older female doctor matter-of-factly feeling Lion up. Apparently, not too many wives/girlfriends go with their husbands/boyfriends because either the doctor or nurse thanked me for being there. I don’t know if that’s because the men find it embarrassing or the women do.

On the way home from the doctor, we stopped to pick up the magic weenie potion. Lion already laid in a supply of syringes, but the drug came with some. I guess they want you to be able to enjoy it as soon as possible. I don’t have to tell you that Lion did.

I assumed it would be better if he was lying down for the injection. I guess that’s why I figured I’d be the one doing it. However, you are specifically told to inject while sitting or standing. Pull the weenie taut, choose your target and hit the bullseye. The nurse suggested we pre-fill the syringes once we figure out the dosage. We must have been concentrating on the difficult aspects of it because that suggestion was like a revelation. Duh. That would make it easier than having to take the time to fill the syringe when you’re trying to get busy.

Speaking of which, when he came into the bedroom sporting his woody, I set to work with my hand. It never works well when he’s on the bed so I suggested I suck him. It was going okay, but it occurred to me that it would take just as long, if not longer, to get him to the edge because I’d just gone ahead as though he was aroused. Hard weenie equals arousal, after all. Not anymore.

Now the question is, does he shoot up before we start, or once the preliminaries are done? I mean, the erection is immediate. On one hand, it seems logical to wait until foreplay has him in the mood. On the other hand, that means a break in the action. We’ll need to get the dosage right and figure out how long it lasts. If it lasts long enough, he can inject before we start and we’ll have time to do what we need. If it doesn’t he’ll have to inject after we start.

The way I see it, there are two answers we need. Number one is how hard he gets. Number two is how long it lasts. If we adjust so he gets a stronger erection, does that make it last too long (i.e. the dangerous amount of time)? Tonight, he’ll go up a dose and see what happens.

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In: Health and safety

As part of my research into erectile dysfunction (ED), I came across a startling bit of information from Memorial Sloan Kettering, one of the world’s leading cancer hospitals and research centers. They had this to say about erections:

“The tissue that causes you to get an erection (erectile tissue) is a muscle. Going long periods of time without an erection is unhealthy for erectile tissue and may damage it.

We believe having erections keeps erectile tissue healthy.”

This is the first time I’ve encountered this information. It doesn’t say orgasms are needed, just erections. Sloan Kettering has a lot of experience with ED. It’s a common issue with prostate and some other cancers and their therapies. This advice suggests that practicing male chastity should include regular opportunities to allow erections.

Mrs. Lion always unlocked me every two or three days. While unlocked, she teased me. I had plenty of frustrating erections. Practicing long-term male chastity may need to take this male conditioning into account. I know that there are men who have successfully stayed locked up for long periods and still maintain their ability to get hard. Perhaps when we tried to get hard inside our devices, that provided sufficient exercise to maintain penis health. It makes sense to consider this advice when doing long-term lockups.

One of the most frequent questions that we get is whether penis size is affected by long-term wearing of a male chastity device. I wore a device for more than three years with only the regular exercise sessions that Mrs. Lion gave me. There was no change in size as a result of being locked up. I haven’t heard of any erectile tissue damage as a result of wearing a male chastity device. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen.

No one has studied the effects of long-term male chastity device wear. Since people are more likely to comment if they have a problem, it’s likely that the risk of damage caused by a male chastity device is low. Based on my experience and what I’ve read, the following suggestions provide a sensible framework for safely practicing enforced male chastity:

  • If wearing a device causes irritation of any kind, immediately remove the device. A properly fitted male chastity device can be worn without any irritation or discomfort. Adding lube or creams to relieve irritation might cover more serious damage later. Invest in a device that fits without hurting you.
  • Stay clean. Closed tubes like the Holy Trainer can breed bacteria. Urine can remain inside and cause problems for you. Open cages like the Jail Bird are easier to keep clean. Even they get build-ups of body oils and other materials. If your device begins to smell, remove it and clean the device and your penis. It makes sense to remove any device at least weekly to inspect your penis and clean both it and the device. I bought an inexpensive ultrasound jewelry cleaner and use it to deep clean my devices. I put a capful of ultrasonic detergent into the machine and clean for ten minutes. Doing this monthly will keep your device in great shape. Some people soak their devices in vinegar. This will dissolve body oils but doesn’t do as good a job as an ultrasound cleaner.
  • Get regular “exercise.” Maintain penis health by getting regular erections. Mrs. Lion exercised me by edging me a couple of times a week. Exercise is not an excuse for more orgasms. Exercise sessions are good times to inspect to make sure there is no irritation. Also, by exercising, Mrs. Lion and I had a chance to share intimacy without more than some hand attention.

Despite the fantasy scenarios, manageable male chastity is a game played by two. The objective is to control orgasms. In the beginning, this usually involves a male chastity device. Over time, it can evolve into free-range male chastity. The objective is the same, and the rules are just as strict. I haven’t had a single orgasm that wasn’t provided by Mrs. Lion since 2013. Erections don’t count. I can have all of them I want.

By:
In: Living with chastity

Today is the day I see the urologist and learn how to inject Trimix into my penis. I’m a little sad that it has come to this. No man likes to admit that he needs medical help to get hard. Erections are more than symbols of male arousal. They represent potency and strength, the essence of being male. Impotent doesn’t just refer to the inability to satisfy a woman. It means weak and ineffective.

I realize that my problem is medical, but it carries a lot of other baggage. For example, did I decide to ask Mrs. Lion to lock me into a male chastity device as a way to disguise my flagging ability to get hard? After all, if I’m locked in a male chastity device, I am prevented from getting an erection. It’s an excellent way to cover up the inability to get one without a device.

At the time I asked to be locked up, I could get hard quite easily. I had a secret. The few times I tried penetration from behind (doggy style) or missionary, I lost my erection before we could get started. If Mrs. Lion rode me, I didn’t have a chance to get soft and intercourse worked. When I asked her to have sex this way, I also asked her to ride me until she was fully satisfied. Then, I asked her to jerk me off as my reward. In my mind, I was playing out a sort of submissive fantasy. I didn’t invent the scenario as a way to preserve my potency. At least, I didn’t think I did.

Looking at it now, I found ways to keep sex going with my erectile issues. I didn’t think there was anything wrong with me. I was able to have sex. Mrs. Lion could get me off with oral attention or with her hand. I could satisfy her. I blamed my inability to initiate on my lifelong shyness when it came to initiating sex. I didn’t know that even though we were having regular sex, Mrs. Lion was unhappy about my lack of aggression.

I thought that wearing a male chastity device was a practical solution to that problem. It eliminated the mating dance that I had so much trouble starting. It seemed to work. It was sexy fun for me, and Mrs. Lion said she liked it too. She likes writing posts about our activities. It looked like our new dynamic was working well. It wasn’t.

During this same time, Mrs. Lion lost interest in sex for her. It may have been the result of menopause. Loss of libido is a fairly common outcome. Maybe hers was more my fault. I put her into a role that was sexually stressful for her. Perhaps the loss of libido was her reaction to my adaptation to my loss of potency.

chemical help

I wondered if generic Viagra (Sildenafil) would make sex easier. I got a prescription for it, and it worked.  I had great boners that were rock-hard. I loved it. I didn’t talk about when I took it. Mrs. Lion was largely unaware that the blue pill was helping me. When generic Cialis (Tadalafil) became available, I tried it. The great boners continued. Unlike Sildenafil, Tadalafil was long-lasting. It was effective for thirty hours after taking it. It helped with our play.

The effects were temporary. After a while, I began getting soft soon after stimulation started. It was the old problem coming back. I said that I was broken. Mrs. Lion disagreed. She wasn’t wrong. I wasn’t broken. I could still get hard and get off. It wasn’t reliable. Most of the time, I would lose my erection mid-blowjob. Jerking me off rarely worked. The problem kept getting worse.

I keep track of my orgasms. I started in 2016, so when we wrote about sexual activity, I could be sure I was accurate about how many orgasms I was getting. When I look at the spreadsheet, it’s clear that I was ejaculating less. Since Mrs. Lion wasn’t trying to train me to come less often, something else was going on.

For a long time, I thought that the reduction in activity was due to age. We are supposed to slow down as we age. Still, I wanted sex. My desire wasn’t simmering. I still boiled inside my head. Mrs. Lion said she would be happy if I came more often. Yet I didn’t. I couldn’t. The pills weren’t helping.

That was when I had to face the horrible reality. I was becoming impotent. There were no obvious physical reasons. My prostate was in good shape. Both blood tests and palpation revealed it was fine. I have type 2 diabetes, but it has always been well-controlled. My a1c is 5.9, a sub-diabetic value. I don’t have cancer, and I’m not taking any drugs that affect my libido. In other words, there is no obvious medical reason for my problem.

Maybe it’s psychological. I’m not depressed, or at least I wasn’t before the current situation. My behavior hasn’t changed. I’m sleeping as well as ever. In other words, no symptoms. That doesn’t mean some subtle physical imbalance has changed me. I want sex with Mrs. Lion.

the next step

I’m at the next option to get my potency back. I will inject a drug into my penis. The drug will dilate the spongy tissue in my penis and create an erection. The erection should be strong enough to allow penetration and stay hard between thirty minutes and an hour. Later today, I’ll get a lesson on how to inject the drug and a prescription for it. Later this afternoon, I’ll start injecting. It will take several tries with stronger and stronger doses before I get the result I want. Sexual arousal isn’t required. The erection the drug produces will probably be about ninety percent of the hardness I am capable of achieving. When Mrs. Lion arouses me, it will reach full strength.

I’m happy about this outcome. It means we can have sex again. Maybe Mrs. Lion will let me mount her from behind the way we used to enjoy it. Maybe we can have anal sex again. I dream of both. I also want her to ride me again. I miss the connection. I doubt that Mrs. Lion will get her libido back, but maybe she’ll have fun too. I know these are selfish thoughts. I can’t help having them. It’s been more than five years since I’ve been inside her. Obviously, sex won’t be spontaneous. I’ll have to inject the drug and wait for it to take effect. Still, it’s better than nothing.

am i a fraud?

I used enforced male chastity as a way to help fix a sexual problem. Yes, I’m turned on by the idea of being locked in a male chastity device. We had a lot of fun with our play. With or without a male chastity device, Mrs. Lion continues to control when I get to ejaculate. I haven’t masturbated since 2013 when she made a rule that I couldn’t do it.

I’ve written a lot about male chastity. Our blog is in its tenth year and we’ve written over 6,100 posts. In all that time I never suggested that male chastity is a way to cover up a male sexual dysfunction. I didn’t admit it to myself. As it turns out, wearing a male chastity device is also a good way to disguise a woman’s loss of sexual interest as well I supposed there’s nothing wrong with this unusual way of maintaining sexual balance in a relationship.

Maybe I needed a decade and complete impotence to face this. It doesn’t change anything. Both of us continue to get value from our power exchange. Our love continues to grow. Despite our handicaps, we still have a lot of fun. We’re still playing. Even though I have trouble with sex, Mrs. Lion still controls the orgasms I’m able to have.