We went out to dinner last night. I guess we were too full to do anything, so we just snuggled. It’s always fine to snuggle. Despite his post from weeks ago, I do like being close to Lion that said we don’t touch a lot. It’s true we don’t touch as much as we used to, but he’s not as active as he once was, and I think that has a little bit to do with it. Anyway, we snuggled under the covers and watched TV.

This morning, Lion sent me an email and said he hoped I didn’t mind that he bought tickets to see “My Fair Lady” in Seattle. I laughed. I can’t think of a more fitting musical for us to see. While he’s not as snobby as Henry Higgins, and I’m not as uncultured as Eliza Doolittle, we are certainly not from the same side of the tracks, as they say. Lion is definitely upper-middle class, and I am mid to lower middle class. Boarding school versus public school. Banker father versus public servant father. You get the idea. My sister also married “up.” (I didn’t the first time, and I didn’t try to this time.) I think it’s hilarious that there’s a musical that could have been written about us.

We have to run the errands we didn’t run over the weekend tonight or tomorrow night. I’m waiting till we hit Costco to get gas since it’s cheaper there. Our football team plays tonight, and we got takeout from Olive Garden, so we wouldn’t have to think about dinner for tonight. Depending on how badly our team is doing, we may turn the game off early, and Lion can have some sexy time. I owe him a plug up his butt.

I’m pretty sure he’d rather be tied to the bed, but even then, I’d have to do something to him. Technically, I could shove the plug up his butt while we watch the game and let it fester. I’m not sure that will have the same effect as having it in while I jerk him off or suck him. I think a butt plug makes things more difficult while I’m yanking on him. It might arouse him to have it in, but as things heat up, it gets in the way. When he clenches, he feels it. That can’t help.

On the other hand, I’m not really trying to help him along. Being in pain while I masturbate him is all part of the game. Of course, being tied up is not necessarily painful. It just takes away his control. That’s really what turns him on. I do have plans for tying him up. He’ll have to be patient. In the meantime, I’ll give him some of what he wants. Or, more accurately, some of what he professes not to like.

Did you know that the leading cause of death is birth? The human mortality rate is 100%. Most of us never think about this. There’s a song that I’ve always liked, “Enjoy Yourself It’s Later Than You Think.” It’s particularly relevant to us. It’s way too easy to put things off until it is too late. This is particularly true of sexual fun as we age. Our ability to enjoy sex changes. It takes longer to orgasm. More intense stimulation is needed to arouse us. Time isn’t our friend.

There isn’t much information out there about aging and sex for kinksters. I’ve been interested in this topic for years and may have some useful information to suggest. First and foremost, sexual activity is not only possible, but it’s also desirable at any age. Sure, we change as we grow older, but we can still have fun.

Unsurprisingly, male chastity is easier as we age. The refractory period (the time needed to recharge and ejaculate again after orgasm) grows longer. Arousal is less urgent as well. While we males can still get spontaneous erections all of our lives, they don’t happen as often. Direct stimulation is often needed. Erections are less firm as well. Little pills–Cialis,etc.–help make us harder. They don’t turn us on or make it easier for us to get aroused. All they do is improve blood flow into the penis. Cialis helps me stay nice and stiff for Mrs. Lion.

There is confusion between the refractory period and the amount of time a man needs to recover between orgasms. For example, a fifty-year-old man might take a couple of days to “feel like” coming. His actual refractory period may be under an hour. If you are curious to test this, try a little experiment. I tried it years ago with surprising results. You need a partner for this. It’s simple and fun. Wait until you haven’t ejaculated in several days. Your partner will masturbate you to orgasm every half hour. She jerks you off to orgasm and then starts a 30-minute timer. At the end of 30 minutes, she does it again. It will take longer and longer, and eventually, no semen will come out. Keep this up until she can’t make you hard after trying for ten minutes.

When I tried this with a friend, I was convinced I might come twice and lose interest. The first time was easy. Thirty minutes later, she began again. I was surprised that I got hard rather quickly. I came after about ten minutes of being jerked off. The next time it took longer, but I still managed to come. She gave up after four orgasms because it was near time for dinner, and my penis was getting sore. I imagine I had at least one more in me. Try it yourself and see.

On the other end of the spectrum, I’ve learned that I begin to lose interest in sex after about two weeks without ejaculating. Yes, I can get hard, but it takes more work, and it isn’t easy to get me off. When I was in my thirties and forties, I would get hornier each day I went without. After fifty, long-term chastity is much less of an issue for a man. A shorter-term lockup with lots of teasing between orgasms might be more fun for both partners.

Spanking and domestic discipline haven’t changed much over the years. Skin tends to thin and become more brittle with age. I suppose this applies to the butt as well as other places. I haven’t noticed any appreciable differences over the years. Well, maybe one comes to mind. I feel the results of a spanking longer than when I was younger. I’ve noticed that after Mrs. Lion finishes, some of my skin feels leathery. Over time (three days or so), it stings sometimes. If I use a good skin lotion back there, the effects are reduced. I’ve started applying CeraVe skin lotion every day or so after I shower. It seems to help keep my skin soft and reduce some of the ill effects. This is sensible at any age.

The biggest change is in flexibility. As we age, our ability to safely and comfortably flex our joints diminishes. This comes up when it comes to bondage and other body positions needed for sex or kink. Knees get sore quickly. Staying on all-fours, particularly on a hard surface, gets problematic. We are all different. Pay attention to how it feels to be in a particular position. If it is difficult, find another, an easier one to assume.

Both women and men find reaching orgasm more difficult with age. Perseverance and sometimes mechanical aids (vibrators, etc.) will make things easier. Some people feel that if they have difficulty getting their partners off, it means there is a loss of love or attraction. It usually doesn’t. Sexual response is affected by many non-sexual things. Stress, lack of sleep, weight gain, and many other factors can screw up sexual response.

The key to kink, as we age, is flexibility and understanding. Experiment and adapt as time passes. Change the rules of the games. Change male chastity from a marathon to a sprint. You don’t have to stop what you like to do. You may need to work out new ways to do them.