By:
In: Lion's Journal

I am in one of my sexual slumps. Today, Friday is the twelfth day since my last orgasm. I should be tree-humping horny. I’m not. If anything, I’m turned off. Mrs. Lion may be able to flip my sexual switch later when she comes home from dinner with the girls. I’m starting to wonder if my difficulty with sex is related to my writing. When I spend entire days working on fiction, my interest in sex seems to evaporate. Maybe the same wellspring of energy is tapped by writing. Anyway, I hope that Mrs. Lion can recharge my battery.

Sometimes Mrs. Lion understands me better than I understand myself. She gives me space when I need it. She can be too giving. Sometimes I need to be pushed. She might not get me as hard as she likes, but she will move me in the right direction. She gets hints from what I write here or from what we exchange in email. More often than not, she doesn’t take my sexual hints. I pay close attention to the ones she sends me.

When I read that I had IcyHot in my future, I felt trepidation. I genuinely dislike feeling my balls burn. I also dislike being spanked. Mrs. Lion is unmoved. No communication of a sexual nature came through today. That usually means she will ignore me sexually. I took a boner pill just in case.

By:
In: CBT

Lion has been busy rewriting his first novel. He also hasn’t been feeling very well. He was pretty tired yesterday. Last night I brought the can of spray-on IcyHot over to the bed. As the dog was being an idiot, jumping on the bed, Lion picked it up and asked what it was. When he read the label, he said that was a horrible thing to do to the poor dog. Later on, he said he wasn’t up for sex or playing. I teased him that he didn’t want to play because he saw the IcyHot.

As always, I’m being flexible with what we do and when we do or don’t do it. If he had asked to play with something other than the IcyHot, I would have obliged. I rarely have my heart set on doing something specific to him. If he has a preference, why not? Of course, if it’s something I don’t particularly want to do, I should get the same consideration.

I assume Lion will be good to go tonight. If not, of course, we will wait. Will I pull out the IcyHot again? I don’t know. He may be waiting for it. Maybe he just needed a night to get his head wrapped around that much pain in such a sensitive area. I doubt it. I think he was tired and/or not feeling well. I’ll try to give him attention earlier this weekend. An afternoon with IcyHot will wake him up, for sure.

By:
In: Anal play

It was a dark and stormy day…and I am not feeling like doing any work. Seriously, it looks like it’s four o’clock in December when it’s ten in the morning. Yuck!

As you’ve probably read in Lion’s post this morning, he’s suggested approaching BDSM like we approached punishment. It’s worth a try. It seemed to work last night. We’ll keep going until it either doesn’t work or works so well we don’t need to schedule things.

The other night when I grabbed salad stuff, I got extra bell peppers so I could make stuffed peppers. My theory was that if I made extra, we could freeze them and have dinners ready for when neither of us has a clue what to eat. The problem with this is that our freezer is jam packed at the moment. I have to get in there and see what can/should be purged. Of course, we can eat some of it too. At this point, we couldn’t buy a turkey breast if we wanted to because there’s no room for it.

Anyway, back to the peppers. Lion asked if I had any ideas for dinner. I said I could do the stuffed peppers. Then he asked if I had any plans for later on. I knew he was referring to his idea of making plans for play, so I told him I was stuffing peppers. And then said I could stuff a Lion too. I tried to shove a plug up his butt on Monday but it hurt too much. He needs more practice. Apparently he’s going to get it. He dubbed yesterday Ass Wednesday. That doesn’t mean he’ll get plugged every Wednesday. It doesn’t even mean he has to wait until Wednesday to get plugged. We just thought it was funny, like Tiesday.

Once he was plugged, I started playing with my weenie. I got him a little hard, but he wasn’t cooperating. Finally I asked him where the raging hardon was. He suggested suing my mouth. My once trusty tongue failed to get him very hard. I’m blaming it all on him. I gave it my best shot. Is it my fault if he can’t take a hint?

I think Lion has entered to point in his waiting that he is less interested. Well, he may be interested, but my weenie is ignoring the memo. We also haven’t been doing much lately to encourage him. And he had a plug up his ass. There were so many things going against him. My tongue didn’t stand a chance. Good thing I don’t give up so easily.

I haven’t figured out what to do tonight. I’m pretty sure Lion will love to hate whatever I come up with.

By:
In: BDSM, Sex

Yesterday morning I was truly out of it. I was feeling sleepy and not particularly alert. After Mrs. Lion went to work, I watched a couple of game shows and then slept for an hour. I didn’t feel much better when I woke up. The night before, I fell asleep while we were watching TV. That didn’t do much to improve our sex life.

It’s not Mrs. Lion’s fault that we aren’t connecting very well. I suppose it’s inevitable that as the years go by and our interest in sex varies more and more, we are good. I have a problem providing satisfactory relief for both of us. I’ve been thinking about this, and perhaps we need the same approach that we took toward spanking and domestic discipline. We recognized that we had no template to follow, and we had to create the habits that supported our decision to add discipline to our marriage.

It’s not optimum to plan our sexual activities in a way that could make Mrs. Lion’s stress level go higher. The invisible to-do list in her head is what I think causes the anxiety. There is a very long list of work that needs to be done here. She’s always had a problem managing tasks. Nevertheless, we have to add sex to the list and put it fairly high in priority.

I haven’t fleshed out exactly what I’m suggesting. The general idea is to schedule sexual activity the same way we set up our punishment days before Mrs. Lion got into the discipline habit. We don’t need the punishment days now because she clearly remembers each opportunity to paddle my bottom. Maybe we need sexy time days. Or schedule sexy time every day at a certain hour.

We could reserve specific days for activities Mrs. Lion might want to execute regularly. For example, I’m out of practice with anal activities. Maybe she needs to schedule “insertion nights” every other day. Perhaps we need to schedule “tease and deny” times and days. I think the biggest problem is that it’s way too easy to decide not to do something. A good example was Tuesday night. We went out and ran some errands that included spending time walking around Costco. I was pretty tired when we got home.

I’m not saying Mrs. Lion should wake me up and begin masturbating me. That probably wouldn’t work. I am saying that we probably should agree on handling the sex if we go out and do things like shopping. In other words, I think we should be actively planning and agreeing on what we will be doing.

That doesn’t mean we schedule giving me orgasms. Mrs. Lion can decide when I get them without planning or discussion. Unless we, or should I say she, plans and communicate what we will do, we will do nothing. This is particularly true about activities I’m not happy about. Things like Icy Hot on my balls or Spankardy, which is fun but uncomfortable, need to be scheduled. There will be times when we have to postpone an activity. I’m suggesting we handle it the same way we handle spanking. If I’m scheduled for an Icy Hot session on Tuesday, and we go shopping, and I end up falling asleep, the Icy Hot session gets rescheduled for the next day.

Mrs. Lion is very good at this sort of thing. She’s learned to remember any scheduled spanking that gets postponed. It’s been a very long time since she put one-off, so long she decided to skip it. Why can’t we do the same sort of thing with sex and play? If Mrs. Lion decides I’m going to get something, I get it even if it must be postponed.

These are just thoughts. I figure we can build on what we do successfully. If we agree that anything sexual or BDSM, once planned, has to happen, then I think we will have the same sort of success we have with spanking. This idea also takes some of the pressure off Mrs. Lion. For example, if she sends me an email that tonight I get Icy Hot on my balls and fall asleep, we both know this activity will happen soon. That means she doesn’t have to worry about doing something she promised at the exact time she said she would do it. It works the spanking, it should work for BDSM and sex.