When I snuggled over to Lion last night and started pinching his nipples, he said he didn’t like that. I know. Too bad. I like doing it because I know he doesn’t like it. Then he said he was having trouble catching his breath. I don’t think it’s a big problem. It happens to me sometimes too. No need for ambulances and paramedics. When he was okay again, I was trying to get something going and he wasn’t interested. He said he just didn’t feel like doing anything. Okay. Fair enough. I stayed snuggled close, but I stopped trying to get his motor running. However, this morning it’s got me wondering.
Recently, we’ve been having communication problems. Well, it’s not recently. We have them all the time. In the past, he’s wanted me to disregard what he wants. If I want to play with him, he should be available. My argument has always been that things can’t really go anywhere if he isn’t at least slightly aroused or arousable. Ergo, if he says he’s not in the mood, things stop. Halt. None shall pass. But he’s said press on. Does that apply to last night as well?
How do I know when it’s a he’s-not-really-in-the-mood-but-he-can-be-persuaded night or a leave-me-the-hell-alone night? I don’t like to be turned down when I initiate any more than Lion likes it. It doesn’t dissuade me for next time because I realize it’s just a bad night, but if there are a few nights in a row like that, I might be less inclined to try. When it comes on the heals of his saying he should just stop asking for BDSM because it was so long since we did anything, and I just started doing it again, and he said he hopes it’s the start of a new era, I find it confusing.
I know one bad night isn’t going to stop everything. I’m not suggesting he should always be ready. I’m just getting mixed signals.