Fa, La, La, La. La, La, La, Laaaaaah

Deck the balls…

Merry Christmas! A sex blog on Christmas is a little like being naked in church. It’s not exactly the day most people are thinking about the stuff we usually write about. Sex has been on my mind. It felt a little out of place, so I listened to Christmas music. It didn’t work. My mind is definitely below the waist.

The winter solstice has been celebrated for thousands of years. The early Christian church conveniently moved Jesus’ birthday to coincide with it. According to historians, he was born in spring or summer. The church has always been willing to steal holidays from older religions. Christmas is probably the most egregious.

Nevertheless, whatever religion you prefer, this time of year is celebrated. Some believe that the reason for this is that the short days and long, cold nights are depressing. A little fun is in order. I subscribe to that. In fact, this is a perfect time to grant wishes. Most guys who read this blog are probably wishing for a way to get their penises locked into a chastity device. Those who are already locked might enjoy a holiday wank.

The gift of sex is always appropriate. It’s free and easy to wrap and unwrap. Remember, it’s the thought that counts. When it comes to sex, the thought might be applied to coming up with a new way to deliver pleasure. Maybe it’s something you haven’t done in a long time. Maybe it is brand new. Remember, oral sex is always appreciated. No, not for the mailman, please.

An orgasm warms a long, cold winter night. One delivered in a new way is a wonderful thing to find under the tree, so to speak. I can hear Mrs. Lion singing, “Deck the balls with lots of clothespins. Fa, la, la, la, la.” That isn’t my holiday wish; just a thought. I have to admit it’s festive.

However you spend the holiday, I hope you are with people you love and have fun—Merry Christmas from the Lions.