I am a little surprised that Lion doesn’t know what I like when it comes to sex. I’m talking about sex for me. I know we’ve never been the traditional couple. We never gave each other signals. Lion wanted sex every night. He wanted to have an orgasm every night. He never had to initiate because we were always going to do it. I’d do some bondage, CBT, etc., thing to him, he’d be aroused, I’d climb aboard and get my ya-yas, and then, if he hadn’t come yet, I’d give him his ya-yas. Sometimes I’d tell him I wanted anal or oral. If I didn’t want any ya-yas, I’d jerk him off or suck him. At a certain point, whether because of age, weight gain, or the pressures of life, we backed off from every night. Eventually, it got too much for me to turn him on and then get myself ready, so I just took care of him.
If I ask Lion right now what the sure-fire way is/was to turn me on, he’ll say he doesn’t know. I bet he’d say I never told him. Nope. I told him many times when we first got together. He never tried it, and I’m sure, if he remembers my telling him at all, he doesn’t remember now. But, as I said, we’ve never been the traditional couple. I was never good at telling Lion what I wanted. After a long time of his having sex on his back, he didn’t seem to be able to keep an erection long enough to do anal anymore. Apparently, I trained him only to have sex on his back. I did love Lion riding, but it was pretty stupid of me to train him that way. Of course, it was unintentional.
It was also unintentional to train him not to be able to masturbate. Obviously, with male chastity, I don’t want him to masturbate, but for him to be unable to do it was unintentional. Now I can’t ask him to do it for me. Well, I could. And I’m sure he’d be able to do it with some retraining (untraining?), but we don’t want to tempt fate at this point.
I know none of this has anything to do with Lion not knowing what I like. At least, not in the sense that he talks about in his post. I pointed out that I like his balls hanging low and when they’re tied up, so they bounce along when I jerk him off. He says those are passive things. He wants me to tell him what I want him to do. I think that could work for things he wants to be made to do, but they won’t work in other areas.
I gave the example of telling him how to turn me on. That required him to initiate. He says he’s not good at that, so he rarely tried. On a non-sexual level, over the years, I’ve told him that my family ate Sunday dinner and holiday dinners at mid-day. Some weeks back, I mentioned it again. He said he’s always eaten dinner as the evening meal. He agreed to try to eat earlier, although he thought 1 PM was too early. He thought 4 PM was better. Not only did we not eat at 4, but we also ate later than his normal of 6.
What the hell does dinner have to do with what I like when it comes to sex? If Lion won’t let me have dinner when I want it, what difference does it make what I like sexually? I know it’s splitting hairs, but I immediately thought of dinner times when I read his post. Yes, I am irrational sometimes. For some reason, I’m stuck on the correlation between mid-day dinner and being able to tell him what I like. It makes perfect sense to stand on one leg, tilt your head just a bit and squint really hard.
[Lion — The subject of mid-day Sunday dinner isn’t as simple as Mrs. Lion suggests. I spent five years in boarding school. Sunday dinner was always after church at about 1 PM. We had a light dinner at 6 of 7. I’m not against 1 PM Sunday dinner at all. I just said that I normally eat in the evening. Then, I asked if Mrs. Lion wanted to cook at 11 AM on Sunday. She’s normally buried in her iPad until near noon. I’m OK with a big midday meal on Sunday. I’m just not sure who will cook it.]