It may be the late hour. It may be the number of days since his last orgasm. It may be lack of BDSM. For whatever reason, Lion hasn’t been receptive to sex lately. He says he’s been horny. I have no reason to doubt that. He seems to get going, but he runs out of steam before we get to the edge. I’m not giving up. I’m just wondering what to do to help.
I mowed most of the lawn yesterday. It took three tries, but I got all but a tiny portion done. I’d mowed that last time so it’s not bad. I got the longest parts done. Of course, it’s cut long so I’ll need to do it again fairly soon, but that’s a week or more away. I did some other chores and I had enough energy to give Lion attention. I think I might be getting burnt out on the “oh, and the whatsit needs to be changed/cleaned/fixed/watered/etc.” but I will always try to save energy for Lion.
I don’t think he needs a “just because” spanking to help with sex. He may need clothespins or IcyHot or some other form of evilness. I’ll have to let my mind wander and see what I come up with. I’m sure Lion will love to hate whatever it is. It took me a long time to realize that he protests but that doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t want me to do it. The problem is that sometimes he really doesn’t. It’s hard to decipher the whininess from the genuine veto. He doesn’t like when I don’t do things because he doesn’t want to do it. I think he should be able to opt-out of playing if he wants to. What good does it do to make him do something he really doesn’t want to do? I mean, there are times I say I don’t want to make dinner, and there are times I really don’t want to make dinner. Lion has no way of knowing which meaning I’m trying to convey.
I don’t know what the answer is to this conundrum. I just don’t want to disappoint Lion.
[Lion — This is a difficult question. The fantasy BDSM answer is that it shouldn’t matter if I want sore balls or not. I don’t get a choice. In the real world, that’s just not something people can live with. The truth is that I suffer from inertia too. Sometimes it feels like too much trouble to have my balls burned with IcyHot or otherwise tormented. That inertia can be overcome fairly easily. Mrs. Lion likes to use CBT as a sort of prelude to serious sexual stimulation–a painful form of foreplay. That works if I am easily aroused. There are times I don’t get hard when she starts torturing me. That isn’t a signal that she shouldn’t do it. I just need help getting my motor running. In the past (when we were in New York), Mrs. Lion would always get me very hard before starting CBT. That’s what happened before we met as well. I don’t remember anyone just starting to do nasty things to my junk. A hard penis was always required first. The best way to make me enthusiastic about the painful play is to get me aroused first. I think we both forgot that somewhere along the line.]