Lion didn’t want to pick from the box o’fun last night. He asked if we could put it off a day. I agreed, but in the back of my mind I always wonder if things like this are a test. Is he trying to see if I’ll hold him to what we agreed on? My theory has always been that things happen and we need to adjust for it. However, that could be seen as me falling back into old habits.
For example, Lion has been feeling sad. He thinks he’s asking too much of me. He thinks I don’t have/make time for him. He’s worried I don’t love him. There’s a lot going on inside his brain lately. When he gets like this, I wonder if I should be forceful and tell him we’re doing what I had planned no matter how he feels. Or do I back off and let him feel his feelings until he’s ready to proceed? On one hand, I know he wants me to take charge. On the other hand, I don’t want to downplay his feelings.
On the plus side, I think Lion is feeling a little better today. I don’t know what changed. Of course, I’m not really sure what prompted the issue to begin with. I mean, I understand what he said and they are valid concerns. I just don’t know what flipped the switch at that particular moment and what flipped it back.
The answer, as it usually is, is we need to communicate better. Despite Lion thinking he’s an open book, he often does just as bad a job as I do at communicating. We’ve both have a lot of work to do.
I’m really just trying to get through the next few weeks. Once my trip is over and I start getting the regular paychecks rolling in again, I think I’ll feel better. Of course, if I can figure out my job, that would be great too. That will take longer than a few weeks. [Lion — I’m not feeling any better. Maybe a more forceful approach would help. Certainly, starting earlier helps. Also, moving out of the bedroom is good too.]
